Sigh, guys, I feel like it would be super important to tell and a huge relief for me, but yeah, I'm cancelling comms... It really hurts for me to do it, because it's so much fun, but due to my limited amount of time and current situation I'm afraid that I can no longer afford finishing the rest of the queue, especially with it being still so long.

Alright, today during work I got to notice how overwhelming my current situation has actually become for me… It’s generally starting to get harder for me to focus, because of two major aspects concerning my life:



Ever since I officially began to work at my part-time job at the bakery I didn’t realize how overwhelming taking commissions could get, especially with letting my queue get so long (I really regret it now)… and I’m seriously feeling frustrated that even after a good month I’ve got to finish less than a half of it. It’s even more of a burden for me to know that it’s going to take another 1 – 2 months until I’ll have completely finished that queue, considering I have to work from around 1 p.m. – 8:30 p.m. on a regular weekly basis, plus I’m going to start officially studying at the university in October… No chance that I’ll be able to manage this! It’s mentally just a really burdening image for me, seeing all of my clients waiting for their comm idea one month long… I- I just can't take it anymore!



And furthermore I’d like to discuss another very important aspect of my life, the most important one… Well, I don’t really feel comfortable sharing it because I have the feeling it’s something people might be looking down upon and not recognizing it as a serious mental issue, but it’s also something that’s been pretty distracting me recently and the reason for my art block this year.



So yeah, I’ve been dealing with body dysmorphia and feeling massively insecure about my own body, finding myself way too skinny and hating absolute every part about my body to being obsessed with my reflection. Now that I’ve got finally the money, I’d prefer to focus on gaining weight rather than drawing. Just can't find any concentration...



Fitting work, gaining and comms all in one is not possible for me at the moment, guys, sorry…



It really hurts me to say it, as doing comms has been really fun for me so far, but I'm afraid I can no longer afford finishing the rest of the queue due to the limited amount of time I have now, but also because I'd really feel the need to recover from the body dysmorphia and discomfort about my body I've been dealing with for nearly 8 months long.



That being said, I'm cancelling the rest of the comm queue, I'm really sorry...

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Instead I'm going to focus on gaining weight until the end of the year and only draw when I'm up to it.