Hi everyone,
The last time I wrote about my current state was in April. Since then, this year has become the hardest one in my life.

In June, I lost my mother. It wasn’t sudden. It was long and painful — suffering that even morphine couldn’t fully ease, hour after hour. I still see it vividly, and those images haven’t left me.

In August, I brought a cat home. I was hoping to bring a little warmth and comfort — for myself, and for my grandmother, who had just lost her daughter. The cat is lovely, but she turned out to have health issues. We’re working on it, though we haven’t resolved everything yet.

On top of that, all responsibility for the household, finances, and planning fell on my shoulders.

My anxiety disorder and depression worsened under all of this, despite being on antidepressants. My psychiatrist told me something that stuck with me: in my situation, feeling bad is actually a healthy reaction to a very harsh reality. That I have no support to lean on. That I am the support for others — but no one is really holding me.

Over time, I lost interest in almost everything. Hobbies, books, movies, games — all of it feels empty. I focused on one thing only: functioning, and not falling apart completely.

And today, I buried my grandmother. Three days ago, in the morning, I found her cold body on the floor of her bedroom. She was very old and most likely passed away instantly. But nothing the day before suggested that her death would come so suddenly, and it came as a complete shock to me. That image, too, still stays with me. I keep feeling as if I didn’t do enough — that I missed something, didn’t manage something in time, wasn’t good enough.

Now I am left at home alone with my father, who struggles with alcoholism. His condition isn’t improving. He takes pride in his addiction, doesn’t see it as a problem, and is sober maybe once or twice a week at most. The rest of the time, I’m not really talking to a person — but to alcohol.

This is hard.

I am grieving. I feel pain and loss. I didn’t just lose the part of my original family that cared about me — I also lost my sense of identity. I kept going because I was needed, because others depended on me. Now, I don’t really know who I am anymore, or why I exist.

I don’t know how long this state of shock, numbness, and near-total lack of interest in life will last. I hope I will recover and be able to return to full work someday. For now, this is where I exist: https://www.furaffinity.net/gallery/pavusdrawus/.

Together with my girlfriend — the only person who is both close and able to truly hear me right now — I work on adopts. I also create new bases. It’s slow, meticulous work, but sometimes it helps me stay grounded and distracted from reality.

I hope next year will be better.
Even though, right now, I don’t really have the strength to hope.

A little reminder about my project here :>

https://www.furaffinity.net/gallery.....63/Open-adopts
https://www.furaffinity.net/gallery.....63/Open-adopts
https://www.furaffinity.net/gallery.....63/Open-adopts

https://www.furaffinity.net/view/61097618/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/61097618/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/61097618/

Hi everyone,
I’d like to share why I’ve been so quiet lately — both here and on Patreon.

Right now, I’m going through one of the most difficult times in my life. My mother, who has been bravely fighting cancer for the past five years, is now in the terminal stage. The doctors have done all they can. She’s home now, receiving palliative care, and I’m taking care of her — sleepless nights, injections, special meals, all the daily needs and support.

I’m also caring for my grandmother, who is almost 90 and has mobility issues after a minor stroke. My father is still working, but the overall emotional weight of the situation has been pushing him toward alcoholism, which makes things even harder for me.

I’m holding on. I’m under psychiatric care for generalized anxiety disorder and depression, and I’m also on hormone therapy due to severe endometriosis.
Right now, all my strength goes into keeping everything afloat, making sure my loved ones are as comfortable and cared for as possible in these final days.

I don’t have the time or mental space for much creative work. The only thing that helps me stay financially stable is collaborating with my girlfriend — I sometimes draw adopt bases or create adopts together with her.

I’m not leaving this account or giving up on art. I want to come back to it fully one day. But first, I need to make it through this time and slowly rebuild myself from the pieces after.

Thank you so much for your patience, for sticking with me through this.
If you’d like to support me, kind words mean the world right now. You can also check out the adoptable account I share with Pavus: https://www.furaffinity.net/user/pavusdrawus

Wishing you all a peaceful Easter, if you celebrate — and health and happiness to you and your loved ones. ❤️

https://www.furaffinity.net/view/60583181/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/60583181/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/60583181/

https://www.furaffinity.net/view/60470742/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/60470742/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/60470742/

https://www.furaffinity.net/view/60197453/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/60197453/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/60197453/

https://www.furaffinity.net/view/60239834/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/60239834/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/60239834/

https://www.furaffinity.net/view/60182820/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/60182820/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/60182820/

My dear friend created her first base for a sale! Please, take a look: it's extremely well done and has so many options!

https://www.furaffinity.net/view/60052486/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/60052486/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/60052486/

Today is a very special day—it’s the birthday of my favorite person, my partner, and the love of my life, ! 💜
We’ve been together for so many years, and every day I feel so lucky to share my life with someone so incredible. I’m endlessly grateful for her creativity, kindness, and rich imagination, as well as for the brilliance and warmth she brings into my life.

She’s also an incredibly talented creator who makes breathtaking adopts! If you’d like to make her special day even brighter, please send her some warm wishes or check out her gallery here:
https://www.furaffinity.net/gallery.....63/Open-adopts
https://www.furaffinity.net/gallery.....63/Open-adopts
A watch, a kind message, or a bid would mean the world to her—and to me too!

