FA+
Shop
Rich poor guy.....
Posted 14 years agoI NEVER thought I'll get in a situation where I make 3 grand a week. But I get a NEGATIVE amount as take home pay.
I been in the negative for one month now.
I won't get into it. I'll just say that if things won't improve in a month. I'll file bankruptcy first....cause nothing say I am so fucked than making a whole lot of money and seeing a "IOU" given to me from the people I am employed with. Or is that contracted? What ever. Either way, it's a shot at TRYING to get the bankruptcy shit that would eliminate most of my debt....not all. But most hopefully.
Then do the resignation process.
Leave.
Maybe shoot myself, I don't know. Either way, 10 years of thrashing about. I would THINK I hit a break by now.
But hey, no one can't tell me I need to try to get into my own business before I knock it. Guess what assholes. I tried it, and so far it's BROKE me. Funny how these people who tell me I should try it are usually the ones who have NOT themselves.
I been in the negative for one month now.
I won't get into it. I'll just say that if things won't improve in a month. I'll file bankruptcy first....cause nothing say I am so fucked than making a whole lot of money and seeing a "IOU" given to me from the people I am employed with. Or is that contracted? What ever. Either way, it's a shot at TRYING to get the bankruptcy shit that would eliminate most of my debt....not all. But most hopefully.
Then do the resignation process.
Leave.
Maybe shoot myself, I don't know. Either way, 10 years of thrashing about. I would THINK I hit a break by now.
But hey, no one can't tell me I need to try to get into my own business before I knock it. Guess what assholes. I tried it, and so far it's BROKE me. Funny how these people who tell me I should try it are usually the ones who have NOT themselves.
Well......not much new.
Posted 14 years agohttp://www.furaffinity.net/journal/2439186/
Reading this just made me shake my head. It's sad what happened here. But call me odd, but what I find even sadder is this idiot didn't even TRY to cover the facts up. Just joked around like as if it's NOTHING WRONG and expected the vets to fix the dog up like as if it was a broken washing machine. Seriously? Are people getting dafter by each generation? Poor dog is going to be put down. It's amazing it lived this long....but way to long for that type of abuse and pain. And this guy.......IF he's really a furry, really damns our image further. I hope there's justice somewhere out of this.
As for me, I am not sure what to say other my life is in the red line for finances. After a month of nothing but trying to get started on this owner operator thing....and only have this truck in the shop over and over again (paid for by the company on repairs...but NOTHING much given to me for compensation), I am officially in the negative this week. Though I got some spare change laying around and some help. SO hopefully next week's paycheck will be a good one. Cause since Friday I been rolling and been racking up miles finally. So we'll see how this goes.
About it on my end.
Reading this just made me shake my head. It's sad what happened here. But call me odd, but what I find even sadder is this idiot didn't even TRY to cover the facts up. Just joked around like as if it's NOTHING WRONG and expected the vets to fix the dog up like as if it was a broken washing machine. Seriously? Are people getting dafter by each generation? Poor dog is going to be put down. It's amazing it lived this long....but way to long for that type of abuse and pain. And this guy.......IF he's really a furry, really damns our image further. I hope there's justice somewhere out of this.
As for me, I am not sure what to say other my life is in the red line for finances. After a month of nothing but trying to get started on this owner operator thing....and only have this truck in the shop over and over again (paid for by the company on repairs...but NOTHING much given to me for compensation), I am officially in the negative this week. Though I got some spare change laying around and some help. SO hopefully next week's paycheck will be a good one. Cause since Friday I been rolling and been racking up miles finally. So we'll see how this goes.
About it on my end.
New Shandra
Posted 14 years agoIt starts tomorrow at this site....
http://unconventional.smackjeeves.com/comics/
So yeah, go there for the latest.
If not, just wait till I eventually update it here.
Just a friendly reminder.
Anyway, I am not in the mood to explain what's happening on my end. I'll just say I NEVER thought having an AC system repaired SIX times would STILL result NEVER lasting AC usage. More on that when I finally calm down.
http://unconventional.smackjeeves.com/comics/
So yeah, go there for the latest.
If not, just wait till I eventually update it here.
Just a friendly reminder.
Anyway, I am not in the mood to explain what's happening on my end. I'll just say I NEVER thought having an AC system repaired SIX times would STILL result NEVER lasting AC usage. More on that when I finally calm down.
So how I been with going into my so called own business?
Posted 14 years agoWell.......50/50.
The up and up?
I make my own routing. I haven't been getting any flack for going my way. Actually, they refuse to give me a routing. Which is okay, since I got a GPS. BUT, I like getting the routing information so I have a good clue on where I will/will not take. And pretty much help me find my path on the Atlas. BUT, then again, since they give me no routing, it means I am not required to follow their SUGGESTED route. So I am happy for that.
Another good thing is I am NOT required to go through the stupid hoops to enter a terminal. Nor am I required to jump through the new hoops they started in order for us to LEAVE the terminal. It's nice to roll in, have them ignore my truck and just check out my trailer. Which is belong to them anyway.
I am not required to have my truck worked on at their shops. It's nice....going some where else to get it done better, and faster.
Each terminal got something nice for owner/operators. Like here in Lithia Springs, GA, the terminal let the owner/operators use this old, beat up pick up truck to do errands in. POS truck, but hey, it's FREE for me to use. I am NOT complaining.
Speaking of things, I still get discounts using the company hotels and facilities. I had to buy a new mirror housing for my driver side mirror when some moron hit it, and I got it for cheaper at the terminal than at the dealership. I just wish they took cash and debit and NOT check or dip into my maintenance escrow.
So far I am not seeing the HUGE paycheck I was hoping. But then again, since my truck had been in the shop for half the month I been an owner/operator and STILL took home enough to pay my bills and even equal to what I make as solo company driver working my ass off with NO down time. I really, REALLY can not complain much. Though it's still annoying that I had days where I was close to broke, only to get paid and get a small amount of hope.
NOW, the bad?
The terminals refuse to do ANYTHING small to help me out. It's the attitude that I am on my own unless I am willing to pay at our terminals. And the worst part is, IF I am paying, they'll still go cheap on stuff. So it's best NOT to our terminals if I want quality parts and work......though I can get quality parts myself and do it on my own....go figure.
The truck is your responsibility, as always. Regardless of being the owner, or a company driver. BUT, as an owner, it really is 100% your responsibility. And getting a lemon right away is the worst way to start into this field as an owner/operator. Guess what I got?
There are drivers out there who make it their point to scoff at owner/operators. Reasons? I have no idea. I really don't. BUT seeing how some owner/operators treat company drivers when it comes to driving like assholes make me feel we done it to ourselves. I mean, shit, my truck still got that "Company" truck look. So I sometimes get owner operators wanting to play a game of, "Let the governed (trucks that can only go up to a set speed, usually 65 MPH) truck pass us, then floor and and leave them in our dust." Only to have them flip me off when they realize I got no governor and I am able to keep up or pass them. So yeah, I can see why a lot of company drivers despise Owner/Operators. Then again, trucking isn't like what it used to be. I started when the "brotherhood" was dying and the "ME" mentality was taking over. I came back this year and find the "ME" mentality have taken full force.
You have way more overhead to worry about. You are NOT working for a company anymore. You are contracted by the company (and locked into if you signed a contract saying you agree to ONLY work for them for a set period of time) to haul their goods. You do NOT have to answer to them other than what the heck you did to their trailer and/or load. So YOU are responsible to take care of your own taxes and what not. Meaning, YOU must set aside taxes from your own paycheck for federal, state, county, and social security. Mind boggling. I let an outside source take care of that. But that does cost me extra. Not to mention I am paying full price for medical. So I went from 50 bucks a month to 200 bucks a month. FUN.
I do NOT get any compensation for down time. As a company driver, if I am broke down for more than the time they feel it should take to get a truck repaired. Like 24 hours. Then I get paid at least 20 bucks, if not, 50 bucks a day. PLUS they pay for a hotel room IF the truck is NOT runnable to allow for heat/ac from the elements. I as an owner/operator don't get that shit. It's all out of my pocket. FUN. That also go for transportation like bus/air fare.
Really, when you jump into the world of private business, you really can't jump in thinking you'll become an instant success. I seen too many people in the past open their own shops, do their own private business. Only to fold, not because it failed, but because they didn't like the fact they were not raking in the money.
Really, NO ONE rakes in the money as a small business. And I still talk to a lot of company drivers at the terminal here thinking I am crazy for being happy that I am able to take home the same amount of money as a company driver in a month. Well, like I said, I been broke down a lot, so taking home the same amount as me being a company driver with NO break down time. Don't that mean I am doing good?
Either way, this month have not been a good start. Picked up the truck here in Lithia Springs with a lot of problems that the terminal here fixed EXCEPT the AC issue. The AC been a bane since I got it. Didn't work. They charged the system. I left, it drained out in a day. I got new AC lines, it leaked out still. Connections was not tightened, recharged. A component in the AC system died, so the system was still charged, but refused to work. Got that fixed. Though I am now leery of it.
The APU (alternate power unit/generator with an AC pump and heater core) was dead when I got it. It was fixed and worked for a long time till Friday when I got the AC worked on for a 4th time. That APU was the only thing I had to help me escape the heat when it was time to sleep. It's got a separate heating and cooling system for the sleeper. So of course when that broke, and me being leery about the AC in the truck. I got that currently being worked on. SHOULD be ready by Monday.
All of this is so far being paid for by the place I got the truck from....which is my company. SO at least I didn't have to pay for anything but a light bulb and mirror housing. And the other issues that came up out of nowhere, like the water pump, fuel pump, and fuel line, was all paid for by my company when it came up. SO, as long they are willing to replace parts and fix things when they come up. I am happy. But sooner or later, it will be 100% my issue. And sadly, I already see an issue I need to work on before next month. And that is one of the drive tires need to be replaced due to uneven wear. Wasn't like that when I got the truck, so it's my issue. Though I COULD try to call that in. Just with all the major emergency repairs topped off with AC issues. I am just tired of this shit.
SO, honestly, the very thing that can break your business when you become a driver for hire is the very truck you are trying to work in.
Ah well, I say the gains I got out of it outweigh the reasons why I shouldn't do this. The only draw back to this so far is the truck itself.
Ah well, I am a hard head. I am not going to give up as fast as I jumped in till I am broke. And to be honest, I got no outlook for the future anymore. This is it, this is all I can see. If I can't be a family man. Then I can at least do something I enjoy and just blindly jump very deep into it till I either make it....or drown. Either way, there's more than one way to live happily ever after. And it don't always have to have that picket fence and a love one by your side.
The up and up?
I make my own routing. I haven't been getting any flack for going my way. Actually, they refuse to give me a routing. Which is okay, since I got a GPS. BUT, I like getting the routing information so I have a good clue on where I will/will not take. And pretty much help me find my path on the Atlas. BUT, then again, since they give me no routing, it means I am not required to follow their SUGGESTED route. So I am happy for that.
