well surgery is finished im back on my feet mostly and my drs say im recovering amazingly well soon im hopeing 2 not have 2 be on as many pain killers as i have been but im now moved out of the recovery room where they had me for about 2 days but im feeling a loooot better now and i want 2 thank every1 who has been giving me support and such in the sides even when it wasnt on FA so thx a ton everybody :3

ok getting surgery 2morow on my back surgery day being the 11-19-2013 at 7:30 AM after i will be recovering for about a week or so then start up with radiation theropy so yay things r going 2 go good by the look of it :3

well i didnt do an update about my last trip 2 the treatment center but in a nut shell we got me a pain pump and the meds in it worked for about 2 weeks then things got progressiviely worse and we had 2 take me up again 2 here on my current trip.


now...for the news i got yesterday i had 2 go 2 the OICC which is sort of like the treatment centers 2nd ER and while waiting for me 2 be admited cause the rooms where filled up the day before that and while waiting they gave me an MRI 2 see wat exactly was causeing all my back problems i was waiting in the room literally unable 2 lay down stand sit or walk with me on my knees and my arms on the seat of the chair hunched over because it was the only way i could rest out it hurting me 2 the point of causing me 2 cry and then my pain management dr walked in and said 2 me and my mom "we got the results back from your MRI and there is no easy way 2 say this but the scan showed that u have cancer in ur tail bone" he said we will be doing treatment for it next week eather on monday or tuesday he walked out appologizing and just saying he felt we should be the 1st 2 know wat they found after he shut the door i bent over on the chair having a mental break down and started crying and simply said "im going 2 die" im still very upset about all this but im supposed 2 be having surgery and radiation next week on monday or tuesday this being in a couple days. im hopeing and praying that this will go good and going on wat the drs have told me it sounds like we where able 2 catch this fairly close 2 the begining as far as getting my next round of chemo goes i have no idea wat they will be doing as far as that goes so if u r a watcher for me if u could leave a support comment it would mean alot cause this entire thing has got me scared really bad but im trying 2 be optomistic that this will all turn out alright.

TheOwlette is doing a free art raffle u should really enter her stuff is amazing u can enter here: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/5235763

dreaming daemus is doing another free art raffle she is really good so u should enter for the chance 2 get some really cool art u can enter here: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/5233341/

:3 hello again all well i am back and have been for about a week and a half now from my last trip 2 CTCA and we have hopefully gotten most of my pain problems out of the way ive been hooked up with a pain meds pump that i can carry around with me i will be uploading a couple pics pretty soon of wat it looks like.


so im excited 2 go back again cause im getting scanned 2 see if this new chemo has been working or not and by how ive been feeling lately im hopeing it is :3 so wish me luck

btw also i have the supplys for making my glass pendents plus a few extra new molds 2 try out so when we get some room in the basement cleared out i should be able 2 make a couple examples and upload them 2 show ppl i cant wait 2 get started with this all

JosePaw is doing a free art raffle you should enter for the chance at some awesome free art u can enter here: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/5194463/

I guess I should update since im going 2 CTCA later this week...um well the genetic chemo they had me on turned out 2 be a flop stuff didnt have any affect on my tumor at all and the cancer ended up enlarging slightly and yet again spread a little bit more.

So they switched me 2 really heavy chemo which is y this update is so late cause the last 2/3 weeks ive been feeling like total hell and my back still hasnt gotten any better. they perscribed me some pain patches that work for 3 days and it seems 2 be an up hill down hill thing because half the time i have 2 keep taking my other heavy pain killers just 2 prevent myself from laying in bed all day screaming from intolerible pain.

well...wat else...o yea couple days ago my hair started falling out so i got 2 spend this last week end literaly pulling it out in handfulls and throwing it away im fairly close 2 being bald i just need my parents 2 shave off wats left cause i look like total crap anyway (srsly no joke i look like i aged about 50 or 60 yrs)

on the up side of things i guess i have all the things i need 2 start making my glass pendents so thats pretty exciteing i just need the room downstairs 2 be cleared off on the table and i should be able 2 start and upload a couple of examples. also kinda happy the ppl at the store where i get my glass supplys gave me an almost 50% off discount on these halloween theam glass dots that can basicly be melted down and the mini image on them spreads out and becomes bigger i would really like 2 make a few of those while its still halloween season the diff glass images on them r a skull, spider, bat, mummy head, and frankenstien head if im able 2 make a couple examples i will upload pics here for any1 possibly interested in it.

also i guess things r going a bit better for me on the chemo i still hurt cause of my still uncontrolable back pain and its starting 2 make me lose sleep at night cause i wake up from it and i have 2 take pain meds pretty much 24/7 just 2 keep myself from being in constent pain even then it doesnt always help ealyer 2day i woke up from a nap and instantly started screaming because it felt like some1 was trying 2 forcavly remove my nuts with a vice soooo not much fun there lol. anyway thx for every1 who watches my page im hopeing i can ask for a couple more commissions from some artists i like and have been wanting 2 commission (i also have a couple of commissions im currently waiting for so hope u guys look forward 2 seeing those as much as i do) well i think thats about it i will keep cheaking FA every now and then 2 try and stay caught up with ppl.

