So i doubt anyone will read this old journal :P but if anyone who does cares, yes i'll be ac at, either wednesday or thursday night. I'd show up wed if i could find a room for the night, but it looks like i'll be there thursday as things currently stand. Reply here if you're one of those crazy people who wants to meet me for some strange reason or another :P

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7us.....dQ&t=1m34s

right there at 1:34 is a fox, looks like a suit i've seen before but i can't remember who it is, and i can't read the badge cuz the glare

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7us.....dQ&t=1m34s

right there at 1:34 is a fox, looks like a suit i've seen before but i can't remember who it is, and i can't read the badge cuz the glare

:D leave your codes here plz so i can have other people to play with :3. i'd post mine but i'd have to find where i left my 3ds and i'm lazy right now :P so go ahead and post your codes now please :D

Friend of mine is doing her first YCH and for you straight guys out there i gotta say ;) it looks sexy :P http://www.furaffinity.net/view/11842835/ happy bidding, and ya better get in there soon ends saturday at 5pm est

:P so yes, those of you who were trying to figure it out, today is infact my bday :P i'm at 24 years on this planet, :P and there's only 2 hours of this day left >:) mwahahahahahah *derps on everything * :3 derp derp derp derp derp

So i've decided that i'm going to get myself a 3ds for mah birfday, though i thought i'd see if anyone else wanted to sell theirs first before i went out and bought a new one from gamestop.

Also on a side note, i'm doing much better overall :D

So i kept telling myself that i'd made enough whiney journals, but i kinda wanna keep a log of all this myself >.> never been very good at doing actual journals or diary things, and it just feels like it'll be good for me to do so. So what i've decided to do, is to edit this journal over and over for a little while so express my feelings, without filling up everyone's inbox, but they can still check if they really wanna know how i'm doing.

I kinda feel like i need to do this as a way to help me keep track of time as well, because i would SWEAR that several weeks have passed since he left, when in actuality . . . this is day number 4 x.x

That being said i think i'll do a recap of what happened what days, and again this is more for myself than anyone else, but you are all welcome to read it

Wednesday July 17th - Wolf leaves a lot later than he should have, largely in part due to me being very clingy and sad about him leaving. . . lots of tears were had, and i think making him remove his tag from my collar to symbolize what was really happening hurt one of the most, but it did have to happen.

Thursday July 18th- Honestly i don't even remember much of this day . . . it's become such a blur.

Friday July 19th I really need to give a good shoutout to  silverpalth and  Takathekitty for coming over to visit me and help me get through that night, it was really rough especially since i had to work that day x.x I also got the wonderful text from wolf saying that he made it to texas safely, so at least that was some good news.

Saturday July 20th Work was pretty rough again, but i managed to make it though, and took myself and  Kdevan to the Delaware furbowl, x.x damn do i hate those stupid toll roads >.> 12 bucks in tolls *gripe gripe gripe*. Thank you to everyone who was there and gave me support at the meet, :D i had a great time even though i forgot my fursuit head and couldn't suit ;-;, ah well i went ahead and got in the human pic this last time :P for any of you who don't know what i look like, i'm hidden in there somewhere, almost like a where's waldo :P. I also met up with some of the gettysburg furs that night and they came back to my place and kept me company saturday night into sunday.

Sunday july 21st- i'd like to thank  spookythewolf  wolffan98  Minarabbit and :iconrenamon1983 for your guys support and hugs, especially when i broke down again. I thought i was doing alright and that i was over at least the majority of the pain . . . yeaaaaaaa-no. I ended up texting wolf about something and how derpy he and i were about whatever, and he made the comment "we're quite the pair aren't we?" just saying that we're both total derps and my reply was "Yea we are" and then "well. . . at least we were" . . . and that simple change in wording broke me allll over again ;-;. On a much much happier note, they were also able to help me rearrange the furniture that my pet had moved in from his apartment to here like at the beginning of the month. So now the Furniture in the living room is actually placed in a very welcoming manor, :D makes this feel much more like a home and a lot less like just . . . a thing? i dunno it makes me feel better >.< that's what's important so thank you again guys :D

Monday July 22nd- Short day at work today so that's pretty good, I was suppose to have someone come over and hang out today, but those plans seem to have fallen through x.x so i'll probably start texting people here when i'm done with this journal to see who's available. I'm also starting to worry about other things now too =/ i mean my bday is a little over 3 weeks away. And really i don't have much to show for my life x.x another year gone, another year wasted. All i really did this entire past year, was work at shitty jobs, make very little money, and move away from family. I like the fact that i'm not being reliant on my family to survive, but at the same time it's not like i really have much of a survival at the moment, I really need to start looking at better jobs, and making enough money that i can afford to regularly visit a chiropractor, and massage therapist so that i can get my messed up back fixed a bit. If i can do that, then i can possibly get back into nursing, even if that's not really what i want to do with the rest of my life. If i do manage to get back into nursing i either need to start networking and finding people who have family members who need taking care of, so i can kinda work for them directly, :P or find a rich cub who can hire an actual CNA to take care of them XD. . . heh heh yeaaa i know better than to think that would ever happen :P. Oh speaking of my license i guess i should get around to getting my PA CNA license reciprocated into MD huh, hmmmm.