Another good thing is I am NOT required to go through the stupid hoops to enter a terminal. Nor am I required to jump through the new hoops they started in order for us to LEAVE the terminal. It's nice to roll in, have them ignore my truck and just check out my trailer. Which is belong to them anyway.
I am not required to have my truck worked on at their shops. It's nice....going some where else to get it done better, and faster.
Each terminal got something nice for owner/operators. Like here in Lithia Springs, GA, the terminal let the owner/operators use this old, beat up pick up truck to do errands in. POS truck, but hey, it's FREE for me to use. I am NOT complaining.
Speaking of things, I still get discounts using the company hotels and facilities. I had to buy a new mirror housing for my driver side mirror when some moron hit it, and I got it for cheaper at the terminal than at the dealership. I just wish they took cash and debit and NOT check or dip into my maintenance escrow.
So far I am not seeing the HUGE paycheck I was hoping. But then again, since my truck had been in the shop for half the month I been an owner/operator and STILL took home enough to pay my bills and even equal to what I make as solo company driver working my ass off with NO down time. I really, REALLY can not complain much. Though it's still annoying that I had days where I was close to broke, only to get paid and get a small amount of hope.
NOW, the bad?
The terminals refuse to do ANYTHING small to help me out. It's the attitude that I am on my own unless I am willing to pay at our terminals. And the worst part is, IF I am paying, they'll still go cheap on stuff. So it's best NOT to our terminals if I want quality parts and work......though I can get quality parts myself and do it on my own....go figure.
The truck is your responsibility, as always. Regardless of being the owner, or a company driver. BUT, as an owner, it really is 100% your responsibility. And getting a lemon right away is the worst way to start into this field as an owner/operator. Guess what I got?
There are drivers out there who make it their point to scoff at owner/operators. Reasons? I have no idea. I really don't. BUT seeing how some owner/operators treat company drivers when it comes to driving like assholes make me feel we done it to ourselves. I mean, shit, my truck still got that "Company" truck look. So I sometimes get owner operators wanting to play a game of, "Let the governed (trucks that can only go up to a set speed, usually 65 MPH) truck pass us, then floor and and leave them in our dust." Only to have them flip me off when they realize I got no governor and I am able to keep up or pass them. So yeah, I can see why a lot of company drivers despise Owner/Operators. Then again, trucking isn't like what it used to be. I started when the "brotherhood" was dying and the "ME" mentality was taking over. I came back this year and find the "ME" mentality have taken full force.
You have way more overhead to worry about. You are NOT working for a company anymore. You are contracted by the company (and locked into if you signed a contract saying you agree to ONLY work for them for a set period of time) to haul their goods. You do NOT have to answer to them other than what the heck you did to their trailer and/or load. So YOU are responsible to take care of your own taxes and what not. Meaning, YOU must set aside taxes from your own paycheck for federal, state, county, and social security. Mind boggling. I let an outside source take care of that. But that does cost me extra. Not to mention I am paying full price for medical. So I went from 50 bucks a month to 200 bucks a month. FUN.
I do NOT get any compensation for down time. As a company driver, if I am broke down for more than the time they feel it should take to get a truck repaired. Like 24 hours. Then I get paid at least 20 bucks, if not, 50 bucks a day. PLUS they pay for a hotel room IF the truck is NOT runnable to allow for heat/ac from the elements. I as an owner/operator don't get that shit. It's all out of my pocket. FUN. That also go for transportation like bus/air fare.
Really, when you jump into the world of private business, you really can't jump in thinking you'll become an instant success. I seen too many people in the past open their own shops, do their own private business. Only to fold, not because it failed, but because they didn't like the fact they were not raking in the money.
Really, NO ONE rakes in the money as a small business. And I still talk to a lot of company drivers at the terminal here thinking I am crazy for being happy that I am able to take home the same amount of money as a company driver in a month. Well, like I said, I been broke down a lot, so taking home the same amount as me being a company driver with NO break down time. Don't that mean I am doing good?
Either way, this month have not been a good start. Picked up the truck here in Lithia Springs with a lot of problems that the terminal here fixed EXCEPT the AC issue. The AC been a bane since I got it. Didn't work. They charged the system. I left, it drained out in a day. I got new AC lines, it leaked out still. Connections was not tightened, recharged. A component in the AC system died, so the system was still charged, but refused to work. Got that fixed. Though I am now leery of it.
The APU (alternate power unit/generator with an AC pump and heater core) was dead when I got it. It was fixed and worked for a long time till Friday when I got the AC worked on for a 4th time. That APU was the only thing I had to help me escape the heat when it was time to sleep. It's got a separate heating and cooling system for the sleeper. So of course when that broke, and me being leery about the AC in the truck. I got that currently being worked on. SHOULD be ready by Monday.
All of this is so far being paid for by the place I got the truck from....which is my company. SO at least I didn't have to pay for anything but a light bulb and mirror housing. And the other issues that came up out of nowhere, like the water pump, fuel pump, and fuel line, was all paid for by my company when it came up. SO, as long they are willing to replace parts and fix things when they come up. I am happy. But sooner or later, it will be 100% my issue. And sadly, I already see an issue I need to work on before next month. And that is one of the drive tires need to be replaced due to uneven wear. Wasn't like that when I got the truck, so it's my issue. Though I COULD try to call that in. Just with all the major emergency repairs topped off with AC issues. I am just tired of this shit.
SO, honestly, the very thing that can break your business when you become a driver for hire is the very truck you are trying to work in.
Ah well, I say the gains I got out of it outweigh the reasons why I shouldn't do this. The only draw back to this so far is the truck itself.
Ah well, I am a hard head. I am not going to give up as fast as I jumped in till I am broke. And to be honest, I got no outlook for the future anymore. This is it, this is all I can see. If I can't be a family man. Then I can at least do something I enjoy and just blindly jump very deep into it till I either make it....or drown. Either way, there's more than one way to live happily ever after. And it don't always have to have that picket fence and a love one by your side.
I think I should stop caring.....
Posted 14 years agoWhen people drop out of sight.....
What I mean is, there are some people who vanish, only to come back and actually take time to say hello. I got nothing against that. I am cool with that. It's okay, even I vanish.....more than I like to in my line of work.
Now what gets me pissed off is MOST people I know make NO attempt to keep in touch. And then get butt hurt when no one have done the same to them. WELL, you need to give back as much as you take.
Top it off there are some of those that I try to talk to when they had gone quiet, only to be barked at or be treated harshly....or uninterested. Sorry, but if that's how you feel, so don't go crying later on when I stopped talking.....you made me uncomfortable.
Ah well, just an annoyance I wanted to toss out here.
I am also annoyed that people add me, only to go silent. Then again, I must admit, I am guilty of that too.......so I should stop adding people I am not planning to talk to till I get over my fear.....which would be never at this point.
What I mean is, there are some people who vanish, only to come back and actually take time to say hello. I got nothing against that. I am cool with that. It's okay, even I vanish.....more than I like to in my line of work.
Now what gets me pissed off is MOST people I know make NO attempt to keep in touch. And then get butt hurt when no one have done the same to them. WELL, you need to give back as much as you take.
Top it off there are some of those that I try to talk to when they had gone quiet, only to be barked at or be treated harshly....or uninterested. Sorry, but if that's how you feel, so don't go crying later on when I stopped talking.....you made me uncomfortable.
Ah well, just an annoyance I wanted to toss out here.
I am also annoyed that people add me, only to go silent. Then again, I must admit, I am guilty of that too.......so I should stop adding people I am not planning to talk to till I get over my fear.....which would be never at this point.
Well, I am insane....
Posted 14 years ago...so after being bummed out from the last team mate and getting sick of being micromanaged by my company.....I decided to try something stupid. And I say it's stupid cause of the price tag I'll have to pay and the HUGE overhead I agreed to take care of.
Currently sitting in a hotel in Lithia Springs, GA.
Long story short, by tomorrow evening, I'll be an owner/operator of my own tractor. I hope I didn't mess up here. Then again, I am so tired of trying to swim up when I am sinking in debt that I decided to why not fall all the way down in that pit. After all, when you EVENTUALLY hit the bottom, no where else to go but up, yes?
SO far, I love the contract I got with the company. And the MAIN thing I want out of this is pretty much state clearly in the contract. My relationship with Werner Enterprises is NOT a master/slave, employee/employer. I have the right to reject loads, and the right to route myself anyway I choose. Along with what I want to do with the truck, etc, etc......either way, it's that damn freedom I looking forward to. Now I am not going to be stupid and be picky on every load I get. But shit, I will be more than happy to reject loads out of the Jersey City/NYC area. LA in California. And reject those damn KRAFT loads from Champagne, Illinois.....I was banned from there TWICE anyways. In 2006 when I was with Werner, and 2007 when I was with Marten. I been there again around February this year.......they were not happy. But at least I wasn't banned.....again. But that place.....well.....I'll just say they are masochist truckers from a by gone era turned managers. Oh what most of us like to call them, "Super Truckers".
I am looking at all the positives, while trying not to worry about all the negatives and the LARGE possibility I could fail faster than being a company driver when it comes to just making money.
NOW, as for what I had been doing prior to this since the last journal?
I was out of work for nearly two weeks as I waited for ANOTHER team mate to pick me up. When I got picked up, the guy had an 06 Peterbilt.....something way too old to be used as a team truck. BUT, it's a hard worker, so I was not complaining. And it was the short nose one, so it was easy to work with. The guy, really nice guy despite being a gruff Biker who looked like (and probably was, he wouldn't specify other than 'hint') he was a Hells Angel. But unlike the last team mate who was a smart kiss ass young kid who thinks the world should be considerate towards him. I got an older man around my Dad's age who was very straight forward while still have a sense of humor and WORKED. Fuck, my dispatcher was actually upset that I was switching divisions. And my last week on that truck he told me I went from being under productive with my last co-driver to OVER productive. And honestly, I see it. I mean, shit, we were in Lynchburg, VA on Thursday, had a load going straight to Vernon, California. Got there Saturday. Then immediately got a load to Summerville, SC, got there on on Monday. And we got to our destinations HOURS early. Vernon was 7 hours early, Summerville was 2 hours.....would have been 7 hours IF they let us unload earlier than 2 hours prior to unload.
So yeah, about all going on my end. Other than going form Company bitch to "outside" contractor. My only worries is like I said, making sure I get work to afford this venture. The other worry, "I" now have to take care of my own taxes and withholding. What I mean is, Werner won't be taking a w-2 from me and taking care of all the taxes and social security. I'LL be doing that. I am literally considered to be my own business. So it's my problem. SO......I got a lot to learn.
But at least I already got what I need to do for the main functions of my job....just now I need to REALLY learn financing.....other than make money, pay bills, and bank it. Now I have to really learn to put money aside for OTHER bills that comes up once a year, eh?
Currently sitting in a hotel in Lithia Springs, GA.
