01) SOMEONE SAYS 'ARE YOU OKAY' YOU SAY?
Eleanor Rigby (Aretha Franklin)

02) HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOURSELF?
A Walk Through Hell (Say Anything) *WELL WHOOP DE DOO WMP, THANKS A LOT*

03) WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
Everything Sucks (Reel Big Fish)

04) HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
Panama (Van Halen)

05) WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
Hustlin (Rick Ross) *YESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYES*

06) WHAT'S YOUR MOTTO?
Three Minutes Clapping (TWEWY Soundtrack)

07) WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
She Fuckin Hates Me (Puddle Of Mudd) .~.

08) WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
Pretty Woman (Roy Orbitson) *o.O*

9) DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
Cheeseburger in Paradise (Jimmy Buffett) *I like how these are all kinda making sense*

10) WHAT IS 2 + 2?
Down Down Down To Mephisto's Cafe (Streetlight Manifesto)

11) WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
Bad (Michael Jackson)

12) WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
Humming the Bassline (JSR Soundtrack) *I bet there's something deep here, I'm not gonna look for it*

13) WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
Jimmy Was A Race Car Driver (Primus)

14) WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Fuck Her Gently (Tenacious D) FFFFFFFFFFFUCK YEEEEEEAH

15) WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
Point/Counterpoint (Streetlight Manifesto) Skanktastic!

16) WHAT SONG WILL PLAYED AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Volcano (Jimmy Buffett) OH I DON'T KNOW, I DON'T KNOW

17) WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
Last Cigarette (Bon Jovi)

18) WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR?
Good Will Hunting By Yourself (Ludo) 3;<

19) WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
Hey Jude (Beatles)

20) WHAT DO YOU WANT RIGHT NOW?
Super CalifragilisticExpialidocious (Oi-Skall Mates) ...

21) WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
Spiderwebs (No Doubt)

22) WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
Penny Lane (Beatles)

I was putting on my shorts for work this morning when I realized I have a REALLY nice ass.

Like, REALLY nice.

Why is that

Also: http://image.com.com/gamespot/image.....4656_front.jpg

(itt: best games you've never played)

Name: Jason Kennet
Nickname: Fucking Asshole, Faggot, I Wish I Was You
Fursona: Cockatoo
Date of Birth: July 2nd, 1990
Birthplace: Glendale, Arizona
Current Location: Camp Hill, Pennsylvania
Eye Color: brown
Hair Color: brown
Height: 6'0"
Heritage: Polish/Jew
Piercings: My dick for one day. Long story.
Tattoos: Going to get one on MY FACE.

Favourite
Animal: Birds
Band/Singer: Aaron Barrett
Song: Stand Up For Rock And Roll - Airbourne
Movie: Rent
Disney Movie: Up
Disney Show: House Of Mouse
Disney Character: Dug
TV show: 1000 Ways To Die or Family Guy
Color: Green
Food: Pizza
Pizza topping: Sausage
Ice-Cream Flavor: Banana anything
Pocky Flavor: I do not consume pocky because I am not a giant douchebag.
Drink (alcoholic): On a normal night a margarita, on a tough night, a jaegerbomber
Soda: I hate soda
Cookie: Those wafers with the cream in the middle
Store: Walmart (so much fun every fucking time)
Clothing Brand: Ecko or if I'm feeling squirrely Ed Hardy
Shoe Brand: Vans
Season: Autumn
Month: July
Convention/Holiday/Festival: Anthrocon/Valentines Day/Oktoberfest (all free sex passes pretty much)
Flower: Pitcher Plants
Board game: Whatever's in your closet

This or That:
Sunny or rainy: Rainy
Chocolate or vanilla: chocolate
Fruit or veggie: Fruit
Night or day: Day
Sour or sweet: Sour
Love or money: Love
Phone or in person: In person
Looks or personality: Both equally
Coffee or tea: coffee
Hot or cold: Cold as it can possbily get

Your:
Goal for this year: More Art, Album out
Most missed memory: Fucking around with bros back home
Best physical feature: My triumphant penis. Barring that, my beard
First thought waking up: "Chris shut the fuck up"
Hypothetical personality disorder: Probably the fact that I'm too nice
Preferred type of surgery: liposuction
Sesame street alter ego: grover, because we are both different but SUPER
Fairytale alter ego: troll
Most stupid remark: "so wait you're supposed to shoot them" - Me after beating Gears of War
Worst crime: making someone suicide
Greatest ambition: Rock star
Greatest fear(s): the dark and any type of pain
Darkest secret: above suicide mention
Favorite subject: music
Strangest received gift: a box of condoms...at work
Worst habit: pulling on my beard and twiddling my fingers when i walk

