My little brother went to see a movie yesterday, he went to see 'Drag Me to Hell'...and well from what he told me and the family, it was a BIG disappointment, he says that out of the entire film only three characters died, it wasn't so much scary as it was a big joke.

If I were you people, I would seriously think about saving your money and actually rent a horror movie that you know is scary. Instead of going to see 'Drag Me To Hell'.

You are not going to believe this but I'm wearing my sunglasses right now, why, because my normal pair broke on me, I mean it actually broke on the frame, we can't fix them, and I don't have a spare set with me.

Next thing you know I'll have to do is get a new pair, and even then, you're looking at a 2 week wait, if you're lucky.

You know out of all of this I'm kind of shocked, I mean I knew they were dirty and all that, but I didn't think they were that old, or would break on me the way that they did.

Anyway, my Mother is going to try and contact an eye-doctor, and if we can't get in right away, well, I don't know what we're going to do then.

Well, my parents decided to celebrate my Graduation from Technical College yesterday, went to a restaurant...now something I don't tell people often is I don't like dressing up a whole lot, I mean a polo-shirt and jeans is about as fancy as I'm willing to get most of the time, never really seemed to like khakis. It's not that I'm a slob...it's just, every time I have to dress up for something, it feels like I'm trying to be someone I'm not...and I hate that feeling.

Anyway, had Chicken Alfredo, downed a couple of Magaritas (I really don't like beer, but for some reason I can tollerate Tequilla...I actually prefer Magaritas over Beer or Wine any day of the week), had a pretty good time other-wise.

I know I haven't submitted anything for the last few weeks, but that's just because of all the school work I'm doing, just to let you know, I should be graduating this month (WOOT!).

This is just a journal to let all those watching me (or anyone who comes across my user-page) know I'm not dead, I haven't caught the H1N1 virus, I've just been really busy, but now that the winter semester draws to a close I'm going to start writing stories again soon.

Just to let you know, I've been working on a couple...and I hope to submit them soon.

Man, when I open my mouth...when I really speak what's on my mind, when I see a picture and leave a comment on it, and then get a response to it, do I have a real habit of tripping the detenator.

Let me explain, I don't suppose any of you  AthenaArctic?, yeah well, I made this one comment to one of the pics she submitted, her mate responded back, at that point...any sensible 22 year-old male would've ended the conversation right there...but unfortunately I wasn't thinking clearly and spoke my mind, which wasn't probably the smartest thing to do, and now I feel what i have started a fight with  BlazeArctic...one that I am afraid is not easily, or may never come undone.

To say the least I wish for no-ones sympathy, I'm tired of people feeling sorry for me, and I'm sick of feeling sorry for myself, but then again...how can I stop feeling sorry for myself, when feeling sorry for myself is all I can truly feel anymore?

Athena, if you are reading this, I did not mean what happened to turn out like this, if I could go back in time and change any of these past 3 days I would, I guess...I don't know, I feel horrible inside, but what makes it worse is I want to.

I mean I look back on my life, as far back as High-School, I've had nothing going for me, my only high-light I can make out of all of it is that I graduated. I have no job, no girl-friend (Hell, I can't even talk to a girl), and now I'm beginning to think that continuing my education (Going to Technical College) after 4 years might have been one of the biggest mistakes of my life.

Since I don't want to drag this on too long, I just put down what I'm feeling, I feel dead inside...I wanted somebody to love, a member of the opposite gender whom I could connect with, and I didn't care if they were married or not, I guess that's one of my fatal flaws...when someone has something I don't, it just warps me into this 'Jekyll/Hyde' type jerk, you and blaze have every right to hate me, I don't blame you, and I don't ask for your sympathy...unlike my stories, there seems to be no glimmer of hope for me.

Things seem to be changing for me, I've been getting comments and even faved for my writings,  AquaFurFan who has commented on my works, and even a Watch, and then there's  Midnight Star Kalkina (formerly  MidomiAensland), even though she hasn't commented on any of my work, she still decided to watch me...I'm still surprised about that one because I didn't really expect it to happen.

And then there's  Jewelwriter, whom I thank for at least giving me some comfort.

There are some other things another user suggested I do if I wanted to attract more attention...but money's a bit tight, and I really don't have a job at the moment.

But what makes me happy is I am attracting some attention, and that lifts my spirits.

I feel kind of depressed, I mean...I know there are some artists that probably go weeks or months without a single comment or watch, but I don't get it, I mean my writings were getting so little attention, so he tried something he knows he's not good at...and that's drawing, and even that seems to have back-fired on me.

No, I'm not giving up, I just...what am I doing wrong? That's what I'm trying to figure out, what am I doing wrong?!