Thank you for taking a moment to celebrate someone so wonderful. She truly deserves all the love and joy this world has to offer! 💕

Please, take a look on gallery. Her artwork is something!!!

And she is open for commission right now :3
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/59138523/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/59138523/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/59138523/

Hey everyone!
I have some amazing news for everyone who loves splash-style art!
This is your chance to grab our collaboration YCH with at a discounted price! 🖤✨

I know some of you have shown interest in this piece before, so now’s the perfect time to claim it!

This is a fixed price for the only slot available. You can claim it here:
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/58686291/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/58686291/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/58686291/

Gorgeous artist is open for commissions today :> Please, pleeease take a look on 's gallery!

Here is a commission info:
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/58866342/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/58866342/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/58866342/

Hello, everyone!
The amazing artist and I have created a new YCH collab for you. It’s in the splash art style, and I’ve been passionately working to make my part (the idea and sketch) fit the theme and look just right ._.

Here’s the link, if you’d like to take a look:
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/58686291/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/58686291/

I’m excited to see who’ll step in as the character for this scene and for Ormurinn to work his magic with his incredible detailing! 💜

Hello, everyone!
Today, I'd love to introduce you to the gallery of adopts from my wonderful partner, 💜

Here’s her gallery:
https://www.furaffinity.net/gallery.....63/Open-adopts
https://www.furaffinity.net/gallery.....63/Open-adopts

Pavus’s adopts are offered at accessible prices, with a variety of unique races, vibrant colors, and creative designs. If you're looking to add a new character to your collection, there’s bound to be something for you!

And if you have something specific in mind, Pavus can create a custom adopt for you based on a large selection of bases she owns from other artists.

If you’re interested, please drop by, take a look, and follow for updates – new adopts are added daily! 💜

Hi there! ~

Collaboration YCH Splash Art style:
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/58686291/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/58686291/

And please take a look at these multi-slot YCHs.
There are only a few left, and they'll be closing soon!
If you're interested, it would be wonderful to see you in the comments ~

1) Female or Herm YCH [Romantic Elegance] - 1 slot is open:
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/55742063/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/55742063/

2) Hyper YCH [Morning Jog] - 1 slot is open:
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/53169363/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/53169363/

Hey, guys! Today we celebrate the birthday of my dear friend, wonderful and talented  InvidiaSaunder!
She is an incredibly hardworking, determined, and compassionate person, and her kindness knows no bounds. Plus, her gallery is truly worth your attention!

Feel free to visit her page, and if you enjoy her work, consider following her! 💜

Gorgeous artist is open for commissions today :>
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/56926609/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/56926609/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/56926609/

Maybe you will be interested in this new way of my art :D
I'd be happy to see any comments and favs!

https://www.furaffinity.net/view/56586478/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/56586478/

Today is a very special day for my lovely gf  PavusDrawus!
She’s my best friend, my closest and dearest person in the whole world, my love and support for almost ten years now! :3
[Yeah, you’re getting a year older, but that's no reason to be sad. May every year bring you more happiness and security, and may any changes be only for the better!]

Please, show Pavus some love too! She makes really cool and beautiful adopts, and her gallery deserves much more attention.
Any watch or fav will be appreciated!

Here is her gallery:
https://www.furaffinity.net/user/pavusdrawus

And here are some really tasteful adoptable reptilian ladies by Pavus without any bids. Take a look if you’re interested!
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/55104446/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/55080164/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/55056814/

Happy Birthday, dear ~💜

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year, dear friends! 🎄🌟
Thank you for staying with me. Thank you for all your support and attention!
It's been a difficult year. But we managed.
In honor of the holiday, me and my gf Pavus want to share the Christmas spirit with you and give out some new stuff and discounts!

First, I'm opening a new YCH in the Cyberpunk universe. Only two slots are available for hot edgy guys!
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/54917526/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/54917526/

Second, let me remind you that the last slot of the Cowboy YCH is still open. The price is also reduced for the holiday time!
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/52989414/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/52989414/

Last, but not least. Take a look at this beautiful adoptable serpent girl that Pavus created! Btw, the version with pin-up artwork by me is available in case of AB2 ~
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/54905147/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/54905147/

Be happy and take care of yourself and your loved ones!

And this day I celebrate my 35rd birthday.
I still can't believe how fast time flies. It's hard for me to accept my new age. Now I understand how much was wrong in my past.
I am going through a very difficult time right now. Perhaps this is my most difficult and depressing period in my life. I try to work hard, I try to take care of myself, but it's hard for me to believe that everything will be fine.
And yet, here I am, one more year older.

Thank you all for staying with me,
Frevilisk

I will take 2 weeks off. I'm taking new classes and it's very exhausting. I absolutely won't be able to draw during this time :<

Yes, my free art raffle lasted a little too long ><
So I decided to choose two winners - one of the random number, one of my personal liking for the character. It was really difficult, because there were LOTS of characters I would love to draw! T_T

So winning number is #133. Congratulations to
And I chose as the second winner!