Do You:
Smoke: yes
Drink: yes
Curse: Yes.
Shower daily: once every two or three days
Like thunderstorms: fucking yes
Dance in the rain: yes
Sing: it's how i get paid
Play an instrument: guitar and the microphone
Get along with your parents: pppffbbbtt
Wish on stars: once or twice
Believe in fate: yes
Believe in love at first sight: would i be a furry if i said no

Can You:
Drive: yes
Sew: bitch's work (no)
Cook: yes
Speak another language: yes
Dance: at work every day
Sing: surprisingly well
Touch your nose with your tongue: yes
Whistle: yes
Curl your tongue: yes

Have You Ever:
Been Drunk: threw up in a friend's nose
Been Stoned/High: same day
Eaten Sushi: Yes
Been in Love: yes
Skipped school:yes
Made prank calls: yes
Sent someone a love letter: no
Stolen something: yes, every week
Cried yourself to sleep: more than once

Other Questions:
What annoys you most in a person?: when someone just doesn't understand that they're wrong
Are you right or left handed? Right
What is your bedtime? 9-10pm
Name three things you can't live without: my guitar, my friends, and cash
What is the color of your room? white with colorful clothes all over the floor
Do you have any siblings? 3
Do you have any pets? dog
Someone you hate for a million dollars? that made no sense faggot
What is you middle name? robert
What are you nicknames? you asked this already
Are you for or against gay marriage? only if they allow people to protest at them
What are your thoughts on abortion? pro-choice, to an extent
Do you have a crush on anyone? you know who you are
Are you afraid of the dark? DEATHLY
How do you want to die? blaze of glory
What is the largest amount of popsicles that you have eaten in one day? at least 20
Would you take a bullet for the one you love? yes
What is the last law you’ve broken? theft

you wanna fight about it

Apparently, next week, I am scheduled to be Ranger Scratch at Hershey Park.

For those uninformed, here is a picture of Ranger Scratch.

http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1236.....46e8cc.jpg?v=0

So yup. I'm a murry purry furry now. MURRSUITAN AT WORK.

So I get my laptop back today

I guess somewhere in the process of not fixing it at all, they BROKE MY FAN.

My laptop overheats in like five minutes and now they want me to send it in again.

Thanks a lot, Gamesh. You sure do a better job than that American you took an opportunity from. If you're Indian or have ever enjoyed Indian food:

FUCK YOU 3:<

So I'll start posting things next week. I promise.

[1:40:41 AM] Jay says: i found a hundred bucks on the ground, then i looked up and saw that it had saved me from getting my head knocked off by a forklift (true story)
[1:40:50 AM] chibiv27 says: holy shit
[1:40:50 AM] chibiv27 says: XD
[1:40:58 AM] Jay says: is that like getting fucked in the vagina
[1:41:01 AM] chibiv27 says: no
[1:41:03 AM] chibiv27 says: lmao
[1:41:07 AM] Jay says: DAMNIT

I FORGOT HOW TO TURN DOWN THE TV

FABLE II IS SOOOO LOOOOUUUD

"THE HARVEST BENEFACTOR MUST DONATE AT THE HOLY HOUR

IT HAS ALWAYS BEEN SO"

GOD SHUT UP WHAT THE FUCK THIS IS BULLSHIT AUUUUUUUGHHHH SOMEONE TURN DOWN MY TV FOR ME

THIS ENERGY DRINK TASTES LIKE SHIT BUT IT GIVES ME SO

MUCH

ENERGRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

FUCK YEEEEEEEARRRR

GET A PICTURE OF 5000

WIN SOMETHING OF YOUR CHOOSING

I'LL EVEN CUT MY DICK OFF

AND MAIL IT

POSTAGE PAAAID

Street Fighter Natal: Full body motion sensing fighting game

Left 4 Dead 2: Niggers blacks niggers blacks

Crackdown 2: People who jump like blacks

AND THE BEST PART

METAL GEAR RISING: LIGHTNING BOLT ACTION

ONLY FOR THE 360

YOU
FAGS
SURE
GOT
TOLD

You should go see it because it's like the best movie ever.