Long story short, by tomorrow evening, I'll be an owner/operator of my own tractor. I hope I didn't mess up here. Then again, I am so tired of trying to swim up when I am sinking in debt that I decided to why not fall all the way down in that pit. After all, when you EVENTUALLY hit the bottom, no where else to go but up, yes?
SO far, I love the contract I got with the company. And the MAIN thing I want out of this is pretty much state clearly in the contract. My relationship with Werner Enterprises is NOT a master/slave, employee/employer. I have the right to reject loads, and the right to route myself anyway I choose. Along with what I want to do with the truck, etc, etc......either way, it's that damn freedom I looking forward to. Now I am not going to be stupid and be picky on every load I get. But shit, I will be more than happy to reject loads out of the Jersey City/NYC area. LA in California. And reject those damn KRAFT loads from Champagne, Illinois.....I was banned from there TWICE anyways. In 2006 when I was with Werner, and 2007 when I was with Marten. I been there again around February this year.......they were not happy. But at least I wasn't banned.....again. But that place.....well.....I'll just say they are masochist truckers from a by gone era turned managers. Oh what most of us like to call them, "Super Truckers".
I am looking at all the positives, while trying not to worry about all the negatives and the LARGE possibility I could fail faster than being a company driver when it comes to just making money.
NOW, as for what I had been doing prior to this since the last journal?
I was out of work for nearly two weeks as I waited for ANOTHER team mate to pick me up. When I got picked up, the guy had an 06 Peterbilt.....something way too old to be used as a team truck. BUT, it's a hard worker, so I was not complaining. And it was the short nose one, so it was easy to work with. The guy, really nice guy despite being a gruff Biker who looked like (and probably was, he wouldn't specify other than 'hint') he was a Hells Angel. But unlike the last team mate who was a smart kiss ass young kid who thinks the world should be considerate towards him. I got an older man around my Dad's age who was very straight forward while still have a sense of humor and WORKED. Fuck, my dispatcher was actually upset that I was switching divisions. And my last week on that truck he told me I went from being under productive with my last co-driver to OVER productive. And honestly, I see it. I mean, shit, we were in Lynchburg, VA on Thursday, had a load going straight to Vernon, California. Got there Saturday. Then immediately got a load to Summerville, SC, got there on on Monday. And we got to our destinations HOURS early. Vernon was 7 hours early, Summerville was 2 hours.....would have been 7 hours IF they let us unload earlier than 2 hours prior to unload.
So yeah, about all going on my end. Other than going form Company bitch to "outside" contractor. My only worries is like I said, making sure I get work to afford this venture. The other worry, "I" now have to take care of my own taxes and withholding. What I mean is, Werner won't be taking a w-2 from me and taking care of all the taxes and social security. I'LL be doing that. I am literally considered to be my own business. So it's my problem. SO......I got a lot to learn.
But at least I already got what I need to do for the main functions of my job....just now I need to REALLY learn financing.....other than make money, pay bills, and bank it. Now I have to really learn to put money aside for OTHER bills that comes up once a year, eh?
Well......time flies....
Posted 14 years ago....when everything goes on through a fast pace....
Long story short, ran all over the place without paying attention to days going by. Had a co-driver in my truck. SO got a team thing going....
Then yesterday I got to my drop off point for my home time off here in Washington.....I get told to unload all my belongings cause my co-driver requested for another co-driver.......and he gets to drive off with the truck I picked up brand new in Omaha.....
Long story short.....again.....I am in Washington, no truck assigned. All my belongings in my Mom's garage. And I am not sure if I want to quit or stay. I am still employed with the company. Just...in their own words, "It wasn't working out." I guess not, since the guy did a low blow and asked me off the truck without WORKING OUT OUR ISSUES. Only till the day I was going to get off for time off I get booted. THEN I get told what I was doing wrong.
Hey, I can defend myself on this over and over again. But I am out of energy. I am tired of fighting. If he wants to blame me for him doing all the work and I wasn't driving much instead of blaming himself for taking over the second he gets his hours back when I still could finish using my remaining hours. On top disptach giving us shitty runs. Then go right ahead. I'll be that bitch. Just like I am that bitch for everything else in life.....
....I am so sick of being that bitch. But I am also so tired of fighting back when all I get is ignored.
Even my usual thoughts of, "Well, he's in for a shock. Cause soon he'll get the same treatment." But REALLY? Will he? Maybe, maybe not.
I don't want to hate the guy......but shit, that was a super low blow.
I can't help but feel that maybe I am not cut out for life in general. I can't bring myself to back stab anyone and smile like it's no big deal.
Either way, my dispatcher apologised for not letting me know before hand. But brought up a huge point that I agree with. He didn't want to get in the middle. And felt that if he did get involved and let me know BEFORE I got to my home time. Me and my co-driver might get uncomfortable and maybe even get violent.
He's fucking right.......cause usually from a low blow, I get depressed and don't wanna admit that he was an ass hat and "I" am at fault. And yeah, to a degree, it's still MY FAULT. BUT, yes, once I got over it and let that fucker talk and give me a reason to wanna kill him. I would have.
SO, the thing I learned from this is.......I DO NOT WANT TO TEAM. For both my sanity and my will to live outside of a cage. Really, what makes it worst is this company is STILL trying to force me back onto a team truck. And refusing to listen to me when I say I want to do long haul. You guys gave it to me before, you guys STILL offer it on the application. I NEVER signed up for team. And I NEVER asked to be near ONE location. STOP TALKING TO ME LIKE THIS IS WHAT I WANT. And stop talking to me like I AM BRAND NEW. I am not a fucking rookie. I am not new to this industry. So shut the fuck up and work with me. I am tired of bending over backwards and putting my life in danger. Shit.
You know, I feel so low right now that I honestly think a slow death would be nice. Just quit and enjoy life till my body shuts down. All I have to do is stop taking my meds and enjoy cake. Let those sugars build up. While that's happening, hang out with my friends and family like nothing is wrong, but cherish it. I am worth less anyways. But at least I can keep those close to me happy.
Long story short, ran all over the place without paying attention to days going by. Had a co-driver in my truck. SO got a team thing going....
Then yesterday I got to my drop off point for my home time off here in Washington.....I get told to unload all my belongings cause my co-driver requested for another co-driver.......and he gets to drive off with the truck I picked up brand new in Omaha.....
Long story short.....again.....I am in Washington, no truck assigned. All my belongings in my Mom's garage. And I am not sure if I want to quit or stay. I am still employed with the company. Just...in their own words, "It wasn't working out." I guess not, since the guy did a low blow and asked me off the truck without WORKING OUT OUR ISSUES. Only till the day I was going to get off for time off I get booted. THEN I get told what I was doing wrong.
Hey, I can defend myself on this over and over again. But I am out of energy. I am tired of fighting. If he wants to blame me for him doing all the work and I wasn't driving much instead of blaming himself for taking over the second he gets his hours back when I still could finish using my remaining hours. On top disptach giving us shitty runs. Then go right ahead. I'll be that bitch. Just like I am that bitch for everything else in life.....
....I am so sick of being that bitch. But I am also so tired of fighting back when all I get is ignored.
Even my usual thoughts of, "Well, he's in for a shock. Cause soon he'll get the same treatment." But REALLY? Will he? Maybe, maybe not.
I don't want to hate the guy......but shit, that was a super low blow.
I can't help but feel that maybe I am not cut out for life in general. I can't bring myself to back stab anyone and smile like it's no big deal.
Either way, my dispatcher apologised for not letting me know before hand. But brought up a huge point that I agree with. He didn't want to get in the middle. And felt that if he did get involved and let me know BEFORE I got to my home time. Me and my co-driver might get uncomfortable and maybe even get violent.
He's fucking right.......cause usually from a low blow, I get depressed and don't wanna admit that he was an ass hat and "I" am at fault. And yeah, to a degree, it's still MY FAULT. BUT, yes, once I got over it and let that fucker talk and give me a reason to wanna kill him. I would have.
SO, the thing I learned from this is.......I DO NOT WANT TO TEAM. For both my sanity and my will to live outside of a cage. Really, what makes it worst is this company is STILL trying to force me back onto a team truck. And refusing to listen to me when I say I want to do long haul. You guys gave it to me before, you guys STILL offer it on the application. I NEVER signed up for team. And I NEVER asked to be near ONE location. STOP TALKING TO ME LIKE THIS IS WHAT I WANT. And stop talking to me like I AM BRAND NEW. I am not a fucking rookie. I am not new to this industry. So shut the fuck up and work with me. I am tired of bending over backwards and putting my life in danger. Shit.
You know, I feel so low right now that I honestly think a slow death would be nice. Just quit and enjoy life till my body shuts down. All I have to do is stop taking my meds and enjoy cake. Let those sugars build up. While that's happening, hang out with my friends and family like nothing is wrong, but cherish it. I am worth less anyways. But at least I can keep those close to me happy.
Been awhile since I been in Denver.....
Posted 14 years agoWHY the fuck do certain places have ROUNDABOUTS now? For the love of fuck, it's like a cancer in society that won't fucking be cured.
Here, want roundabouts? Please put them on TWO LANE ROADS that are in NEIGHBORHOODS....AWAY from ANY industry traffic that includes truck traffic. Shit, putting roundabouts on 4 lane roads are not only stupid, but most people have no fucking clue that I have NO room to circle around the damn thing with my truck AND trailer. And once again, it's in a fucking industry area where there's heavy truck traffic. Just like in Lacey, WA. Fuck, I want to go to every stupid fuck head who thinks this is a great placement of a roundabout and shoot them in the head. Then place them on the roundabout and see if a trailer runs them over....by accident. Cause really, I got my trailer up on a curb of that damn thing. And this was to go to my company's terminal. WTF?
Also, no one shares the roundabout. They all drive agressively, wanting to be the first before the other. That is NOT how the roundabout works. No one thinks for the betterment of others nowadays. And if there are those, like me, it seems to be rare. More people are more inclined to zoom past you, cut in front of you to show you who's boss, then have them wave the middle finger at you as you read "give peace a chance" on their bumper sticker. Or my favorite, "Jesus Saves" as the curse at you. Yeah, God bless you too, asshole.
ANYWAY, enough ranting.
Last week, home. Seen the doctor, had my meds bumped up. Also visited people at my last job in Seattle. I never thought people really cared or liked me as a guard when I worked at Swedish. Really, it was a good feeling being greeted and talked to with well wishes and letting me know they miss me. Hell, I even got hugged by a few of them. Made me actually feel horrid for leaving.
THEN.......I saw "her" (some of you may know her as Katrina in the James Moore stories), and not only it made me glad I was gone. But there was no polite words or concern for me. It was, "Oh, I thought you left? What your doing back here? Ah, heh, sure, what ev." Then 20 minutes later, came up to me and wanted to talk about HER again. WHEEE, I am not an employee there no more. But I just couldn't tell her to fuck off. Mainly cause I had in the past, and it amounted to nothing (which was good cause it could have amounted to me being fired). But after letting her talk, her clinic called her to get in for treatment or else. So yeah, got to continue to hang out with the others till I ended my visit. I was nearly there for 6 hours. I was not planning to stay for the last 4 hours of that shift. Though the guard and others would have been happy to see me there. Ah well.