I am really afraid right now, I forgot to delete an image I scanned on the computer downstairs, what's worse is my younger brother found it.

Now while I'm not worried about scarring him for life (he's 18), I am afraid that he can use this as a form of blackmail now, use it to make my life a living hell, and believe me it's a big enough one as it is, I don't need this kind of exposure.

Last night something unexplained happened last night, I was looking at the submissions of other artists I was watching, all the sudden when I hit the newest button, all they submissions were lined out vertically, with the newest one being erased (you know one of those 'Sumbission was deleted by the Poster' deals).

Of course my first action was to remove it, but when I tried to it wouldn't erase, I tried to remove it SEVERAL TIMES!!! But to no success.

In the end, I had to nuke all the submissions...so to all those artists I've been watching, I am sorry, to quote from one of her most recent journal entries "Life is so unfair".

Well I don't know if this would count but I went to the bank today to get some checks...actual checks, up until now all I've had is starter checks, which don't have the address on it (and which no god damn credit union will accept), of course it'll take 7 to 10 business days for them to arrive.

On a story note, I should have part two of 'The Devil Inside' either done tonight or tomorrow (depending on how hard I wish to push myself), not only that but I'm starting to think of a direction I want to take the story.

Good news, with the leaps and bounds I'm making, my first story containing my fursona should be ready by either tonight or tomorrow morning...I will warn you that it is long, but if any of you can bear through the crap, I promise you'll see some what I hope to be promising rewards.

You know, I've been thinking, just recently I updated my user page info and my Fursona Profile, but words can only do so much...and people these days are somewhat more visual, they want to see what something looks like, not just read a bunch of words that equal up to a description of that character.

I'm thinking of having one of the artists I know of could do a reference sheet, of both forms...problem is that most of the artists I know of would take it as a commission, and I have no idea of how I would pay them back, most of them would probably accept paypal, but I don't trust paypal, and I'm trying to financially be independent...man this literally sucks...I could make it a contest, but then what would the prize be?

Another thing I got from  Kiala_Tiagra

Sex in the Morning or Sex at Night?
Night, seems more attractive to me

Naughty Pics or Naughty Home Video?
Have not done either

Vibrator or Dildo?
Neither

Bedroom Sex: Lights Off or Lights On?
On

Word preference: Pussy or Cunt?
Pussy

Spanking Over the Knee or Spanking Only During Sex?
Neither

More Exciting: Sex in an Elevator or Sex in an Airplane?
Elevator

Word preference: Cock or Dick?
Cock

Rope Bondage or Bondage Tape?
Neither

Which threesome: Boy/Girl/Girl or Boy/Boy/Girl?
Girl/Boy/Girl

Sex While Strangers Watch or Sex with a Stranger?
Neither

Newly Discovered fetish?


Master or slave?
Master...nobody controls ME!

Slut or whore?
Both really

Light Bondage or heavy?
Not into that stuff

Whispering or screaming?
Both...we'll be whispering things at first, but when I'm done you bet she'll be screaming heh-heh.

Ever lost your sanity?
Yes

Most coveted perversion?
"Perversion" is a relative term.

Spanking?
NO

Submissive?
What the...we already covered this question

Under the boot or wearing the boot?
WTF are you talking about!?!

Hot Candle wax or warm?
Kinky...but not interested...

Relationship Status:
Single *I need some pussy real BAAAAAAAD X( !!!

Orientation:
Hetrosexual

Body type:
5' 11", a bit over-weight...but not fat

Religion:
(I don't feel like answering this one...but I am a Christian)

Zodiac Sign?
Virgo

Smoke / Drink:
Drink (Magaritas, Pina Coladas, anything but Beer)

Current Location:
I don't want to talk about it...

Your Weakness:
Procrastination...I hold things off quite a bit

Your Best Physical Feature:
My face, everyone says I'm hansome...but I don't see it

Your Bedtime:
11...11:30 P.M CST

In the past month have you Drank Alcohol:
yes

In the past week have you masturbated:
Maybe once a day if I feel like it

Number of Piercings:
None

Number of Tattoos:
None

Do you consider yourself perverted?
Yes...but I just can't help myself

At what age did you lose your virginity?
I'm still a virgin

Have you ever deflowered a virgin?
No, I want to, but no

If you give head, do you swallow?
I AM NOT GAY!!!

Do you like oral stimulation of the anus?
No!

Do you like penetration of the anus?
HELL NO!!!

Have you ever tried fisting
WTF what sick fuck do you take me for?

How would you rate the intensity of your sexual desires? On a scale of 1-10?
7

Nymphomaniacal?
Too old for that

Do sexual preoccupations interfere with other activities?
Yes, sadly.

