Hello. it's been quite a while,so I guess I'll give some sort of
update on things overall.

I wasn't doing well AT ALL during the time I was away,but I managed to get back up,
and I'm ready to keep trying now. difficult experiences can certainly open our minds
and make us stronger,that's for sure. I screwed up in several areas,but not moving
forward will do no good. so,We just press on.

I'll keep trying to pay the bills through commissions,and squeeze personal projects
between them,no matter if it's a SINGLE one every year. that's truly all there is to it.
no--seriously: I REALLY mean that. whatever else it is,I don't care.
so,We all good? cool. Here's to a better year,then. Cheers.

Yo. soooo... in case you didn't know: FA is literally the only place you can find Me and my art currently.
(and maybe e621? but I only drop a thing or two there once in a blue moon.)

I've been stalling making a secondary/backup account for a long time now,because
I am in fact THAT lazy. But with recent news that you all must be fully aware by now,
I remembered that unexpected things happen all the time,and it's better to
be safe than sorry. I still plan on staying around here until the end,but a "plan B" won't hurt.

I'm very disconnected from everywhere else,so I'm asking you: reading this, the place where you want me
to have an account on. literally anywhere besides X/Twitter. preferably one that allows
NSFW content and both human and furry characters, because that's literally what I do.

I know some of you have been following me for several years,despite how quiet I am,despite how
slow my uploads are,and for that I'll always be grateful. so I think this choice should be mostly yours.

that's all. thanks for your time.

Yo. I'm still alive. even though for a while I wished I wasn't,but this doesn't matter anymore.
I get it: moving forward is the only option. complaining doesn't help and expecting others to solve
your problems is dumb. "Grow a pair", "Git Gud" or whatever else you wanna call it. let's move on.

Last year I was only able to make 3 personal projects...during the WHOLE year. so I'd like to squeeze
more of them between my commissions in 2024 if possible. if you miss seeing more of my OCs,
wish me luck,I guess. (or commission them yourself,LOL.) survival comes first,unfortunately.

I still have pending matters that need to be taken care of,but just know things are more-or-less OK now.
if you're going through difficult times yourself,believe that you can get over it, and good luck.

It's just "one of those months" I guess... anyway:general consensus
seem to point that I should just take some time off,so I'll do that.

I was concerned before because I thought that wasn't a real possibility.

Not every artist that works with art can afford to walk away for a while
without consequences like this. there are always bills to pay. but I've
been saving up,so I can. one thing to be grateful for,I suppose.

personal art projects are a different can of worms though. one that I'll
only open after this break. but maybe if I try out different things and
make them more simple/sketchy,there's still a chance I'll do them in the future.

but that's truly all for now. until some other day.

I've been really limping my way through the things I've done for the last couple months,
and to be completely honest,I think I'm starting to reach my limit.

so,before I start taking meds or some other drastic alternative,I made this journal
to make sure I tried everything I could to "get back to normal". fuck my pride,yeah?

so yes:I AM asking if you can do literally anything that might help out,
even if words are the only thing that you can offer. and I'd rather not
tell in exact detail what's been happening in my personal life. not now,at least.

EDIT: if you'd like a more direct question,then: what keeps you
going in your life/job? the money? validation from others? passion about what you create?

I'm slightly curious about 2 things,so I guess I'll just ask directly:

1- Which character not called Rhaja do you wish to see the most from me,if any?

2- If you you're a commissioner,what kind of content do you prefer to pay for?
(as in: regular commissions,YCH,new original characters?)

That's all for now. take care.

Ahhhhhh....I'm tired. so tired that I don't want to type yet another massive wall of text.
it's just the usual shit. so,why bother explaining it over and over again?

I don't want to make a journal with just 2 lines though ,so I'll try to give these peeps a little boost:

 Thespeedyraisin_arts Good friend. Please consider giving a watch and some favorites.
And if you're feeling extra nice:a commission slot and some compliments would also probably make Him very happy.

 adagadeprata Does some really good muscular anatomy artwork,be it guys or girls. Check him out!
He's usually down in the moods,so--nice words alone would also probably help this really nice fella.