Tuesday July 23rd - a big thanks to  strawbunny and rexxie and her boyfriend (who's name I will butcher if I try to so it from memory) for helping through that day. Even though it was overall good day, I got some bad ish news as well. The 3ds I'd been working on for a month now is fully dead, so all 300 street passes and puzzle pieces I got at ac are down the drain, plus now I don't have a 3ds,so unless someone wants to sell me theirs I guess I'll just cave and buy one :(
Wednesday July 24th - really crappy morning, I went to bed (much later than I should have for such an early shift) but before sleeping my back hurt me really bad, I got up and tried to stretch out felt this pop and then I didn't hurt anymore. I was like "Ohhh I think i did something right, first time in a long time I haven't hurt. . ." seconds later "oh oh shit nope nope, I did something wrong, I think i just pulled something, at which point I did the things I should have done the first time my back got hurt, I ran for the ice and ibuprofen to make the swelling stop, and even as I write this a day later I'm still using ice X.x, so hopefully whatever I did won't make matters worse. on a better note, my pet ended up coming home early, so i didn't have to sleep alone last night :3, and while I don't think this will fully fix the problems, I think it should definitely help.

Well that's all for the moment, thank you all for your kind words and your help getting me through this rough time. I never realized just how many people i had to really cared about me :) and it's great to see, thank you guys. Also, i'm sorry i haven't replied to everyone's comments, i kinda fell into a slump after the first journal, but i'll see if i can get back around and reply to them individually here soon. Thanks again guys :D

~ps, my personal drama aside, i just this very second (like a few hours after writing the journal) saw this, and i think everyone else should, this almost brought me to tears as well https://twitter.com/LettersOfNote/s.....66242227458048

~~sooooo . . . yeaaaaaa. . . made another one, rather than keep on making more i'm just going to edit the next one over and over each day . . . kinda sorta if i get to it. http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/4871059/

Sorry i'll try to stop making new journals, and this one should be pretty close to the last one anyway.

Wolf has officially left.

The plan was for him to head out around 6 . . . aaaaaaand he left closer to 8 . . . 30. . . ish. . .i unno not like i was keeping track of time, point is it was much later than he had wanted to, but realistically every second of that time was needed. Between us both being adhdish derps (well i'm adhd at least, :P but he was being about as bad as me) it took longer than it should have to get everything in his vehicle, . . . and in the process his vehicle also got filled with mosquitoes, and they loooooooove him (sweet blood he says) so i hope he didn't get eaten too badly.

Many snuggles were had, even more hugs, especially after he removed my collar for the final time, symbolizing the end of our relationship altogether :(. I'm not usually one for crying, and to be honest, i can still count the number of times i've cried in the last 10 years between my hands . . . or at least i could have until today, and if i'm not careful that number might still go up before the night is over. As it is now, i should have gone to bed over an hour ago due to work in the morning, deeeeeffffinately not looking forward to it, but at least it's a shorter-ish day.

If anyone wants to do something tomorrow (thursday) i get off at noon.

That's how things stand right now, kinda numb at the moment, but any time i try to think back on the good fun happy times i just feel the tears starting all over again . . . like right now. So that being said I'd better head on off to bed, wish me and him luck on getting through this.

Thanks guys for your support, you're all great. See some of you this weekend at furbowl, so long as i can keep my emotions in check (a cried in fursuit head just sounds gross, especially if my nose runs x.x) i think i'll go ahead and get in suit, should help up my spirits a bit i hope.

I think this will be the last journal update i make on FA, unless you guys really want me to keep doing them, otherwise hit me up on a messenger for more details, can note me about it if you need the info

~~Hopefully Final ish update http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/4854865/ ~~

So there was some confusion with wolf if he was being pcs or tdy with his deployment (only thing i understand is pcs is longer term and tdy is like temporary stuff). They flip flopped him back and forth until yesterday (yes the day before he leaves) until finally he finds out it's pcs, so it means he'll be gone for a longer term. He did promise to come visit at least once within the next year, but i'm expecting it to be like a week or so at most :( so that does mean That this is an official breakup. I know some of you were saying to just wait it out and that he'd be back, but it was already discussed, and today will be my last day as his dog :(, he isn't leaving for a few more hours though, so that'll be good, but i'll have to go to bed soon after for work tomorrow, so anyone looking for me you'll have better luck tomorrow.
I'm still kinda in shock at the moment and i'm not sure the reality of everything has hit my emotions just yet, but i'm expecting that sometime around ish (before or after) this weekend.