And then after that.....went back to work. And drove from Washington state to here in Denver, Colorado where I sit now. Got a load here to drop off here at this terminal. Got my co-driver, FINALLY. He got his stuff in my truck. Though he's staying in his truck tonight till coming Monday morning. Gotta see a person in the office who is off during the weekend to make sure he's now assigned to my truck and he can safely turn in his truck without the risk of being written up as a walk out. Heh.......I love this company....not. Rush, rush, rush, only to sit in wait.....even at their own functions. Spazz.
Ah well, about it.
Here, want roundabouts? Please put them on TWO LANE ROADS that are in NEIGHBORHOODS....AWAY from ANY industry traffic that includes truck traffic. Shit, putting roundabouts on 4 lane roads are not only stupid, but most people have no fucking clue that I have NO room to circle around the damn thing with my truck AND trailer. And once again, it's in a fucking industry area where there's heavy truck traffic. Just like in Lacey, WA. Fuck, I want to go to every stupid fuck head who thinks this is a great placement of a roundabout and shoot them in the head. Then place them on the roundabout and see if a trailer runs them over....by accident. Cause really, I got my trailer up on a curb of that damn thing. And this was to go to my company's terminal. WTF?
Also, no one shares the roundabout. They all drive agressively, wanting to be the first before the other. That is NOT how the roundabout works. No one thinks for the betterment of others nowadays. And if there are those, like me, it seems to be rare. More people are more inclined to zoom past you, cut in front of you to show you who's boss, then have them wave the middle finger at you as you read "give peace a chance" on their bumper sticker. Or my favorite, "Jesus Saves" as the curse at you. Yeah, God bless you too, asshole.
ANYWAY, enough ranting.
Last week, home. Seen the doctor, had my meds bumped up. Also visited people at my last job in Seattle. I never thought people really cared or liked me as a guard when I worked at Swedish. Really, it was a good feeling being greeted and talked to with well wishes and letting me know they miss me. Hell, I even got hugged by a few of them. Made me actually feel horrid for leaving.
THEN.......I saw "her" (some of you may know her as Katrina in the James Moore stories), and not only it made me glad I was gone. But there was no polite words or concern for me. It was, "Oh, I thought you left? What your doing back here? Ah, heh, sure, what ev." Then 20 minutes later, came up to me and wanted to talk about HER again. WHEEE, I am not an employee there no more. But I just couldn't tell her to fuck off. Mainly cause I had in the past, and it amounted to nothing (which was good cause it could have amounted to me being fired). But after letting her talk, her clinic called her to get in for treatment or else. So yeah, got to continue to hang out with the others till I ended my visit. I was nearly there for 6 hours. I was not planning to stay for the last 4 hours of that shift. Though the guard and others would have been happy to see me there. Ah well.
And then after that.....went back to work. And drove from Washington state to here in Denver, Colorado where I sit now. Got a load here to drop off here at this terminal. Got my co-driver, FINALLY. He got his stuff in my truck. Though he's staying in his truck tonight till coming Monday morning. Gotta see a person in the office who is off during the weekend to make sure he's now assigned to my truck and he can safely turn in his truck without the risk of being written up as a walk out. Heh.......I love this company....not. Rush, rush, rush, only to sit in wait.....even at their own functions. Spazz.
Ah well, about it.
So what have I done since I got home in WA....?
Posted 14 years agoVisited buddies I know in Everett, Lake Stevens.....about it.
I closed off my old bank account since it won't do me good in Buffalo. It's a local bank......bought out by a California bank....so I guess it's a west coast bank now. But I am mainly in the east coast now (very close, but not literally there).
I got the tabs renewed on my Jeep plus changed the address to my New York address. So yeah, I am one of those idiots (again) who's got a vacation vehicle in Washington. The Buick....I may have a buddy who's willing to take it off my hands. So I'll have one vehicle again. The motorcycle......trying to figure out a way to get rid of it with as little financial damage as I can soak.
Looking at my room....a lot of junk to toss out. I don't know what to do with it yet..
Monday I plan to go to Seattle to say hi to my old co-workers at Swedish. Most actually call me up to say hi. So I plan to at least stop by a short bit to say hello while I am in town.
Tuesday, see my Doctor. I just started being on medication for my Diabetes when I bailed the state for New York in November. So my Doctor REALLY wants me to come back in to make sure the meds I am on is still doing what it needs to do. Says he don't have me all "figured out" yet. Well.....hope I didn't stall too long. But I am so glad he gave me 3 months worth of meds...and another months worth this month. It might not be the right dose, but it really is helping than nothing at all.
Now, I feel I need to mention this since I know 450 sounds horrid in my last post. I want to make this very clear. When your a trucker, your meals are VERY SPORADIC. What I mean is, I had days where I was able to eat healthy meals 2 times a day (not good as 3, but better than....nothing) and my sugars were either at par or on the danger line. Now, MOST days, I can barely afford a good meal....or have the time. So I had days where I had dangerously low sugar levels than super sweet tea surprisingly was my saving grace.
You can NOT remove sugar from your diet. CARBS is a form of sugar, starch is a form of sugar. Really, I mention this cause the ONLY thing I had before I tested my sugars that night was TATER TOTS. I shit you not. BUT, here's the kicker, tater tots is shredded potatoes, have starch. Starch turns into sugar. Processed tater tots use SUGAR to help with preservation. NOW, add more sugar to help theses things to stick together in balls. Add another layer of sugar for crispiness. Now fry it, salt it, and your done. I bet none of you knew that. Allot of processed foods use crazy amounts of sugar and salts to preserve food. There's a reason why doctors recommend people, especially diabetics to cook their own foods from scratch. A home made tater tot would have way, WAY less sugar and salt than a processed tater tot.
I am a trucker, I have no choice to eat out more than I would like too. I don't have a kitchen on that thing, nor a fridge. And if I could, I can't cause it's a company truck and one of my company policies is they don't want us to install inverters cause they usually cause truck fires to the point insurance companies won't cover it if that was the cause of the fire. So really, I am stuck with what ever I can get my hands on. And if I don't have time and/or money to sit in a dine in restaurant (which isn't as bad as fast food for watching my health), then I am stuck with fast food or anything I can get on the shelf quickly. Like beef jerky and chips.....if that's all I can grab.
So yeah, I get really annoyed when people always say to cut back on sweets when I hadn't had anything enjoyably sweet in a long time. I LOVE sweets, but I hadn't had them And fuck, if I am going to be accused of having sweets, I can at least enjoy the fucking things before I accept defeat. The only thing I have that's arguably bad is Southern Sweet Tea. But like I said, when my sugars are dangerously low, it's going to save me. But you know what, I haven't had any cakes, pies, doughnuts is a very, very long time....and I fucking crave them. So please, lets not go there.
I closed off my old bank account since it won't do me good in Buffalo. It's a local bank......bought out by a California bank....so I guess it's a west coast bank now. But I am mainly in the east coast now (very close, but not literally there).
I got the tabs renewed on my Jeep plus changed the address to my New York address. So yeah, I am one of those idiots (again) who's got a vacation vehicle in Washington. The Buick....I may have a buddy who's willing to take it off my hands. So I'll have one vehicle again. The motorcycle......trying to figure out a way to get rid of it with as little financial damage as I can soak.
Looking at my room....a lot of junk to toss out. I don't know what to do with it yet..
Monday I plan to go to Seattle to say hi to my old co-workers at Swedish. Most actually call me up to say hi. So I plan to at least stop by a short bit to say hello while I am in town.
Tuesday, see my Doctor. I just started being on medication for my Diabetes when I bailed the state for New York in November. So my Doctor REALLY wants me to come back in to make sure the meds I am on is still doing what it needs to do. Says he don't have me all "figured out" yet. Well.....hope I didn't stall too long. But I am so glad he gave me 3 months worth of meds...and another months worth this month. It might not be the right dose, but it really is helping than nothing at all.
Now, I feel I need to mention this since I know 450 sounds horrid in my last post. I want to make this very clear. When your a trucker, your meals are VERY SPORADIC. What I mean is, I had days where I was able to eat healthy meals 2 times a day (not good as 3, but better than....nothing) and my sugars were either at par or on the danger line. Now, MOST days, I can barely afford a good meal....or have the time. So I had days where I had dangerously low sugar levels than super sweet tea surprisingly was my saving grace.
You can NOT remove sugar from your diet. CARBS is a form of sugar, starch is a form of sugar. Really, I mention this cause the ONLY thing I had before I tested my sugars that night was TATER TOTS. I shit you not. BUT, here's the kicker, tater tots is shredded potatoes, have starch. Starch turns into sugar. Processed tater tots use SUGAR to help with preservation. NOW, add more sugar to help theses things to stick together in balls. Add another layer of sugar for crispiness. Now fry it, salt it, and your done. I bet none of you knew that. Allot of processed foods use crazy amounts of sugar and salts to preserve food. There's a reason why doctors recommend people, especially diabetics to cook their own foods from scratch. A home made tater tot would have way, WAY less sugar and salt than a processed tater tot.
I am a trucker, I have no choice to eat out more than I would like too. I don't have a kitchen on that thing, nor a fridge. And if I could, I can't cause it's a company truck and one of my company policies is they don't want us to install inverters cause they usually cause truck fires to the point insurance companies won't cover it if that was the cause of the fire. So really, I am stuck with what ever I can get my hands on. And if I don't have time and/or money to sit in a dine in restaurant (which isn't as bad as fast food for watching my health), then I am stuck with fast food or anything I can get on the shelf quickly. Like beef jerky and chips.....if that's all I can grab.
So yeah, I get really annoyed when people always say to cut back on sweets when I hadn't had anything enjoyably sweet in a long time. I LOVE sweets, but I hadn't had them And fuck, if I am going to be accused of having sweets, I can at least enjoy the fucking things before I accept defeat. The only thing I have that's arguably bad is Southern Sweet Tea. But like I said, when my sugars are dangerously low, it's going to save me. But you know what, I haven't had any cakes, pies, doughnuts is a very, very long time....and I fucking crave them. So please, lets not go there.
Back in Washington....
Posted 14 years agoSo far closed a bank account, paid an overdue tab on my Jeep. Then visited people all day. I would have stayed Friday when I got picked up. But Mom seemed to have a lot of pent up rant towards me that I literally got up and left for the day.
Anyway, I am tired, and I need sleep. That, and I finally got some glucose testing strips since I ran out in mid January and was too broke to buy new ones. Good news, I started the day off with 170....not bad....it's okay.....where I should be at when I go to bed. Not waking up. But okay. NOW.......450....YEAH.....got to get myself back into a safe grove again.