It's probably my second favorite movie of all time. :(

I cried like three times. It's a very grown up Pixar movie. It even has blood, something that Disney has been EXTREMELY no-no about.

Raddah Raddah Radd Raddah Raddah Radd Raddah Raddah Radd

Raddah Raddah Radd Raddah Raddah Raddaradda Raddah Raddah Radd

Raddah Raddah Radd

Raddah Raddah Radd Raddah Raddah Radd.

AHAHAHHAHAH ENJOY SECOND PLACE, BITCH

Maybe british people aren't as fucking retarded as I thought and can spot a medicore singer. Too bad they didn't do it earlier, rite

almost

dasu dasu

newfag lol chanology

Today I was out walking the dog and I saw this lady at a park bench, and she was crying. I asked her why, and sat down and tried to comfort her. She told me that these punk kids had called her cow and bessie and all these other mean names. She was really really sad.

I hugged her and told her everything would be okay. She looked pretty happy. I hated those punk kids for what they did. Fat girls are girls too you know, and they have feelings like everyone else. What if those kids woke up a few days later and were suddenly 500 pounds? Then I bet they'd feel sorry.

While in my revelry, I turned to find my dog gone. The fat lady had a bloodstained mouth. She ripped her skin off, and underneath was what I had secretly suspected all along...

THE FAT LADY WAS A BEAR.

Quickly I jumped out of the way, and used my bionic arm to toss the bear into a tree. The bear used her strength to tear the tree up. I distracted her with a convieniently placed hamburger, and with a fully charged shot from my longbow, dumped the felled beast into the Susquehanna river.

That's my day today. How was yours?

Well at around, uh, around, uh...uh, around the uh...the around uh...9:15, that's nautical time they use that in ships

Around 9:15 we checked into work baby yes we did, took that card, WHAM RIGHT THROUGH THE READER the defense didn't even DIDN'T EVEN KNOW what sliced 'em

9:30, we suit up as the Reese's Peanut Butter Cup and fuck some shit up oh baby we go out there and start dancing and WHOA SUDDENLY, UH, UH, SUDDENLY, THERE'S UH...THERE'S LIKE 20 FAT CHICKS

Five of them ask to marry

I only say yes to one

...because I was not intoxicated

Half hour on half hour off half hour on half hour off

THEN THERE WAS THIS KID, I'M GONNA CIRCLE HIM, RIGHT...RIGHT HERE, HE MOVED OVER HERE IN THE DIRECTION OF THE ARROW I JUST DREW AND HE WAS POKIN MAN AND HE WOULDN'T STOP, I JUST WANTED TO KICK HIM IN THE SQUIRRELY LITTLE NUTSACK YES I DID

Then I rode some rides and went home to watch some

FOOTBAAAAAAAAAAAA
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AL

WE SHOULD POST SHITTY BANNERS WITH SHITTY SELF INSERTION BULLSHIT.

God bless America.

Today's the day Nek0gami was more prevalent than people who died for your freedom. :\

Sending my laptop in today for

REPAAAAAAAAIRS

Hopefully I will be back with you guys in 5-7 business days~! :3

This new update is bullshit.

WEEEELCOME TO NEW VEGAS!

TRRRRRRRRY YOUR LUCK AT OUR HUNDREDS OF SLOT MACHINES! YOU WANT TO WORK FOR YOUR ACHIEVEMENTS? TOUGH LUCK! IT'S FREE WEEKEND, AND WE GOT NOOBS COMIN IN! LET'S MAKE THE GAME LOOK LIKE FISHER PRICE INCARNATE!

FIRST CHANGE! YOU CAN JUST STAND AROUND TO UNLOCK THINGS! WANNA WORK TOWARDS YOUR UNLOCKS? TOO BAD!~ STAND IN YOUR SPAWN AND TAUNT! UNLOCK! DIE! UNLOCK! UNLOCK! UNLOCK!

BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE

WE KNOW YOU WEREN'T HAPPY ENOUGH WITH ONE SANDMAN,

SO WE'LL GIVE YOU THREE MORE!

THAT'S RIGHT, WE'LL MAKE YOU WASTE YOUR TIME GETTING UNLOCKS YOU

ALREADY HAVE.

DO YOU LOVE US YET? OH, YOU WILL!