*shakes head* but that's enough of me whining about stuff, it's just life right :D just gotta push forward and make it one paw at a time. Thank you all for the kind words of encouragement, and i hope to talk with some of you soon, and hang with others soon as well *hugs and licks everyone*

**update here http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/4853274/ **


So this is one of those rare journals where i'll actually sit down and type out what's going on in my life. Some of you may have no interest in this at all and that's fine, surf to another page and look at some adorable puppy pics or something for now, but for those of you who care this is what's going on with me.

WARNING: I'm not in the best state of the mind right now, so do expect this journal to be wordy, all over the place, and kinda a mess.

So those of you who know me in person or have chatted with me semi frequently will know that I'm currently living down in Maryland with my trainer Alltari, and for those of you who don't know, NO this isn't my OWNER, my owner is xijque and i've been collared to him for several years now (:P damn zeek to have this crazy dog this long you must be an insane fox).

I'll go ahead and take a moment to explain the concept and difference. So sometime after joining the fandom, when i really started to look at my character and stopped just being http://www.furaffinity.net/view/2071744/ ya know a random wolf, I started to think about what really matched me well. After deciding on the breed (the colors came back when i was still just a wolf) that fit me well, i still felt something was off. When i found out about  feralfurs i realized that felt much better so feral tech was born. This was fine and dandy for me for a while, until AC2012 when i RE-met alltari (i met him the year before but we barely talked) and puppy play was introduced to me. Well this just blew my world and everything started to fit for me, the desire to bark like a dog for fun, enjoying running on all fours, feeling that i needed to be owned and have someone to look up to, puppy play was what i'd been looking for. Luckily for me this is what Alltari was into, and after discussing it with xijque, Alltari took me in as his pup. So to wrap that all up, he is my Dog trainer/handler for me being a human(furry?) dog.

(phew that was a muzzleful to type)

So i've lived here in maryland with my trainer for several months now, but unfortunately for me, he's in the military, and is being sent off to texas for stuff. We already discussed things and it was decided that i could not go along with him. At the time of writing i have close to 24 hours left with him, and i'll tell you what, my emotions are all over the place right now (work tonight is going to be fun x.x) but at the same i'm i almost just feel numb. I would probably forget that i had emotions right now if it wasn't for the face that every so often this moisture in my left eye seems to build up and run down the side of my face into this pillow i'm laying on now.

As far as what this means for Me leaving, I am not. I'm staying in the exact location where i am now, because Alltari agreed to rent his house out to me and my pet while he was gone. Luckily for me this also means i won't have to be fully alone while living here (cuz that would probably suck enough that i'd move back to PA with family) HOWEVER, he's currently out of town ;-; and will be until the end of the month.

That means that Not only am i losing my trainer who i'm very very close to, but also i will be fully alone for a few weeks to wallow in my misery. Probably about the only real thing that will keep me from getting overdepressed is the fact that i still have to go to work most days.

I've also arranged for me to be able to make it to the delaware furbowl this weekend, mostly because i know i'm going to need to get out of the house and doing some suiting might help me a bit, so if you're there, . . . please give me lots of hugs ;-; pretty sure i'm gonna need em.

That's pretty much the entire update of my life as it is right now, i know the world isn't ending but sometimes it sure can feel like it.

For those of you who have read down this far, I'd going to presume you're the ones who really care (especially if you read that clusterfuck of text i just threw up there) I'd like to ask you guys a favor. Please, invite me to hang this coming week, come visit me, give me a call, send a text . . . I figure if i'm going to get through this week with at least part of my mind still intact i'm going to need to rely on my friends. I just hope i actually have enough out there ._.

Anyway sorry again for this big jumble of text, I hope the rest of you have a great time alright *hugs everyone* take care

So let me start out by saying, Yes i know my name is tech :P yes i know i'm suppose to be the techie here and know allllll about computers, However, to be frank about it, i've been slacking off on keeping up to date on hardware parts. Of course as we all know to really know which parts are the best you gotta keep up to date on them ^^;;.

That being said here's my situation... I have 5 days to order parts, i need to build myself a computer from the ground up, the only parts i currently have are the video card and hard drive.
This means i still need to find the best deal on the following
Tower/case
PSU
RAM
CPU (Quad-core or better)
CPU Fan
MOBO (one that supports CrossFire if possible)

I can't really think of anything else i MUST find, some things i would like to find if possible are:

BluRay burner
SSD


I know this is kinda last minute, but unfortunately for me the clock is ticking and with this being the week before ac i'm just tugged in too many directions with things to do to really put in all the research myself, so if anyone is willing to help me i really do appreciate it.