Anyway, I am tired, and I need sleep. That, and I finally got some glucose testing strips since I ran out in mid January and was too broke to buy new ones. Good news, I started the day off with 170....not bad....it's okay.....where I should be at when I go to bed. Not waking up. But okay. NOW.......450....YEAH.....got to get myself back into a safe grove again.
Well......I am surprised...
Posted 14 years agoI am still going to be made to team with a stranger. Sucks.
BUT, they put me on this thing called "Team Werner" which means I am on a "top" board. And those on top boards get NEW TRUCKS.
Long story short, I showed up in Omaha on Tuesday night. Deliver, camp out at the Sapp Brothers across the street. Once I got my hours back Wed, I rolled in. They took that old POS truck I was under, and gave me a brand new truck. Holy crap, driving an old beat up 379 Peterbilt (classic design) to driving a brand new Freightliner Cascadia is two different worlds. I went from having a hard time maneuvering my tractor and trailer around corners and backing to driving a tractor that is so car like.......I am backing my tailers into tight spots I never was able to back into......even with a short nose Kenworth T-600 which I had mostly in the past.
All I can say is, well.....hope the teammate I'll team up with is a decent person. BUT, this truck WILL BE USED for our team up. Omaha says so. Cause they don't give out new trucks unless you been with the company for more than 5 years, a trainer, or a team on Team Werner. SO.......we'll see how this shit goes down.
Other than that, I actually got inspired and some short time to type a little side story. Hope you all enjoy.
BUT, they put me on this thing called "Team Werner" which means I am on a "top" board. And those on top boards get NEW TRUCKS.
Long story short, I showed up in Omaha on Tuesday night. Deliver, camp out at the Sapp Brothers across the street. Once I got my hours back Wed, I rolled in. They took that old POS truck I was under, and gave me a brand new truck. Holy crap, driving an old beat up 379 Peterbilt (classic design) to driving a brand new Freightliner Cascadia is two different worlds. I went from having a hard time maneuvering my tractor and trailer around corners and backing to driving a tractor that is so car like.......I am backing my tailers into tight spots I never was able to back into......even with a short nose Kenworth T-600 which I had mostly in the past.
All I can say is, well.....hope the teammate I'll team up with is a decent person. BUT, this truck WILL BE USED for our team up. Omaha says so. Cause they don't give out new trucks unless you been with the company for more than 5 years, a trainer, or a team on Team Werner. SO.......we'll see how this shit goes down.
Other than that, I actually got inspired and some short time to type a little side story. Hope you all enjoy.
3rd time is a charm....
Posted 14 years agoAnd I was lied to on everything in less than a week from getting out of training and into my own truck. I really don't want to get into the gritty details. But I will say I am in a truck that's sold and I am supposed to deliver to Omaha. But instead I go from Indianapolis to Gainsville, AR. I don't have everything or enough supplies to be on this thing, since I was told I am driving straight to Omaha...not running it like I'll be in it for the long haul. So I got no toll passes...nothing for scales. But hey, I had nothing while in Marten for tolls and scales, so this is not new.
Also, fleet assignments told me I am solo 48 states at Indianapolis, like I was the last two times I worked for them. Only later be told by Omaha (main office) that I am put on a team 48 state. And get this, "They never had 48 states solo." And they ignore me when I remind them I am not new here. So if I want solo, I'll be stuck in a region. I came close to quitting.....no, I will quit once my 6 months is up. Hopefully I'll get a better truck job then or some other job will pan out by then. I promise this time that my time with Werner is done for ever. If I wanted regional, I would have signed on with a regional carrier. They pay better.
Also, fleet assignments told me I am solo 48 states at Indianapolis, like I was the last two times I worked for them. Only later be told by Omaha (main office) that I am put on a team 48 state. And get this, "They never had 48 states solo." And they ignore me when I remind them I am not new here. So if I want solo, I'll be stuck in a region. I came close to quitting.....no, I will quit once my 6 months is up. Hopefully I'll get a better truck job then or some other job will pan out by then. I promise this time that my time with Werner is done for ever. If I wanted regional, I would have signed on with a regional carrier. They pay better.
Florida, the gun shine state......
Posted 14 years agoWELL, it's a joke from a Canadian comedy duo, Bowser and Blue. Then again, I passed by so many gun ranges and gun shows that over filled parking lots in, and around other businesses that it's hard to think "Gun shine" joke to be....funny.
Seriously though, I am in Brooksville. Nice, quiet town.....despite the large dog show happening. I got here Saturday evening. All the hotels were full.......with DOGS. I was lucky to get a room after waiting for 3 hours in the lobby for a clean room to be available. And even then, I just grabbed what was open. A smoking room with two beds.......but hey, it's still a room.
http://springhill.wtsp.com/content/.....es-brooksville
Damn, I actually wouldn't mind going to it if I had my own transportation. BUT, then again, trying to sleep last night with all the dogs yapping and barking angrily at each other and at anything that moves.......I was about ready to kill those mutts. :-P
ANYWAY, so what happened since my last entry?
STAYED in Lithia Srpings, GA for nearly two weeks. That town is just next door to Atlanta, by the way. My internet access at the terminal died while I was there, so I wasn't able to get online to pass the time. Damn snow and ice on the ground kept the terminal on lock down, only taking trucks in (if they can make it through the crappy, curvy, hilly road from the highway to the terminal). But not letting any out till Thursday. Then there was a huge exodus of tractors and trailers leaving our lot. We weren't in a hurry since our tractor was in the shop for a tune up and windshield replacement.
WELL, when it was finally ready to roll in the afternoon. We tried to hook it up to a trailer, damn drive shaft exploded. Well, technically, the u-joints exploded, dropping the drive shaft. That's when the nightmare began.
From Thursday the 13th to Thursday the 20th, my trainer had been in and out of the office trying to either get the damn truck fixed, or get another truck. Along with the shop trying to put blame either on him or me. But thankfully my trainer had documentations about him complaining about the transmission since he got it. The shop replaced the transmission (in Fontana, California) a while back. He's got copies of the repair WITH notes to "check the drive shafts and u-joints, might of wear from last tranny". So it took a week of him fighting with both the mechanic in Lithia Spings, GA, and main office in Omaha, NE to FINALLY drop the truck off his back and give him a new one.
Within this time frame, we were put into a couple of loaner trucks to get SOME work. First loaner truck was WORST than his busted truck. We went to Chicago, IL and back with it and we had that truck written up with problems.......shop looked it over and ended up putting that permanently out of service due to a major oil leak that leak over the clutch brake and thankfully they FINALLY caught or the tranny would have exploded. Second truck was good. But we only went to Agustus, GA with it, then back. After that, we SAT ON OUR ASSES for most of the time as the blame tossing and arguments flamed to an intense heat near the end of our stay in Lithia Springs.
In the end, Omaha called the shop owner to either release the truck and accept fault for NOT finding the issue during the tune up (they should have caught it since THEY did a check up, service). And since the truck broke down WHILE ON COMPANY PROPERTY. Especially NEXT TO THE SHOP IT WAS WORKED ON. Either they release it, or they'll fire the CURRENT shop manager (apparently Werner had gone through 4 sets of the entire shop hands since I last showed up there in 2006).
So, my trainer got a new truck, and the shop manager gave us HELL for it. I never seen such an old man act like a stupid child as bad as he did. But what ever, if he did his job all the time, he wouldn't have to worry about his job and finding ways around things.
So on Friday, we rolled down to Jacksonville, FL. Delivered there, then we drove empty here to Brooksville, FL. Trainer had his home time planned for here a long time ago. Though he admits that if he wasn't on the road since the week before Christmas, he would have delayed his home time to a later date to make up for the WHOLE time he sat in Atlanta. He made next to nothing during that time in Atlanta.
That issue with the truck and the shop is part of the reason I left Werner the second time I worked with them. And I am not sadden, I am disgusted to see that shit is STILL happening. I am a trainee, and I am HAPPY to have that status cause even though I don't make a whole lot. I am on SALARY. Meaning, I get paid 400 bucks a week regardless if I drove more or less than I would have made if I was making the pay rate of 26 cents per mile. So really, it didn't hurt me much other than boredom. But it REALLY hurt my trainer.
I don't know what to do. I am so fed up with life with now that maybe crawling under a bridge to die would be a great idea. But that's life. And with today's economy, there's nothing ahead of us but hardships ahead. So all I can do is fight to keep food in my belly and keep the bill collectors at bay.
Seriously though, I am in Brooksville. Nice, quiet town.....despite the large dog show happening. I got here Saturday evening. All the hotels were full.......with DOGS. I was lucky to get a room after waiting for 3 hours in the lobby for a clean room to be available. And even then, I just grabbed what was open. A smoking room with two beds.......but hey, it's still a room.
http://springhill.wtsp.com/content/.....es-brooksville
Damn, I actually wouldn't mind going to it if I had my own transportation. BUT, then again, trying to sleep last night with all the dogs yapping and barking angrily at each other and at anything that moves.......I was about ready to kill those mutts. :-P
ANYWAY, so what happened since my last entry?
STAYED in Lithia Srpings, GA for nearly two weeks. That town is just next door to Atlanta, by the way. My internet access at the terminal died while I was there, so I wasn't able to get online to pass the time. Damn snow and ice on the ground kept the terminal on lock down, only taking trucks in (if they can make it through the crappy, curvy, hilly road from the highway to the terminal). But not letting any out till Thursday. Then there was a huge exodus of tractors and trailers leaving our lot. We weren't in a hurry since our tractor was in the shop for a tune up and windshield replacement.
WELL, when it was finally ready to roll in the afternoon. We tried to hook it up to a trailer, damn drive shaft exploded. Well, technically, the u-joints exploded, dropping the drive shaft. That's when the nightmare began.
From Thursday the 13th to Thursday the 20th, my trainer had been in and out of the office trying to either get the damn truck fixed, or get another truck. Along with the shop trying to put blame either on him or me. But thankfully my trainer had documentations about him complaining about the transmission since he got it. The shop replaced the transmission (in Fontana, California) a while back. He's got copies of the repair WITH notes to "check the drive shafts and u-joints, might of wear from last tranny". So it took a week of him fighting with both the mechanic in Lithia Spings, GA, and main office in Omaha, NE to FINALLY drop the truck off his back and give him a new one.
Within this time frame, we were put into a couple of loaner trucks to get SOME work. First loaner truck was WORST than his busted truck. We went to Chicago, IL and back with it and we had that truck written up with problems.......shop looked it over and ended up putting that permanently out of service due to a major oil leak that leak over the clutch brake and thankfully they FINALLY caught or the tranny would have exploded. Second truck was good. But we only went to Agustus, GA with it, then back. After that, we SAT ON OUR ASSES for most of the time as the blame tossing and arguments flamed to an intense heat near the end of our stay in Lithia Springs.