SECOND CHANGE! DID YOU KNOW THAT 85 PERCENT OF USERS CAN'T PLAY SAWMILL? AHAHA, ISN'T THAT THE SHITS! WE'RE SUCH GOOD TROLLS. PARTICLE EFFECTS! PARTICLE EFFECTS! PARTICLE EFFECTS!

tl;dr: Fuck you Valve. Fuck you. Fuck you.

Fuck you.

When you give some people an inch they take a furlong?

So to take my mind off of recent happenings and bump my last, sad journal, I present to you...the perfect Maury Show, created by JayKay. All you have to do is circle the answers. It's like Mad Libs!

White People Version:

_____(Name of Trailer Trash), has just found out that her husband, ______(single syllable white name) has slept with ___(number between one and ten) women in her ____(trailerpark/apartment complex). (Name of Woman) is very sad and cries a lot. (Husband's name) acts surprised and despondent, he is also crying. Maury tells them whether or not _____(Name of Bastard Child) is theirs, and the white lady (cries because she's sad/cries because she's happy).

Black People Version:

______(African name ending in -quisha) just found out ____(African name ending in -shawn) cheated on her with ___(number between 20 and 30) women without her knowing even though it was 20-30 women. Maury has a look on his face like "if she's that dumb she deserves it." (Black lady's name) cries a lot. Maury cues a video showing (black man's name) saying "(that baby ain't/i'm 1000 percent sure that baby aint/that baby's white so he can't be/that baby's ugly so he can't be) mine." (Black lady's name) turns from being sad to ultimate rage. She says (bring his ass out/he don't know me/ya'll know it's about to go down) and (stands up/takes off her shoes/both). Crowd boos when (black man's name) comes out. Maury says the baby (is/isn't) (black woman's name) and (black woman's name) (cries and screams/cries and begs for forgiveness/cries and says "AAHHH LAWWWD).

Fill it out! It's a recipe for success.

Jay needs a new laptop.

My screen shattered while I was turning my laptop a different direction so I could sit somewhere else.

My Paypal is Metamidnight[at]live.com if you wanna help.

Save your "I wish I could but I'm broke" shit for someone who isn't about to make jerky out of every fucking person that walks in front of him for the next week.

I gotta say, after playing 2, there's some big improvements.

Your neighbors age with you

Your Sims' interactions are much more diverse and important, I like to make mine sit at a computer and troll websites, I pretend it's FA. Then it's just like real life!

Your mood and experiences determine your job, so say, if you want to be a goth musician, be sad and have high music, if you wanna be a rock star, have high charisma, if you wanna be a pop star, have high happiness, and that's just 3 of the 24 (!) musical ventures you can take, and that's just ONE job.

Also, your Sims look much more realistic. Call them Realdolls if you will, but they just look like actual people.

WILL WRIGHT HAD NO HAND IN IT! That means the gameplay is actually tailored to everyone, and not just Will Wright. It's a world shaped by everyone, not just Will Wright. You can meet Sims online, something Will Wright vehemently opposed because he wanted it to be an "individual experience."

Now, the cons:

No faggotry (I just make a bearded lady and pretend she's by rough bear gay husband)
STILL NO FUCKING CEILINGS
The aging aspect is something I didn't really like and there's no option to turn it off. I want my Sims to live forever, fuck.
You get cars, but they kinda suck, like the Sims Bustin Out or whatever the one was for the console
It's a lot more like Urbz in the City in the fact that it's more dumbed down, if you want it to be. You can micro manage, or you can tell your Sim to just do this and that and then go to bed. It's much easier to take care of multiple Sims. They don't both have to shit at the same time when they KNOW you only have one fucking bathroom.

All in all, I give Sims 3 a 8.5/10, one point taken off because it's not all that different, and if you played any Sims before it you'll get bored quickly. The other half is because I want to have gay sex, god damnit.

The Megaupload links are down, torrent link is still active.

Perchance, does anyone have any

GREY POUPON

http://www.megaupload.com/?d=rb6zlyob
http://www.megaupload.com/?d=4xojwfuu
http://www.megaupload.com/?d=k46sn8oi
http://www.megaupload.com/?d=wwhxxqv0
http://www.megaupload.com/?d=0qgl62bj
http://www.megaupload.com/?d=zvkh9py4

I bestow upon thee, The Sims 3.

A full two weeks and some change before it comes out.

I love you guys.

For those of you who are impatient: http://isohunt.com/torrent_details/.....+3?tab=summary