In the wake of the recent political assassination all I can think is this: I hate myself. I hate that I belong to a race of monsters who can only do wrong in this world, I hate that there's nothing I can do to improve the world because I'm inherently evil for being a cis white man, being "pansexual" is a lame cop out excuse. I want to change this part of myself but I can't change what's intrinsic to myself, Some days I wish I could just carve off my own skin so I wouldn't have to be any race. The fact that I am fat only adds to that because it shows that I am wasteful and ugly outside and in...

Now I can make a case for my young continued existence, I don't even know why I keep writing because no one reads my stuff except for my close friends and 1 fan who I am grateful for but is the only person I know of who actually likes my stuff without knowing me. I'll keep writing if only because it's something that helps to distract me from how messed up this world is.

I don't want to be famous, Not really, I just want people to tell me if they like my stories or if they hate them so I can tell me how to improve. Sorry for winding and making everyone put up with this if they even bother read this, But I just have to vent Is an accept my inherent evil for what it is. I'm sorry I keep bothering you people with my crap, But I guess I just don't know when to shut up including right now...

I'm sorry for my own existence and I really wish I could have been born better or that I could change myself to be better, But a friend once told me some valuable advice: People don't change, people can't change, I can't change who I am and what I was born as. I want to express my desires for equality and diversity through my writing but I look around and I find Myself Surrounded by people just like me in the Real world, The internet can only cloak who you are for so long before reality comes out and I'd rather admit to my awfulness than have it exposed by someone else.