 Folk-dude-Philip Sells really good artwork. if you're looking for anime/manga styled character commissions,
I truly recommend this dude right here. (and his bro, Cyborg-steve too.)

 cpwny Really nice guy with some very good,quality-consistent artwork. Go check him out!
A bunch of really well done OCs will be waiting for you. (He also prints content at alarming speeds.)

if this actually helps these guys out,even a little bit,I might do it again with
other people in the future. but that's it for now,see ya.

Hello again. last journal was GINOURMOUS,so I'll tell you the abridged version of it
in case you didn't have the time or interest to read it:

-Something something,social anxiety,inferiority complex,kinda tired.
pls,no high expectations. thanks for the support,and MOVING ON!

=======================================

All the commissions of 2021 got properly finished! yaaay~ Look at me Mom!

 mmxalt [done]
 violettovalentine [done]
 iroujas [done]

Hello. This journal is rather long,so if you're here just for the occasional art,please ignore it.
I'm alive,and I'll start updating stuff more often now,so there's no need for alarm.
but if you want to better understand myself as a person,then good luck with this bloody walltext.

I've been on this platform for 10 years now,so I feel like I should address some things,once and for all.
while there wasn't a single time that I tried to act like someone I wasn't,I did keep most personal things to myself.
I wanted to keep my feelings and problems as far as possible from this "artist business",but well:FUCK IT. I'm
a flawed Human,so today I will hammer this idea on everyone that decides to read this.

I've always tried to keep my social interactions at minimum on purpose. they scare the shit out of me:I'm always concerned
that I'll give an opening for people to hurt my feelings,get me cancelled,or that I'll disappoint the more I spend time with them.
this haven't changed and will probably never change. but even with this oyster attitude,I got myself some
people that don't seem all that bothered by it,and even though I barely talk to them,they seem to accept my flaws and interact with me.
so,thanks to them I was able to keep at it,but I'm aware that I'm not making things easier for them,or anyone else for that matter.

the reason behind my social anxiety is most likely because of past experiences.
I came across so many jerks over the years:people that used me for their personal gains,people that ditched me when they found others more interesting,
people that manipulated me,people that tried to cancel me when they found out about my personal tastes,and many more...
I know there might be cool people out there that I could share a healthy friendship with,but I'm a coward. plus:I hate myself,and I think
I'm doing them a favor by not getting close to them anyway. so you're not missing out on anything,honestly.

"why do you hate yourself?" you ask. Because I'm self aware of all my flaws and I don't do shit about it.
I don't have any dreams,goals or ambitions. I embraced mediocrity,stopped trying to become a better person and artist,
I don't try to have new experiences because I'm scared of the potential frustration. all this causes a deep void
inside of me that I don't try to fill,I simply try to live with it. so,I'm actually very edgy and sour,but this might
come as a shock because I don't like to complain like a bitch online. shit happens on a daily basis,even though
I try so hard not to cause problems to others and do what I can. it's making me really tired of it all.

this caused my last hiatus to happen. I've tried to see the bright side of things and be grateful for what I have,
but at the end of the day,I was mostly able to move on because I had literally no other option. death will come to me when
the time is right,so meanwhile,I'll just try to survive the best way I can and have fun,if possible.

If I don't sound happy to you,it's because I'M NOT. I appreciate when people ask me if I'm OK or if they can help,
but honestly:they usually can't. I often don't tell when I'm suffering to not worry the people that truly care,
but words can only do so much. and besides:I don't usually help people out,so I feel unworthy of their help,anyway.
Every now and then I fail to keep my emotions in check and end up doing stupid things too. emotions like jealousy,for example.
It pains me to admit,but because I feel so unsatisfied about myself,I avoid some people,sometimes because I feel my art is way too inferior
to theirs and will never get there,or when they're extroverts and friends with everybody. I'm aware that they probably deserve these
things most of the time,but it doesn't change the fact that I feel bad about myself when I look at them,so I try to escape...
I'm sorry for doing this,but I don't expect sympathy for it. just wanted to get it out of my chest after so long.

