I've been meaning to make this, and I just... Haven't been able to bring myself to do it. The original owner of this account, my best friend, my love, my everything, died. The person speaking to you is the one he entrusted everything to. You can call me Amir. You might also know me as Schroeder.

About 2020, Doomspud, or as I knew him, Storm, was diagnosed with Frontotemporal Dementia. Nasty disease. He was 35 at the time. It became exacerbated, because he'd already accepted that he was going to die, and refused to seek any treatments that might prolong his life. He kept the disease to himself for a while, and didn't tell me, or anyone close to him, about it until the signs became too obvious to ignore.

I didn't agree with it. I didn't like it. In fact I hated it, all of it, a lot... But I understood. At least, I understood, after my own near death experience, after enduring months of pain and misery of my own, I understood why he kept it to himself, why he gave up the fight.

In 2023, things became... Bad. His moods, his behaviors, were unstable, and he completely lacked impulse control. This man I speak of was a giant; when I first met him he was 6'6", and by the time he was 38, he had somehow grown to 6'10, and he was very powerful as well. This is not the sort of man you can easily restrain or fight back against when he isn't in his right mind.

One day, Storm truly was out of his mind. I cannot recall what in our conversation that we were having had set him off, but he began to thrash around, throwing himself into walls, screaming at the top of his lungs... And then he struck me. I was far smaller than him, and that one slap sent me to the ground.

When Storm finally became coherent, when he finally realized what he had done, he came to the conclusion that he was too far gone; he didn't even have the capacity to keep himself from harming those he loved in a fit of uncontrollable rage he had no say over.

He began taking steps to finalize his affairs, get everything in order, et cetera... And then he took his own life.

I found him.

I, and everyone else who knew him, were blindsided. Yes, we knew he was dying, I knew he was dying, but I wanted more time. I would've been willing to risk further pain, because I knew the monster that raged around and struck me that one day, was not the man I knew.

Among the many things Storm did to finalize things was, whilst he was still coherent, write down a list of all of his information, passwords, personal data, records and where to find them, things he wanted me to keep, things to share, things that should never see the light of day and would be destroyed, such and so forth.

Storm was my friend. He was my closest friend. My lover. I found out that he had been planning to ask me to marry him, even despite his disease, but chose not to to spare me all of that pain. Another thing I didn't agree with, but... I understood.

If any of you knew Doomspud, or Storm, you knew he was a very complicated individual. For those of you who knew him well, you knew that despite his many flaws, he was a good man, a heroic man, an amazing man, someone to look up to.

Storm had all of this wisdom, even before he was in his forties... I have to wonder if being constantly surrounded by death, only to be confronted with it, marked by it, claimed for the darkness before it should have been your time, if perhaps all of that was what gave him such clarity, and such profound knowledge.

Storm, already a widower himself, is survived by his triplet sons, all of whom I dearly love; and by his nephew, who adopted the children. He had no other family, as his siblings and parents had all passed in various untimely ways over the course of his life.

Even two years later, this loss wounds me deeply...

We shall never see his like again.