Dusty Star is doing a free sketch enter this while u can there is only a 1 hr window 2 enter this u can sign up here http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/5117123/

well im going back 2 the treatment center next week and i will be getting scanned 2 see if the genetic chemo im on is working. im also going 2 be getting ANOTHER pain block cause last time when i was supposed 2 get 1 they changed the procegure on me at the last min including the meds that they put into my back which resulted in me getting 6 needles in my back for no reason, no releafe from my back spazums, and then about a week after i got home me becoming unable 2 move out of my bed because of how bad my back hurt. SO THEY BETTER GET IT RIGHT THIS TIME >w> untell then ive had 2 pretty much keep myself constenly drugged with a muscle relaxer and my heavy pain killers just 2 get through the day and that only takes the edge off the pain my back still hurts quite a bit. anyway hopeing that the new chemo works like its supposed 2 because this will mean im closer 2 curing my cancer and if im lucky i will get some of my apitite back (my back spazums have screwed up my lower back my left shoulder give me horrible head acks on a bad day and have made me not want 2 eat much for most of the day). also i may have 2 get my esophogus dialated again i had this done my 1st time up at the treatment center because i couldnt swallow my food without it getting caught at the bottom of my throat and then after forcing it through with something 2 drink i would then run off 2 the bathroom and try 2 throw up because it activates my gag reflex at the same time. anyway so fun all around for my next trip im looking at possibly 2 or 3 procegers happening next time i go so wish me luck cause im on my own for 3 days and its not going 2 be easy

JosePaw is having a free raffle u can get sign up for it here http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/5091297/

purplepardus is doing a free raffle u can enter for it here: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/5078854/

Dreaming Daemus is doing a free headshot raffle for the season u can enter here: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/5075503/

Dustystar is doing free sketches u can send ur info in here http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/5074275/

dreamingdaemus is having a free art raffle u can enter here: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/5057844/

HydraDelDiablo is doing free sketches u can enter here http://www.furaffinity.net/view/11569279/

Foxgear is doing a art raffle u can enter here: https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/5041429/

I got home 2day the trip was...ok? idk kinda in a bit of pain the block they gave me they desided 2 give me a "local anistedic" which is short for we strap u 2 the operating table and stick needles in ur lower back 2 numb it before putting the block in so needless 2 say my lower back is sore as hell from that and last night remembering the feeling of the needles about drove me 2 throwing up (yes it hurt that bad). anyway good news is my blood work is better then it was last time and if the pain block hasnt started working by monday i can call into the treatment center and my dr's assistant will write me a perscription for really strong pain killers 2 take the edge off. so all in all pretty good news all around. also exciteing news i got a new mold for the glass pendent project i will be starting the 2 molds r in the shape of old fashion keys and i will be uploading pics of what the pendents will look like as soon as im able 2 get started on it (still trying 2 get a freaking microwave)

Dreaming Daemus is doing a free art raffle u can enter here: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/5036656/

Dustystar is doing free feral sketches here: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/...../#cid:35845242

dreamingdaemus is doing a free art raffle enter while u still can :3 enter here

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My next trip 2 Chicago is next week and i found out yesterday im approved on friday 2 get another pain block in my back so yay there so wish me luck my back has been killing me over the last couple weeks (part of this is not wanting 2 eat and making me feel like im going 2 throw up) so having the pain gone will really help with this annoying situation

Dreaming Daemus is doing a free art raffle 2 adopt a dragon u can enter here: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/4988081/ the dragons r cute and there can only be 4 winners so good luck 2 all who enter

AgentDiegoo007 is doing a free art raffle O: it ends the 1st of next month so enter while u can info is here: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/4978281/

so i came up with an idea i hadnt thought of before 2 make some extra money... >w> as no1 here knows i have had practice with glass forming in high school plus i have the suplys for making it so i might start making glass pendents and selling necklaces (i will probly upload pics of said stuff here when i make it) if any1 is interested im probly going 2 be selling them at about $25 at most simpler stuff will be cheaper (this depends on the glass matterials i use 2 make said pendents) but im also easy on prices i might do a few auctions. also if u have anything special in mind (this involves color of pendent glass/possisshion of melted glass inside of said pendent) just ask me im pretty flexible about it (wont be able 2 get started on this for a few days cause of lack of microwave 2 put the glass kiln in) after that i will be able 2 show examples :3