In the end, Omaha called the shop owner to either release the truck and accept fault for NOT finding the issue during the tune up (they should have caught it since THEY did a check up, service). And since the truck broke down WHILE ON COMPANY PROPERTY. Especially NEXT TO THE SHOP IT WAS WORKED ON. Either they release it, or they'll fire the CURRENT shop manager (apparently Werner had gone through 4 sets of the entire shop hands since I last showed up there in 2006).
So, my trainer got a new truck, and the shop manager gave us HELL for it. I never seen such an old man act like a stupid child as bad as he did. But what ever, if he did his job all the time, he wouldn't have to worry about his job and finding ways around things.
So on Friday, we rolled down to Jacksonville, FL. Delivered there, then we drove empty here to Brooksville, FL. Trainer had his home time planned for here a long time ago. Though he admits that if he wasn't on the road since the week before Christmas, he would have delayed his home time to a later date to make up for the WHOLE time he sat in Atlanta. He made next to nothing during that time in Atlanta.
That issue with the truck and the shop is part of the reason I left Werner the second time I worked with them. And I am not sadden, I am disgusted to see that shit is STILL happening. I am a trainee, and I am HAPPY to have that status cause even though I don't make a whole lot. I am on SALARY. Meaning, I get paid 400 bucks a week regardless if I drove more or less than I would have made if I was making the pay rate of 26 cents per mile. So really, it didn't hurt me much other than boredom. But it REALLY hurt my trainer.
I don't know what to do. I am so fed up with life with now that maybe crawling under a bridge to die would be a great idea. But that's life. And with today's economy, there's nothing ahead of us but hardships ahead. So all I can do is fight to keep food in my belly and keep the bill collectors at bay.
Well......
Posted 14 years agoAtlanta...let alone the state of Georgia, Alabama, and Arkansas don't seem to know how to plow snow. Let alone have the equipment and/or know know. Shit, Atlanta was the worst. Fucking idiots got allot of snow plows, yet instead of having the leader going on either a far right or far left, and have others follow behind him in other lanes to knock the snow off the roads nicely. The GA cops SHUT DOWN THE HIGHWAYS to have 4 snow plows.......run around in circles. IT was filled with sand and salt....and NOT DUMPING IT. Really, this is pathetic. And Alabama and Arkansas didn't bother putting dirt and salt down. Shit, they used road graters. Those fucking things don't touch the ground. So all they did was smooth out the snow into a nice path that eventually turned into deadly ice sheets.
And I get a trainer who's cool....but is NUTS on driving on it. Whee......fuck.
Other than that, sitting in Atlanta at our terminal, waiting for our truck to get serviced after a whole fucking day of just sitting at a stand still in allot of areas.
And I get a trainer who's cool....but is NUTS on driving on it. Whee......fuck.
Other than that, sitting in Atlanta at our terminal, waiting for our truck to get serviced after a whole fucking day of just sitting at a stand still in allot of areas.
Well, here I go again....
Posted 14 years agoI am waiting for a van to get me from this hotel to my company terminal. I was only here for a night, and already I am getting a trainer. Sweet.
So take care all, I'll be rare like I was when I was a driver.....not like that was any different when I was a grouchy security guard.
Wish me luck.
So take care all, I'll be rare like I was when I was a driver.....not like that was any different when I was a grouchy security guard.
Wish me luck.
Finally, a defrost....
Posted 15 years agoAt least for Indianapolis. It's nice to see green. Though there are some spots here and there that still got a thick layer of ice and snow. But, it's good. That, and I do got some things I need to take care of in the garage today. Time to start organizing my junk in there. I left allot of my messy tools and what not that is part of my gear I used while I was in trucking years ago. Going to need them.
Also going to see if my leaf blower still works. I doubt Werner will let me store a half gallon of fuel/oil mix in my storage space under my bed along with the leaf blower like Marten let me do when I was with them. WHY would I want a leaf blower on a truck? It's easier to blow all the dust and shit out of a trailer than either 1, use a broom. Or 2, find a truck wash. And believe it or not, there's many times I get a load that ask for us to clean it out, and the nearest truck wash from me is 300 miles in the OPPOSITE direction of the customer. So yeah, that's why I use a leaf blower.
I am hoping to also find my crowbar. I haven't used my crowbar since I last worked with Werner cause Marten only used Refrigeration trailers. Why? Refrigeration trailers use metal floors. There were rare times I used crowbar to remove wood chunks from between the drain ditches on the floor. But usually you can use anything to remove wood chunks. BUT, for regular trailers, like with Werner, they are wooden floors. And allot of customers (which I do appreciate) would sometimes nail braces onto the floor and make frames for their loads. Usually for barrels. The thing that annoys me is sometimes, they don't fully remove the nails. Or even the frames. And I am stuck needing to remove all that shit. SO a crowbar becomes your best friend. Especially when you are no where near a drop yard or terminal to swap trailers with another empty to grab your next load.
I know I am rambling. I can replace allot of these things if I have to. BUT, well......if I can find these items I had. I won't have to spend a dime. I got my electric ice chest here, found them already. Got my CB radio in a box. I did found my CB antennas out in the garage when we were going out a few times (wow, these guys still use the garage to park their cars still. I am impressed). If I can find my booklet of directions I wrote down for some of our customers I been too. Then that would also help. So much to look for.
I got only one question for you people. Anyone know a VERY good affordable GPS? Something I can program multiple stops with? I got a Magellan, and it sucks. Though it does multiple stops just fine. But nowhere near as good as my old Lowrence I-Way. That GPS no longer supported and can't get a signal to use it. Plus the maps are super old. But that thing was smooth, easy to use. Easy to add many multi-stops. And all around responsive. And the multi-stop is good cause I used to plan my route from where I sat straight to the customer. With planned rest points placed on it. Then when I got to the customer, I would route it correctly to the directions given to me from the customer and/or around trouble areas where my Trucker's Atlas have told me to avoid due to low hangings and/or restrictions. My Magellan not only is unresponsive at times. BUT I notice after 4 hours of straight use (in my car, never used it in a truck yet), the damn Windows CE crashes and loses EVERYTHING.
Ah well, I am rambling. I need to buy a crappy jacket I don't mind losing. Possibly some boots. Some Jogging pants for multi-purpose stuff. Like either for comfort in my rig or as long johns. Then some good sandals. Cause on long drives, regardless of what your driving. Letting your feet breath is a good thing. As long the sandals are the type that is strapped to your feet so it won't slip off, it's good. And I wear sandals allot in the truck while driving. Only to swap to the boots when I need to get out onto a puddle of mud.
Ah well, I better stop rambling for now.
Also going to see if my leaf blower still works. I doubt Werner will let me store a half gallon of fuel/oil mix in my storage space under my bed along with the leaf blower like Marten let me do when I was with them. WHY would I want a leaf blower on a truck? It's easier to blow all the dust and shit out of a trailer than either 1, use a broom. Or 2, find a truck wash. And believe it or not, there's many times I get a load that ask for us to clean it out, and the nearest truck wash from me is 300 miles in the OPPOSITE direction of the customer. So yeah, that's why I use a leaf blower.
I am hoping to also find my crowbar. I haven't used my crowbar since I last worked with Werner cause Marten only used Refrigeration trailers. Why? Refrigeration trailers use metal floors. There were rare times I used crowbar to remove wood chunks from between the drain ditches on the floor. But usually you can use anything to remove wood chunks. BUT, for regular trailers, like with Werner, they are wooden floors. And allot of customers (which I do appreciate) would sometimes nail braces onto the floor and make frames for their loads. Usually for barrels. The thing that annoys me is sometimes, they don't fully remove the nails. Or even the frames. And I am stuck needing to remove all that shit. SO a crowbar becomes your best friend. Especially when you are no where near a drop yard or terminal to swap trailers with another empty to grab your next load.
I know I am rambling. I can replace allot of these things if I have to. BUT, well......if I can find these items I had. I won't have to spend a dime. I got my electric ice chest here, found them already. Got my CB radio in a box. I did found my CB antennas out in the garage when we were going out a few times (wow, these guys still use the garage to park their cars still. I am impressed). If I can find my booklet of directions I wrote down for some of our customers I been too. Then that would also help. So much to look for.
I got only one question for you people. Anyone know a VERY good affordable GPS? Something I can program multiple stops with? I got a Magellan, and it sucks. Though it does multiple stops just fine. But nowhere near as good as my old Lowrence I-Way. That GPS no longer supported and can't get a signal to use it. Plus the maps are super old. But that thing was smooth, easy to use. Easy to add many multi-stops. And all around responsive. And the multi-stop is good cause I used to plan my route from where I sat straight to the customer. With planned rest points placed on it. Then when I got to the customer, I would route it correctly to the directions given to me from the customer and/or around trouble areas where my Trucker's Atlas have told me to avoid due to low hangings and/or restrictions. My Magellan not only is unresponsive at times. BUT I notice after 4 hours of straight use (in my car, never used it in a truck yet), the damn Windows CE crashes and loses EVERYTHING.
Ah well, I am rambling. I need to buy a crappy jacket I don't mind losing. Possibly some boots. Some Jogging pants for multi-purpose stuff. Like either for comfort in my rig or as long johns. Then some good sandals. Cause on long drives, regardless of what your driving. Letting your feet breath is a good thing. As long the sandals are the type that is strapped to your feet so it won't slip off, it's good. And I wear sandals allot in the truck while driving. Only to swap to the boots when I need to get out onto a puddle of mud.
Ah well, I better stop rambling for now.
Hehe.....
Posted 15 years ago....my brother-in-law side of the family are very nice. Though if not a bit.......suburbanite like. It's probably one of the few moments I think me and my sister actually equally feel out of place in. Especially with the constant bible reading and acting out scenes of the birth of Christ and....well....the manger, the 3 kings, and what not. Hehehe, thankfully, since they all are a bit passive aggressive, I don't have to work hard to convince them to just let me sit and watch instead of participate as a camel for one of the kids.
Don't get me wrong, I don't hate children to the point I wanna get a baseball bat to scare them away. I actually got along with the older kids as a friend or an associate on an "adult" level. But I am not going to be a "daddy" and give horse back riding on my back or babysit.
I guess I am not cut out to be a parent. Maybe an uncle. But defiantly not a Daddy. Oddly enough, I used to think I could be a Dad. But honestly, not really. I think I would make a good relative, at least. I guess it pays never having sex. Brings my chances of an accidental child down to a null. Though if I ever had a child, IF, IF I had a child. I would give it my best shot. But till then.....uh....no. So I guess this would complicate things if I had a GF who's got kids. I guess it all depends on situations when it comes up.
I got side tracked. But the point is, I just felt out of place. Though everyone welcomed me like last time I was there for their Christmas gathering (2005). And oddly enough, everyone remembers me. Even the kids. Except the youngest, who was only 4 years old 5 years ago.
I felt bad for laughing at one point when my brother in-law and sister was asked, "When your having kids?" My brother in-law answered "Soon". My sister said at the same time, "NEVER". Then I got weird looks when I was cracking up. But then again, I was then put on the spot by my sister with, "See, I am not the only one who feels kids aren't important."