Thanks a bunch guys and gals :D

:D no meme this time, but i'm going to AC this year, I'll be staying at the westin and arriving on wednesday.

If anyone wants to hang out be sure to contact me before the start of the con and get my phone number or something. Also do keep in mind you'll need to CALL me, seeing as i'll probably be in suit for most of the duration of the con and have a rough time feeling and hearing text messages.

That's all :D if yall have any questions feel free to ask them below. Also let me know who else is going so we can at least say hi this year :D

also peek over here http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/4751973/ and help me get a movie i wanna see badly on netflix please :3

So, there is a video that was on netflix years ago that i'm trying to bring back. I never really realized this before but you can simply contact the netflix chat thingy and request videos. This video is fairly rare but was fairly amazing, with several well known singers of the old days, the one that stands out to me personally is B.B. King. It's a fully animated movie with anthro characters singing and dancing, you can find clips of it on youtube HERE and Here, the song is in english btw


If you don't have a Netflix account:


What i need from you: Please log on to your netflix account, click help> Start live chat> when you get an agent just let them know you would like to request the movie "the fearless four" it's the animated movie about the dog, donkey, rooster, and cat... and that's all, they should put in a request for you, and after we get enough they should hopefully bring it back

For more information about this please check out the imdb http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0119170/

So it turns out that (if things go according to the new plan) that i'll actually be staying right here south of baltimore in maryland :D. Hopefully this won't change at least for a good few months, and (if things actually work in a nice direction for me) possibly longer.

To be fair though, that would require me to either get a nicer paying job, or find a job that I fully enjoy (not to say that i don't have fun at my current job, but it's simply not my calling ya know)

Anyway felt like i should update people :D thats all



. . . ok i'm done, you can go now







. . . you're still here???





*stops caring and just munches on my cookies* hey i tried to wait until you left cuz i don't have enough to share :P but yall just kept sticking around *sticks out tongue*

So, given all the new local furs to watch me on here i figured it would be easier to just make a journal to update everyone rather than trying to go person to person. So, as many of you will know, i'm currently living down near baltimore MD, (not in baltimore but if you really wanna know exactly where then come talk to me :P), However, come july i will be moving one way or another. Where i'll be going is still a bit up in the air, and there is only a 5% chance i'll end up sticking around MD at all.

That being said, i figured i'd give everyone a warning, If you wanted to actually hang with me in person and chill out or something, you have a few months left to do so, before it'll be a much longer trip to do so (assuming i just move the 2 hours back to pa, which isn't concrete atm either).

That's pretty much all, poke me in private if you want to plan something with me, and i hope to talk to and see some of you soon :D

http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/4323096/ check it out

Anyone who wants a copy of dirt 3, i got a copy of it with my graphics card, but i'm not big racing games, so does anyone want to trade me for another game or buy the copy directly from me?

So i was thinking to myself about how i really haven't done much with studying or learning anything since school. I'd really like to change that, however, just like when people want to go to the gym but don't want to do it alone due to lack of motivation; I've decided that having someone who wanted to learn along with me would help greatly :D. So is there anyone out there who would like to do some review math, programming, or even learn spanish or something along with me? I just really need a motivator or even someone to compete against with it.

:D thanks for reading and for helping me find someone guys i appreciate it a lot

http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/4234544/

He's been a really bad doggy, who's going to get to punish him ;)

http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/4005440/ go there, nuff said

^^;; ok so i was talking with a few people about commission things, and i can not for the life of me remember who it is right now, i could go scrounging through a ton of notes and see if i can locate it, but that's a loooooooot of notes x.x so instead i'll just post this here. If I LEGITIMATELY owe you money, note me about it, and we'll see if i we straighten it out x.x i don't like owning people money and i wanna clean up all my bills, so here's your chance to collect on them. Thanks a bunch for reading :3

so we all already know that corgi's are like friggin adorable (especially when they're pissed off XD) so like tell me why you haven't gotten your character corgified yet? :O freaking go get it done now http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/3605377/  totter is doing them for only like 5 bucks,
like this one http://www.furaffinity.net/view/8247950/
and this one http://www.furaffinity.net/view/8252324/
get cho asses over there and get one :3 i'm waiting for my own

plus if you do buy them, the artist is looking at making a fursuit with the monies. . . a POMERANIAN FURSUIT, cmon guys you know we all wanna see this <3 IT'S GONNA BE SO FRIGGIN FLUFFEHHHHHHH

ball!!! so play with me maybe? :D *puppydog eyes*

:D anyone who is here and wants to meet up with me should reply and ask me for my cell phone number, cuz i'll totally be around until monday