I’m struggling with some thoughts and feelings again, and I want to be honest about where I’m at.

I’ve put an enormous amount of time, energy, and care into developing my Stellaria AU over the past four and a half years. I build lore, develop characters, commission art, and share that art across multiple platforms. I work with incredibly talented artists, and the art I commission is high-quality and thoughtfully made. A lot of love goes into this project.

And yet, most of the time, it feels like nobody really cares.

When I post or share things, they often get very few likes, almost no comments, and little to no deeper engagement. People rarely ask questions or show interest in the world itself. Occasionally, posting something in a Discord server will spark a bit of discussion, but for the most part, everything just feels… quiet. Like it disappears into the void.

I know people often say “you should do it for yourself,” and that’s true—I do enjoy this world and these characters. But I also want other people to enjoy it. I want connection. I want engagement. I want to feel like the work I’m sharing resonates with someone else. Right now, it often feels like that just isn’t happening.

Lately, it’s been especially discouraging. My recent attempts to post on Instagram have gotten almost no engagement at all—hardly any likes, and the only comments I’ve received have been from bots. It’s hard not to look at that and wonder what I’m doing wrong, or what I’m supposed to do differently.

What makes it harder is seeing other creatives—especially artists and creators in the kink space—who seem able to generate far more engagement and interest. I’m genuinely happy for them, but it also makes me question myself and my work. After four and a half years, it feels like I’m not really going anywhere, despite how much effort I’ve put in.

Sometimes, that leads to a really painful question: what’s the point of continuing?

I don’t have a clear answer right now. I just know that I’m feeling lost, discouraged, and unsure of where to go from here—and I wanted to put that into words instead of keeping it bottled up.