I swear, I think our parents dreams of grand children are dead on both of their kids. Hell, even with my half sister for my Father's dreams of at least one of his 3 kids would have kids. Meh.
Family..........not for everyone. But needed in this world or society would crumble.
Ah well, at least I didn't have one person ranting about their sad life. Then again, I kept my mouth shut.
Oh, and it's fucking cold. Still got a foot of harden snow here in Indianapolis. I guess it's the same for most of the midwest. I am guessing. When I left Allentown, PA, it was clear, green and grassy (and fucking freezing....but no where near as cold as....say....Minnesota). But once we got further east, snow covered grounds. Pretty much from Pittsburgh, PA to Indianapolis, snow covered ground.
Ah well, I better sleep.
Don't get me wrong, I don't hate children to the point I wanna get a baseball bat to scare them away. I actually got along with the older kids as a friend or an associate on an "adult" level. But I am not going to be a "daddy" and give horse back riding on my back or babysit.
I guess I am not cut out to be a parent. Maybe an uncle. But defiantly not a Daddy. Oddly enough, I used to think I could be a Dad. But honestly, not really. I think I would make a good relative, at least. I guess it pays never having sex. Brings my chances of an accidental child down to a null. Though if I ever had a child, IF, IF I had a child. I would give it my best shot. But till then.....uh....no. So I guess this would complicate things if I had a GF who's got kids. I guess it all depends on situations when it comes up.
I got side tracked. But the point is, I just felt out of place. Though everyone welcomed me like last time I was there for their Christmas gathering (2005). And oddly enough, everyone remembers me. Even the kids. Except the youngest, who was only 4 years old 5 years ago.
I felt bad for laughing at one point when my brother in-law and sister was asked, "When your having kids?" My brother in-law answered "Soon". My sister said at the same time, "NEVER". Then I got weird looks when I was cracking up. But then again, I was then put on the spot by my sister with, "See, I am not the only one who feels kids aren't important."
I swear, I think our parents dreams of grand children are dead on both of their kids. Hell, even with my half sister for my Father's dreams of at least one of his 3 kids would have kids. Meh.
Family..........not for everyone. But needed in this world or society would crumble.
Ah well, at least I didn't have one person ranting about their sad life. Then again, I kept my mouth shut.
Oh, and it's fucking cold. Still got a foot of harden snow here in Indianapolis. I guess it's the same for most of the midwest. I am guessing. When I left Allentown, PA, it was clear, green and grassy (and fucking freezing....but no where near as cold as....say....Minnesota). But once we got further east, snow covered grounds. Pretty much from Pittsburgh, PA to Indianapolis, snow covered ground.
Ah well, I better sleep.
Merry Christmas All.
Posted 15 years agoWell, I am fully back into Werner again. Got my ID, my old employee number. And all the safety crap online popping up demanding me to finish them since they been "ignored" since I left in November 2006. Whee! But they fixed it and I did the current quarter safety meeting. And pretty much got myself squared away for getting a trainer to give me about 100 hours worth of drive time with poor guy to be in passenger seat to make sure I don't mess up as I re-learn how to operate a tractor trailer.
SADLY, the majority of drivers are going to be off for both Christmas and New Years. So to my surprise, Werner actually offered to pay for my trip home for the holidays.
SO, I told them to please send me to Indianapolis, Indiana so I can visit my sister and what not. Then on January 3rd, just show up at their terminal there that's not too far from my sister's place (I prefer the Indy Terminal....or any terminal than Allentown, PA....I hate that terminal).
So after 14 hours on a bus, I made it here in Indianapolis. And since Werner paid for the bus ticket, I know they expect me to return (or I'll get a bill later).
So yeah, so far my THIRD time with them have been decent. But we'll see once I start the grind on the 3rd. At least I got paid for this week.
SADLY, the majority of drivers are going to be off for both Christmas and New Years. So to my surprise, Werner actually offered to pay for my trip home for the holidays.
SO, I told them to please send me to Indianapolis, Indiana so I can visit my sister and what not. Then on January 3rd, just show up at their terminal there that's not too far from my sister's place (I prefer the Indy Terminal....or any terminal than Allentown, PA....I hate that terminal).
So after 14 hours on a bus, I made it here in Indianapolis. And since Werner paid for the bus ticket, I know they expect me to return (or I'll get a bill later).
So yeah, so far my THIRD time with them have been decent. But we'll see once I start the grind on the 3rd. At least I got paid for this week.
Eastward bound.....
Posted 15 years agoAgain...
Well, going to be heading to Allentown, PA. Once everything goes to plan, hopefully, I'll be working.
So once again, I'll be rare online.....let alone rare in real life. SO, take care all. I'll be randomly lurking. Then again, I lurk allot anyways. Though I was well informed and up to the minute. Now it's, "Who, what where?"
Well, going to be heading to Allentown, PA. Once everything goes to plan, hopefully, I'll be working.
So once again, I'll be rare online.....let alone rare in real life. SO, take care all. I'll be randomly lurking. Then again, I lurk allot anyways. Though I was well informed and up to the minute. Now it's, "Who, what where?"
Woot, 3rd time should be a charm.
Posted 15 years ago.....or the death of me.
Well, desperate for money (and a mental well being), I re-applied to Werner on Wednesday along with other applications and resumes sent.
Thursday, I get a call from Werner, REALLY wanting to get me to their nearest Terminal in Allentown, Pennsylvania for Monday's orientation.
WELL, in case no one knows, I worked with Werner on and off since 2005. First time I was full of eagerness and....well.....full of hope. Going to get work, going to see the country. And I NEVER dreamed I'll be leaving Washington state....EVER. Yeah, I was working for a company based out of Omaha, Nebraska. But I was sure I can be back, since my home address was back home. Just hop on a Greyhound to Portland, Oregon, sit in their terminal for Orientation. Then spend months training first in Ontario, California, then just cross country. Chicago, Illinois was as far as we went east.
I think that's where I started to get jaded....more so than usual. Cynical with the work force and the labor laws and how it's supposedly enforced, but in reality just there as a guide line. NO ONE gives a shit if you need to be home. NO ONE gives a shit you miss your friends, family, your own room next to a toilet and shower. NO ONE CARES. And you eat and sleep for the load. It's a life that I was clued in for. But I...must admit I wasn't ready for at the time. I broke down once I was off of training and started on my own.
Long story short, I left, angry, broke, and more into debt. And stranded at my sister's place in Indianapolis, Indiana. Tried to work there for a year. Job after job came and went faster than I could even remember faces and names. I went back with Werner again. Cause I didn't have a year of driving under my belt. And they where the only ones in trucking willing to hire me (other than Swift....but really......WHICH is the lesser of two evils?). So I didn't live far from their Indianapolis terminal. I drove back and forth for orientation. Then I got into re-training and drove. Lasted till I became a trainer. Then back to the same bullshit, I left. Though that time, I had a way back home to Washington state. Mainly due to
mikefurry giving me a plane ticket. I really appreciate that.
Last time I worked with them, late 2006.
Now here I am, nearly in the same boat again. Though this time I gave up on living in Washington State. I miss it, it's my home for most of my life. But I am starting a new life here in Buffalo, NY. I am not the same brat that wishes to be back home anymore. Though I will admit, it's been kinda nerve pinching trying to get used to being a pedestrian again. Last time I walked around everyone without a car was when I was in middle school in the Philippines. Wasn't till I moved to the US where I got so dependent on personal transportation that I can't help but get scared sometimes walking alone. But meh, it's life, and not so bad. I just need to get used to it again. I mean, shit, I was a foreigner in the Philippines. No knowledge of the language, I still rode the Jeepneys. But I guess when we are young, we are way more gutsy then compared to when we get older.
Anyway, point I am trying to get at is this. I am going Sunday on a Greyhound to Allentown, PA to go through the whole process with Werner. AGAIN. 3rd time. And to be honest, I been crying most of the time since I agreed with the lady on the phone to get me a ticket to Allentown. Though I been finding ways to avoid thinking about it and act like nothing is bothering me. I am not the same forever hopeful idiot who worked with them the first time. Hell, not even the 2nd time. I am walking in scared. Scared it will be the same shit. Scared I'll be fucked again. Scared that I may die behind the wheel cause my diabetes might all the sudden go from type 2 to type 1 and I didn't know it.
Yes, it's only been 5 years. But I changed allot since then. Both mentally and physically. I wasn't diabetic when I started. I wasn't winded as easily as I do now when I started. I can't let these guys fuck me over on money again. I can't let these guys fuck me over on home time anymore. Cause these home times will be used to see my doctor. See my doctor to make sure I am healthy enough to drive. Healthy enough to see tomorrow.
I need work. That's the bottom line. If there truly is a God, and he really does have plans in this crazy life of ours. All I ask is this. If I die, let me be asleep. And please, don't let me take anyone or anything out with me.
Well, desperate for money (and a mental well being), I re-applied to Werner on Wednesday along with other applications and resumes sent.
Thursday, I get a call from Werner, REALLY wanting to get me to their nearest Terminal in Allentown, Pennsylvania for Monday's orientation.
WELL, in case no one knows, I worked with Werner on and off since 2005. First time I was full of eagerness and....well.....full of hope. Going to get work, going to see the country. And I NEVER dreamed I'll be leaving Washington state....EVER. Yeah, I was working for a company based out of Omaha, Nebraska. But I was sure I can be back, since my home address was back home. Just hop on a Greyhound to Portland, Oregon, sit in their terminal for Orientation. Then spend months training first in Ontario, California, then just cross country. Chicago, Illinois was as far as we went east.
I think that's where I started to get jaded....more so than usual. Cynical with the work force and the labor laws and how it's supposedly enforced, but in reality just there as a guide line. NO ONE gives a shit if you need to be home. NO ONE gives a shit you miss your friends, family, your own room next to a toilet and shower. NO ONE CARES. And you eat and sleep for the load. It's a life that I was clued in for. But I...must admit I wasn't ready for at the time. I broke down once I was off of training and started on my own.
Long story short, I left, angry, broke, and more into debt. And stranded at my sister's place in Indianapolis, Indiana. Tried to work there for a year. Job after job came and went faster than I could even remember faces and names. I went back with Werner again. Cause I didn't have a year of driving under my belt. And they where the only ones in trucking willing to hire me (other than Swift....but really......WHICH is the lesser of two evils?). So I didn't live far from their Indianapolis terminal. I drove back and forth for orientation. Then I got into re-training and drove. Lasted till I became a trainer. Then back to the same bullshit, I left. Though that time, I had a way back home to Washington state. Mainly due to
mikefurry giving me a plane ticket. I really appreciate that.Last time I worked with them, late 2006.
