After some consideration i am thinking of giving CF a miss, it may be a great con for some but i have my concerns and feel maybe its not for me. Im a rally goer and a rider and would rather avoid any awkwardness >.< plus the con fees could pay for my bike test which does mean alot to me. I dunno CF has lost its appeal to me recently =/

Loopy

As we are upon the eve of what is supposed to be the last day of winter I'll be glad that the white hare will be bringing spring finallly!! More sunshine , warmer temperatures, new life and growth ,spring is a time of change and I for one will be embracing it!

Happy equinox everyone and to all my pagan brothers and sisters may your wishes and hopes come to fruitition have a great celebration tomorrow =3


FL x

Conclusion i've come to from my rather painfully eventful morning . . . Those who shouldnt feel guilty do greatly and those who should dont. Got me thinking i need to re-evaluate my situation and who's in it. Too often my soft touch and cruel circumstances is used against me which needs to stop. Now is the time for people to prove themeslves to me too many masks and daggers have been used and i've had enough. My louality now will be to my clan and rally family unless proven intent is apparant.

Having just come back from an awesome weekend rallying got me thinking i have missed being in the scene so have made the decision to keep the furmeets and cons on the backseat. Dont get me wrong i do enjoy them its just well the bike scene has been a big part of my life for so many years i dont want to miss out. Also i haven't enjoyed the cons and meets as much so giving them a break may do me some good for a while so i can focus on my biking a bit more and avoid targetted drama. Going to do what makes me happy and what i like!!

With the over whelming responses to my last journal i'm planning on a solo trip to the coast on the august bank holiday, fri to mon prob camp over huntstanton way so if you see a solo purple bike wave hi. Loops

Seeing as the guys who claimed were up for a party to celebrate me getting back on the road have seemed to have dropped me like a used penny i'm trying to plan my own. Thinking of having it in kett as can use a community center or social club i know quite well. Nothing fancy just hoping to celebrate my 5 year break being over with some buds. If you're interested drop me a note, cheers FL

Here's a poem which means alot to me.

Not sure who wrote it but I wanted to share it with you guys, I think of this alot when i'm about to or am riding.

Biker Angel be my guide
As I climb upon my bike to ride.
Let your halo guide the way and
Keep me safe from harm today.
Let your wings provide me wind and air
And send it coursing through my hair.
Find for me a sunny place and let
It shine upon my face.
Keep the clouds and rain at bay
And keep me dry throughout the day.
Watch over my brothers who ride with me
Keep them safe and close to thee.
Keep my wheels upon the ground
So I'll return here safe and sound.
But should disaster be my fate,
Guide me through to heaven's gate.
If I must join my fallen brethren,
Please show me the way to Biker Heaven

Got the A-Z of ride out destinations jotted down so come summer time if you see a purple bike and a wee rider in black leathers and a pointy dual helmet give a wave or nod it'll be me. Exception when i head off to near welshpool that'll take at least a day as going to take it easy and going to such a remote place >w<. This means i won't be at as many meets and CF may be the only con i attend this year but it'll be fun and something i need to do. I love travelling and seeing new places and how better to do than cruising along and taking in the views along the way thats all part of the adventure :)

If something makes you happy but its not guaranteed should you persevear at it or just stick to what you know and certainties of it? Curious to others insights on the matter.

Been clocking up the miles and its felt great. Though somethings have been put into perspective. Why do something that sadden me or have people in my life that hurt me? I don't need those in my life and found i'm quite at peace lone wolfing. Granted a divorce is a tricky and testing time but all the better to recognise what i can cut off now for a more happy productive future. I know i did and tried my best to prove my long term commitment in the past but now i'm going to focus proving that to myself only. If i can't be happy in myself how can i expect others to do so. Me thinks i need moar rallies bike meets and nestle back to the only real family i've known and have. . . My biker brothers sisters uncles and adoptive mums and go back where i belong. Peace guys look after yourselves and each other x x

Its been so good being back on the saddle of my purple purring steed clocked up some miles this weekend and its still as fun as it was back in 08 :) means now i can do more see more and enjoy more yay. Ok so will have to make comprimises for rallies and meets (some tough choices ahead me thinks!) but i'm going to have fun either way! Just hope zukster doesn't mind sharing me with my bit on the side ride (already been caught sleeping on her by him i'm expecting to be taken to the JK show in due course to explain myself lol )

Calling a hiatus for a while, need to sort out stuff to do with the separation divorce amongst other things. Also had a very personal scathing attack made towards myself so while things still feel sore raw and exposed i think it'll be a good call to take the hiatus to gather my thoughts clear my head and try to get myself together as best as i can. Hope you all take care of yourselves and each othere. Loopy x

Well going back to Huntingdon tomorrow to continue my work role. Parts of me are concerned I wont be able to perform my duties as well as I did before I was signed off but can only do my best. I'll have to take baby steps and not do too much at once it'll take time for my mucle and weight to be back to how things used to be.

I'm so happy I've had the best of my buddies rally round and keep me going, its been a difficult time and without them I would have just spent a month in bed in tears.

Also had someone who cares about me and took the time to ensure i was happy and ok, did his up most to feed me up and cuddle me when I needed it. Thanks Zuki =P

Jessie, Mudiwa giraffe, Hell Badger and iWolf you have all helped me out when I needed my pals and for your efforts to cheer me up and laugh I am so grateful you're my buddies!!

Passed my CBT, instructor was brill and gave e a great tip about my balance on a bike. Once that was sorted it was like I was never off one. He told me I was one of his best students and suprised how well I can control a bike at slow and walking speed... YAY I can ride a solo again now !!!!

Big day tomorrow, going back onto a solo is going to be uber weird 0.o

I'm looking forward to afters when all the riding ( or attempted riding ) is done to spending new year in Brighton ...plus knowing how cold I'll be a warm hug is always welcomed =P

Nothing like bringing in the new year looking forward to starting my new life, new beginnings, new directions and of course having all that and sharing it with someone who cares and all that soppy soft stuff.

=3

Roll on 2013 and may it be a happy hoppy fluttery flappy fruity new year !!

So after a 4-5 year hiatus I'll be doing my CBT again on the 29th to get back onto 2 wheels as opposed to riding on 3.

Considering the last time I rode a bike was back in 2008 it'll be interesting to see if I still have it in me to ride like I used to.

I stopped riding due to my hearing loss and unbalancing on my R side, hopefully I'll be ok but no doubt find out on the day if I have what it takes to ride again.

Hope I do I miss the old days....