and finally,about art: I've been scared of possible backlash if I drew some "unorthodox" stuff,but you know what?
for the longest time I wasn't having fun at drawing--AT ALL. I just did it for the momentary dopamine of "Look,I did a thing!",but over time,
I was spending way too much time and energy on my drawings,and wasn't feeling fulfilled by them in the end. this also had an impact on
my productivity and overall art quality. I'm ashamed about how I was pretty much a BOT,by adding no substance to my drawings
titles and descriptions,and not trying experimental and original stuff...you know:drawing for FUN? just because I need to sell my art
for a living,it doesn't mean that I shouldn't use it to express my emotions and have fun with it every once in a while,right?
I wasn't feeling good to do stuff for the past 5 months,especially drawing. but that was more than enough time to get up after such
a majestic fall. can't promise I won't let people down again,but I'm really trying NOT TO now. my sincere gratitude to the people
that helped me get this far. I'm worthless all by myself.

aaaand,THAT'S IT. if you somehow managed to read all this nonsense:thank you. see ya~

Hi. yep,I didn't die. first of all,I'd like to apologize for the 3 people that have been
on my commission wait list for so long. I'm really sorry,I didn't mean to take so much time.

a bunch of stuff happened,but if I'm honest,up until this point I only made commissions a priority
when I really had to. but my drawing mood is extremely volatile as well,and I'd rather not pick slots
until I feel absolutely ready to handle them without any problems. that said,I feel like I've done
enough personal projects and pending promises by now,and as the title says: I'll try to start and properly
finish the remaining slots without getting anything in between them. I'll be around if anyone needs to know
anything else. in a future update I'd like to address some things about myself,but for now,this will do.

commission price sheet link: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/35720621/

COMMISSION WAIT LIST:

 iroujas
 mmxalt
 violettovalentine

UPDATE: [26/07/2020]

Sorry for the long hiatus,I wasn't doing too well.
I plan on getting back on the current wait list in the next couple of days though,
and as always,if you need anything,just say the word.

===================================

Commission price sheet link:

https://www.furaffinity.net/view/35720621/

How I deal with commissions:

I prefer to take one slot at a time and work on it until I'm finished before taking the next one.
I won't ask for payment until I'm ready to properly start working on the commission.

I can send some WIPS after a while,and minor changes can be done until you're satisfied with you piece.

The wait list:

Those interested in taking a commission slot will be placed in a wait list,and I will do them in order.
there's no penalty for dropping out of the wait list if you can't proceed with the commission by the time
I approach you to tell that I can start working on it. that said,I prefer do do things at my own pace
and carefully,so be aware of that if you consider yourself impatient. hopefully we can sort things out.

please use this journal or notes to tell me if you want to be part of the list,or want to drop out of it.

COMMISSION WAIT LIST:

 darksword-wolf
 sintael
 darkwolfdemon

I'll approach each one individually,and progress and/or theme of the submission will be updated here.
if you have any questions,feel free to ask. thank you.

Yes: FA died for the 147th time,but this journal isn't about that:
It's been several months since my last journal,so I decided to type in some words. 2019 was an overall pretty good
year for me,for many reasons. but it wasn't PERFECT,since a lot of people turned their backs against me and even stabbed
mine,because of that,I was unable to trust and connect with people for quite some time,
and even left all the discord servers I was part of,for no good reason.
it was an year that I achieved many things,but also the one that I least spoke to others.
Thankfully,I came across some new people that are pretty much SAINTS,and they supported me a lot.
and it's not an exaggeration to say that they 'saved' me.
honestly:leaving the artist community for good crossed my mind,
but thanks to them,that didn't happen.