Now here I am, nearly in the same boat again. Though this time I gave up on living in Washington State. I miss it, it's my home for most of my life. But I am starting a new life here in Buffalo, NY. I am not the same brat that wishes to be back home anymore. Though I will admit, it's been kinda nerve pinching trying to get used to being a pedestrian again. Last time I walked around everyone without a car was when I was in middle school in the Philippines. Wasn't till I moved to the US where I got so dependent on personal transportation that I can't help but get scared sometimes walking alone. But meh, it's life, and not so bad. I just need to get used to it again. I mean, shit, I was a foreigner in the Philippines. No knowledge of the language, I still rode the Jeepneys. But I guess when we are young, we are way more gutsy then compared to when we get older.
Anyway, point I am trying to get at is this. I am going Sunday on a Greyhound to Allentown, PA to go through the whole process with Werner. AGAIN. 3rd time. And to be honest, I been crying most of the time since I agreed with the lady on the phone to get me a ticket to Allentown. Though I been finding ways to avoid thinking about it and act like nothing is bothering me. I am not the same forever hopeful idiot who worked with them the first time. Hell, not even the 2nd time. I am walking in scared. Scared it will be the same shit. Scared I'll be fucked again. Scared that I may die behind the wheel cause my diabetes might all the sudden go from type 2 to type 1 and I didn't know it.
Yes, it's only been 5 years. But I changed allot since then. Both mentally and physically. I wasn't diabetic when I started. I wasn't winded as easily as I do now when I started. I can't let these guys fuck me over on money again. I can't let these guys fuck me over on home time anymore. Cause these home times will be used to see my doctor. See my doctor to make sure I am healthy enough to drive. Healthy enough to see tomorrow.
I need work. That's the bottom line. If there truly is a God, and he really does have plans in this crazy life of ours. All I ask is this. If I die, let me be asleep. And please, don't let me take anyone or anything out with me.
Ooooookay, this looks familiar....
Posted 15 years agoI been silent about the cub porn crap. And I am still going to keep my mouth shut on it directly. Considering allot of people have said things on both sides that I both agree and disagree. BUT, I rather just not say my stance.
I will say this though. There's too many people who are on the pro cub thing thinking that they'll empty the site out since they are supposedly in the right. You know what? BULLSHIT! The anti-cub crusaders said the same damn thing when they made their exodus. What they hell makes you think YOU are the breath that gives this site life? Honestly.
Also I seen a comment that says, "Out with the new, in with the old." UH......that's retarded. There's a few "new" artist out there that avoided FA like the plague due to allowing cub porn. And FA got a few OLD artist on the site who either didn't care about the cub porn thing. Or are cub porn artist themselves. So really, that's a fucking retarded thing to say. Unless your refereeing to AGE restrictions on joining the site. As far as I know, there's no age restrictions.......just the kids can't view adult rated material.
Either way, we'll same the same influx as last time. Last time it was mostly anti-cub users leaving the site. And more pro-cub porn members filling in. This time it will be the opposite. Either way, I feel this site will survive without the butt hurt pro-cub porn users. Just like the site survived without the butt hurt anti-cub porn users prior.
People, this is about keeping FA going. Not about what ever morals they believe in. There's allot of things on this site that the admins don't like that they allow to be posted on this site. Just as much as there's allot of things the admins ban being posted onto the site. Either way, they been trying for a long time to make this "cub" thing a non issue. But there's a thing called "MONEY". Unless we all are willing to fork over money. We can shut up. And Alert Pay is a merchant that they need to go through to collect donations. So either way, it is unfortunately a lose, lose situation. By banning the only ONE thing that Alert Pay is against in order to keep the site afloat. Shit, I am for it.
And don't get me wrong, I seen some artist who do some (not all) cub porn taking it easy and just finding a new home for their cub porn works. But they are still sticking around. And they actually do other things besides cub porn. Maybe some of these butt hurt ones need to broaden their horizons. I don't know. But take a chill pill. And stop being so selfish. Do you want FA to survive? Or do you just want what ever you want that could jeopardize FA's future all so you can get your rocks off for 5 minutes?
Now, the flip side.
Please, be a bit gracious. Don't go around feeling you have the right to slam the doors on the asses of the pro-cub porn users as they cry, bitch, and moan and threaten (and do) leave FA. Especially those who had the same treatment from them a few years ago when those users left FA due to cub porn being allowed. Show some dignity.
Really, this is not a sports game.
Either way, I am not going to argue about the greatness or evils of Cub Porn. But all I am asking is to please, be civil. And sit back, and try to see the issues. This is not the end of the world. And most importantly. The world does NOT revolve around YOU. So stop being so self centered and think you and you alone are the voice of reason and can make EVERYONE change their world to cater to yours. You can only change yourself, your world withing yourself. Your just a tiny spec in the shadows. And so am I.
I will say this though. There's too many people who are on the pro cub thing thinking that they'll empty the site out since they are supposedly in the right. You know what? BULLSHIT! The anti-cub crusaders said the same damn thing when they made their exodus. What they hell makes you think YOU are the breath that gives this site life? Honestly.
Also I seen a comment that says, "Out with the new, in with the old." UH......that's retarded. There's a few "new" artist out there that avoided FA like the plague due to allowing cub porn. And FA got a few OLD artist on the site who either didn't care about the cub porn thing. Or are cub porn artist themselves. So really, that's a fucking retarded thing to say. Unless your refereeing to AGE restrictions on joining the site. As far as I know, there's no age restrictions.......just the kids can't view adult rated material.
Either way, we'll same the same influx as last time. Last time it was mostly anti-cub users leaving the site. And more pro-cub porn members filling in. This time it will be the opposite. Either way, I feel this site will survive without the butt hurt pro-cub porn users. Just like the site survived without the butt hurt anti-cub porn users prior.
People, this is about keeping FA going. Not about what ever morals they believe in. There's allot of things on this site that the admins don't like that they allow to be posted on this site. Just as much as there's allot of things the admins ban being posted onto the site. Either way, they been trying for a long time to make this "cub" thing a non issue. But there's a thing called "MONEY". Unless we all are willing to fork over money. We can shut up. And Alert Pay is a merchant that they need to go through to collect donations. So either way, it is unfortunately a lose, lose situation. By banning the only ONE thing that Alert Pay is against in order to keep the site afloat. Shit, I am for it.
And don't get me wrong, I seen some artist who do some (not all) cub porn taking it easy and just finding a new home for their cub porn works. But they are still sticking around. And they actually do other things besides cub porn. Maybe some of these butt hurt ones need to broaden their horizons. I don't know. But take a chill pill. And stop being so selfish. Do you want FA to survive? Or do you just want what ever you want that could jeopardize FA's future all so you can get your rocks off for 5 minutes?
Now, the flip side.
Please, be a bit gracious. Don't go around feeling you have the right to slam the doors on the asses of the pro-cub porn users as they cry, bitch, and moan and threaten (and do) leave FA. Especially those who had the same treatment from them a few years ago when those users left FA due to cub porn being allowed. Show some dignity.
Really, this is not a sports game.
Either way, I am not going to argue about the greatness or evils of Cub Porn. But all I am asking is to please, be civil. And sit back, and try to see the issues. This is not the end of the world. And most importantly. The world does NOT revolve around YOU. So stop being so self centered and think you and you alone are the voice of reason and can make EVERYONE change their world to cater to yours. You can only change yourself, your world withing yourself. Your just a tiny spec in the shadows. And so am I.
Happy Thanksgiving all.
Posted 15 years agoYes, eat up and enjoy for those who celebrate this day. Though enjoy life in general for all.
What's up in the northeast?
Posted 15 years agoHehehehehe, well, it's been almost a week since I few over to Buffalo, NY. Staying with a buddy for a bit till I can get on my feet.
So far been trying not to stress out and trying to keep myself occupied in order to stay calm. So far, looking at some ads and cleaning the apartment. Just something to do. That, and trying to show some appreciation for being housed. Hehehehe, it's actually worth it. Nice to see my efforts rewarded. Like, very dirty stove top now looking shiny. Hehehehe, I get amused to easily.
Ah well. So here I am. In the Northeast, USA.
Funny, born in Honolulu. Most of my childhood was in Guam and Saipan. Which is west, west, west of Hawaii. Gone to a boarding school in the Philippines. Then shot east to Washington State in a town north of Seattle for most of my later life. Within that time, one year in Indiana, which is east. Now I am trying for New York state. What's next? France? That is heading east from Hawaii.
Who knows, maybe I'll end up retired in my home state. But that's a pipe dream set on drain.
Ah well, wish me luck all. :-D
So far been trying not to stress out and trying to keep myself occupied in order to stay calm. So far, looking at some ads and cleaning the apartment. Just something to do. That, and trying to show some appreciation for being housed. Hehehehe, it's actually worth it. Nice to see my efforts rewarded. Like, very dirty stove top now looking shiny. Hehehehe, I get amused to easily.
Ah well. So here I am. In the Northeast, USA.
Funny, born in Honolulu. Most of my childhood was in Guam and Saipan. Which is west, west, west of Hawaii. Gone to a boarding school in the Philippines. Then shot east to Washington State in a town north of Seattle for most of my later life. Within that time, one year in Indiana, which is east. Now I am trying for New York state. What's next? France? That is heading east from Hawaii.
Who knows, maybe I'll end up retired in my home state. But that's a pipe dream set on drain.
Ah well, wish me luck all. :-D
WELL......
Posted 15 years agoToday will be my last day with Allied Barton.
Which means I get to re-post my pic of me in uniform.
I'll be popping up to Howloween in BC. Just for a first and last time I pop up out of the blue since....who knows when was the last time.
On the 12th, I'll be heading to Buffalo, NY for a new life. Hope that works out. Despite how I may sound, I am actually looking forward to it.
Which means I get to re-post my pic of me in uniform.
I'll be popping up to Howloween in BC. Just for a first and last time I pop up out of the blue since....who knows when was the last time.
On the 12th, I'll be heading to Buffalo, NY for a new life. Hope that works out. Despite how I may sound, I am actually looking forward to it.
Quick update.
Posted 15 years agoWell, allot of things happened in two weeks. Got a visit from my sis and bro-in-law. Wish I had more time to hang out with them. But it was fun regardless. Today is the start of my last week with Allied Barton. Whooo.....lets see if I can actually finish my employment before I tell them where they can roll over and die in. And I am diabetic now, so trucking is pretty much out of the question till I get this new way of living figured out. About it.
I am still unclear on what type I got. But one thing is for sure, I have a hard time getting my levels under 140...lowest I got to date. Yet I feel so tired. I feel great when I get some sugar junk in. But then I get over 300. Wheeeee........I r gonna die. :-P I am type 2. That's for sure.
Too bad this had to happen now as I am getting ready to move to another state.
I am still unclear on what type I got. But one thing is for sure, I have a hard time getting my levels under 140...lowest I got to date. Yet I feel so tired. I feel great when I get some sugar junk in. But then I get over 300. Wheeeee........I r gonna die. :-P I am type 2. That's for sure.
Too bad this had to happen now as I am getting ready to move to another state.