But! I'm glad to say that things are OK now,and my situation is rather stable.
I did run into a minor problem last month because of a commissioner
that ran away after I made some considerable progress on his commission,
and this caused me to open an YCH that you may,or may not know about,in order
to get the money that I was counting on,quickly. I'm glad that worked out well--even better than I expected,even.
Many thanks to Sintael,who claimed it.

so,now what? well:I plan on doing some personal projects,including a new character.(She's very unusual and cool,I swear!)
and then I'll make a price sheet (FINALLY) and should start taking regular commission slots next month,and they will
be all done 'in public' and in order to avoid the situation I mentioned before.
so yeah,I think that's about it. thank you very much for reading all this. see you around,and take care.

Oh yeah,I'M REALLY FEELING IT! (about time,right?) I'm not going to type enormous texts this time,
but I've learned a couple of really useful things while I was absent from here. and now I'm way less salty.

so yeah,again:I'm doing alright. and as of right now,I'm taking commissions 'manually' by approaching the people
that wanted one by PMs,one at a time. slowly but surely I'm getting by. as always,your patience is greatly appreciated.

that's all for now. take care.

Hey. thought I was dead? or just forgot I existed? no matter,really.

I'm done with my "personal art projects" for now. sure,there are still things that I wanted to do,
but I don't mind doing them in the future. can't complain.

however,as I'm typing this,I feel very tired and stressed. absolutely not in the mood for talking and most certainly
NOT in the mood for drawing anything in a while. Let's call it yet another break--yeah,whatever.

once I'm good to go I'll take any commissions that anyone might still be interested in getting from me.
apologies for taking so long (again),the "human factor" truly screws everything up. that's all for now,bye.

Well...I sure took my time,but decided to make a twitter,after all.

I mentioned on it:but I think it's good to have a backup account,and there
are some people that don't like using FA and asked me to do it,so...well,there it is.

====================

https://twitter.com/raznarchy

====================

"razplus" and "raz+" were already taken,so "Raznarchy" it is.
also,yeah:I am alive as you can see. but still very very busy.

so,as always: your patience is greatly appreciated. see ya~

Heya. People have been asking me for commissions a couple of times during the past months,
and I'm starting to feel bad for always saying "not yet" or simply turning them down.(sometimes more than once.)
and well,it's not like I don't need any money:it's just that I like to do things at my own pace.

that said,I decided to suspend all my personal projects for now,and I'll try to approach the people that have been interested in commissioning me over the past months/years before opening them for the public and then getting back
with the things I had planned on my last journal. so,I'll ask once again for your patience.

I take commissions very seriously,and because of that I barely come by for chatting here or on discord
when I'm working on them. so,I'm sorry if you feel like I'm even more distant and quiet than normal.
it's nothing personal,just busy. always remember that I'm NOT a robot,and there's
lots of things I must deal with every day.

I plan on making a new price sheet,but for now,I'll just type them here. reminder:
COMMISSIONS ARE NOT OPEN YET,THESE ARE JUST THE UPDATED PRICES.
They are based on how much of the character I have to draw and the line/color quality.

===========================================================
cel-shaded: bust = 30$ / thigh-up = 35$ / full-body = 40$

ex:http://www.furaffinity.net/view/27369552/ http://www.furaffinity.net/view/27744898/

soft refined: bust = 45$ / thigh-up = 50$ / full-body = 55$

ex:http://www.furaffinity.net/view/28878664/ http://www.furaffinity.net/view/29176019/

===========================================================

For a character wearing clothes,I can make a nude version for free.
I can also make small edits on the picture until you're satisfied with it.
(like changing the size of boobs,changing the expression,etc.) Paypal only.

If you have any questions,feel free to ask. see you soon,take care.

Well,hello there. how long has it been? 2 months I think...? well,no matter.
as you can see I'm alive and mostly alright. time to start 2019 once and for all.

Personal project plans as of right now:

-A full Zanna picture similar to that one of Rhaja I just posted.
-The sequel to the Wronger Guard comics that is taking this long because I
wanted to include the eeveelutions on it,and as some of you know,I only finished
drawing all of them rather recently. (it's only missing the Mom and Dad.)
-A picture of Ayra from FE (let's call it human practice.)
-2 new pokemon characters that are hybrids. One is a Celesteela+Golurk girl,
and the other is a Glalie+Xurkitree dude. Hope you guys like them.(fusions are fun.)

Commissions and Ko-fi:

It's been a while since I officially opened commissions,but every now and then there's
people that ask me for one by notes or Discord. and that said,I'm working on one right now.
once I'm done with it,I might open them properly,and might adjust the prices,just so you know.

I don't plan on making a Patreon (at least,not right now) because of my volatile art pace,
but my Ko-fi page exists,and once I'm a bit more free,I plan on giving some rewards for those
that support me there. (but as of right now, must confess it's pretty much just a tip jar.)
still,any help is welcome. thank you. https://ko-fi.com/razplus

Permission for characters:

You may draw or ask someone else to draw ANY of my characters without asking me. --even if it includes
nudity. As for things that involve sexual interaction,I'd rather be consulted first,but I'm not usually
against the idea,unless it's with Lucille Lilac or the underage characters like Jolie and Niniya.)

Closing comments:

I think that's it for now,if you have anything to ask or comment,just let me know.
I'll try to reply whenever I can. see you~

Uh... hey. It's been a little while I guess?! but anyways...
I deleted my Tumblr last week. not sure how things are there right now,but then again:I don't care.

I haven't created a twitter like the rest of the world because FA works just fine for me.
sure:I could get more exposure and popularity elsewhere. but by not going,I get more FREE TIME!
maybe I'll finally be able to...TALK TO PEOPLE. Oh my! A man can dream,right?
so,there you have it~ Give me a big hug and don't let me go,okay?!

======================================================

I've finished the commissions that I've been working on lately,and now I'm going to take a small
break because of the holidays and because it's summer where I live,and the heat is KILLING ME.

ahhh...help... I'm MELTING! so..anyway,I might do 1 or 2 small personal projects before
next year,since there will be no responsibility and deadlines involved,but I guess that's it for now.
sorry if none of this is particularly exciting...but still,and as always: thanks for sticking around. see ya~

Starting today,I'll take a break from my personal projects and will start working
on commissions. I gotta update the prices first though,and I am still working on
one that I got on Tumblr. so: I won't take more slots RIGHT NOW--but soon enough.

I also created a Ko-fi account (like LITERALLY everyone else) just in case someone
likes what I do,and is feeling rather altruistic at the moment. thanks for your time.

http://ko-fi.com/razplus

I'll bring more news in a few days,hope you guys stay around. bye~

Hello to anyone reading this. I'm alive and doing mostly alright,by the way.

however,I'm still on a "break" of sorts,and there still some small things that must
be taken care of before I start doing anything more serious,such as commissions.

meanwhile,would you like to vote on which non-pokémon character of mine
you like the most? here's the link for it:

https://www.strawpoll.me/16754923

This poll has been around Tumblr for a few days,since I kinda wanted
to see which characters are more popular there,and which ones are more
popular here. But now we'll see which one is the TRUE WINNER! (just for the sake of curiosity,really...)

anyway..that's all for now. see ya~

Hey,look: I'm alive. yay. I'm really tired though,so I'll get some rest in a while...

I managed to finish one of the things I wanted,and now only the Eeveelutions remain.
thank you for your patience,and see you soon!

okay,so...a lot of things happened in the past weeks. first: I was without internet for
a whole week because of an accident that snapped the wires and cables on the street. but now I'm good to go,
and even hired a better and faster internet service.
next up: I started to have a severe toothache and went to the dentist to see
what was happening,turned out a wisdom tooth decided to sprout and pretty much destroyed one of
my molars in the process,so I had to extract both teeth this week. but..welp,I'm alive at least.

still,moving on with life I suppose. now some art related news:

You might already know that I lack a lot of motivation and get side-tracked easily when it comes to drawing,but this
time I decided to make a...LIST. I usually draw whatever I want whenever I want,but now it's time to get serious.

1- I still have some people that I'd like to compensate/gift,this will be my next move.

2- I must finish what I started,so the 'eeveelutions' will come next. all of them.

3- Commissions will be open for good. I've been searching for a job for a long while now,
so,I'm running out of options. I promise I'll try my best to make this work. I need to.

that's all for now. thank you,see you.

Hey...It's been a while. Before I post my most recent artwork,I'd
like to make yet another one of my infamous speeches. One that will most
likely explain my behavior. (but you're still not forced to accept it.)

I know people are here for the art and porn,and I'm never happy to share certain
things online like this,but I can't separate my personal life from my artist matters.
so,I'm going to tell you who I am and what I've been up to ,and hopefully I won't have to make
another text wall so soon,since I'm also tired of typing these so often. TL;DR
"I have depression and sometimes I get cloistered and do absolutely nothing."
If you have time to waste and would like to know more about it,keep reading.

I am "Razplus". I don't have a single ambition or dream,never achieved anything remarkable in my life,
currently unemployed and I can't draw fast enough to make a living with my art. I never finished college,
never had a relationship with someone,can't handle frustration very well,
and I often give up or run away from problems instead trying to fix them.
I also live in constant fear of "making my life worse" so,I don't usually take risks in attempts to make it better.
that said: my self-esteem is very low,and even though I get praised because of my art,it's difficult to
believe drawing colorful furry characters make any difference in people's lives,so I don't feel...needed.
This feeling of emptiness makes me ask myself "why am I still alive anyway?" often,and I thought of these answers:

1- Some people are here to help you and want to see you happy. Killing yourself would cause an emotional scar on them,
and that's no way to repay someone's kindness towards you.

2- Just because you don't see a reason do live right now,it doesn't mean that you won't find that reason
one day. keep looking for it. --there might be more than one,even.

You shouldn't worry about me,no matter how edgy and pessimistic I get,okay?! Good.
Still,over the years,friends abandoned me(with or without my fault.),family members died,and other things that probably happens to everyone at some point. and I became quiet and reclusive so I won't feel much of a difference if people eventually disappear from my life. I know this isn't good...but I'm too scared of getting hurt. so I try to stay
alone as much as I can. ...so,if I don't talk often it's because of this and of course: because I'm selfish,
and only look for social interactions when I'm desperate. I'm really sorry for this...you're free to hate me.
Becoming aware of problems is the first step,now I should try to take some actions,even though I'm not sure where to start.

So,yeah:I just wanted to say that I'm not better than anyone,really.
so you shouldn't put high hopes on me. also,not looking for pity and attention:
I'm only here to spread facts and things I've learned,hoping that someone will understand.

Yo,whaddup? I was too busy drowning in negative thoughts lately (as usual),
so I wasn't drawing and wasn't talking to anyone as well. sorry.

But,I think I'm sorta back,or...whatever. so..yeah. uhh..let's move on.

Uh...Hi. I'd like to say a few things again,but don't worry: it's casual stuff.

Thank you for watching me. To be honest,I don't think I deserve half of the kindness and attention
I receive,considering how antisocial I am. I hardly interact with anyone,and when I do,it's not for long.
I don't usually leave my feedback and opinions around too. and even though I'm aware of these things,I'm not
moving a muscle to change that,since there are some cool people that tolerate my odd behavior,
and are even able to motivate me into drawing. --I'm truly grateful for having them around.

also,I'm sure that there's some people that are able to enjoy the work of an artist regardless of his or her
personality and actions. and I should consider myself lucky for that. so,once again: thanks for sticking around.

By the way,I love Fire Emblem,but it's a bit hard for me to get motivated into drawing characters from it
(and other franchises in general) since there's already so many artists that do that way better and faster than me.
but nowadays I'm slightly more confident,and the idea that I'm not doing something just because of others,almost makes
me want punch myself in the face because of how stupid it sounds. so:while I can't make any promises of what I'll draw
next,you guys should expect more "unusual" things around here. (unusual for my standards,at least.)

Also,in case you want to add me on Fire Emblem Heroes,Here's my ID: 6425054120
I'm a F2P player,but sometimes the RNG goddess smiles at me. (emphasis on sometimes.)
if you add me,my SMOL CORDY will visit your castle and say Hi! so,thank you:see you~