Are you promiscuous?
Not sure

Do you ever regret sleeping with someone?
Haven't really slept with anyone yet

Do you ever have phone sex?
No

Do you ever call a 900 number (or similar commercial service) for phone sex?
That sort of thing exists?

Do you ever make obscene phone calls?
No

Have you ever had a sexual experience that defies your "normal" orientation?
AAAHHH...Confusing sentence!!!

Have you ever made yourself up to resemble the opposite gender?
No

Have you ever had an erotic experience with a transvestite or transsexual?
WTF!?!

Do you find feet, toes, or shoes erotic?
No

Do you find underwear, lingerie, or hosiery erotic?
Sometimes, it depends really

Do you find long hair, cut hair, or shaved hair erotic?
Long, just gives you so much more to play with when you're cuddling.

Have you ever peeped on someone?
Yes

Have you ever used a recording device such as a video camera to peep on someone?
Nope

Have you ever been caught peeping on someone?
a couple of times

Have you ever "flashed" someone?
no

Are you a sadist or masochist?
a bit of a sadist

Have you ever slapped, spanked, or whipped someone during a sexual act?
we are going over this again?

Have you ever been slapped, spanked, or whipped during a sexual act?No

Have you ever cut, scratched, pierced, or stabbed someone during a sexual act?No

Have you ever been cut, scratched, pierced, or stabbed during a sexual act?
yes

Do you like bondage?
No

Like to be tied up?
no

Like to tie up partner?
and no

Have you ever participated in a threesome?
No...but would like to.

If so, what gender were your partners? Both girls please


What is the maximum number of partners you've had during a sex act?


What is the most people you have slept with in a single day?


Does the idea of sharing a partner (such as inviting a neighbor to have sex with your spouse) excite you?
No. There is the standing rule of getting shot if someone tries

Have you ever had sex with a relative?
Thought about it...but never went through with it.

As a minor, did you ever have sex with an adult?No

As an adult, have you ever had sex with a minor?
No

Have you ever had sex with a person of retirement age?
Ew, ew, ewww...no!

Have you ever had sex with an animal?
*pulls out a magnum* do not make me hurt you!

Got this from one of  Kiala_Tiagra, and yes I do find her attractive, her and  vixenchan...hey, there's a threesome idea. XP *licks his lips deviously at the thought...then realizes he's typing his thought into the journal*...'ahem', not that I would ever attempt that, no not me...maybe some other perverted bastard without a girl-friend, but not me.

Would You...
[] Push me into a wall and kiss me?
[] Come To My House To Do Nothing But Chill?
[] Slap Me?
[] Have Hard Core Sex With Me?
[] Slap Me If I Asked You To?
[] Lick/Suck My Neck?
[] Let Me Lick/Suck Your Neck?
[] Watch A Movie With Me?
[] Take Me Out To Dinner?
[] Take A Shower With Me?
[] Take Me Home For The Night?
[] Let Me Sleep In Your Bed?
[] Let Me Sleep In Your Bed (With You)?
[] Take Me Anywhere With You?
[] Repost This For Me To Answer Your Questions?
[] Lock Me In Your room And Take Advantage Of Me?
[] Let me lock you in your room and Take Advantage of you?
[] Make me breakfast?
[] Tickle Me?
[] Let Me Tickle You?
[] Stick Up For Me If Someone Was Being Mean to Me?
[] Instant Message Me?
[] Greet Me In Public?
[] Hang Out With Me?
[] Hold my waist from behind while we are out?
[] Bring Me Around Your Friends?

Do You...
[] Miss Me?
[] Love Me?
[] Think I'm Hot?
[] Think I'm Cute?
[] Think I'm Ok?
[] Think I'm Ugly?
[] Want To Kiss Me?
[] Want To Cuddle With Me?
[] Want To Date Me?
[] Want To Love Me?

Am I...
[] Sweet?
[] Funny?
[] Cool?
[] lovable?
[] Adorable?
[] Great To Be With?
[] Attractive?
[] Mean?

Have You Ever...
[] Thought About Hooking Up With Me?
[] Found Yourself Wanting To Kiss Me?
[] Wished I Were There?
[] Had A Crush On Me?
[] Wanted My Number?
[] Had A Dream About Me?
[] Been Distracted By Me?
[] Thought About Fucking Me?

Are You...
[] Happy You Know Me?
[] Thinking About Me?
[] My Friend
[] A Freak-A-Leak

Hello again, well...for the last couple of weeks I've been trying to write a sequel to my last story, but as of late I have been having to sometimes force myself to write it, it has lead me to this one conclusion, 'Writing...it is not easy...'

Now I'm sure I'm not the only one, and I'm sure most other artist and writers would agree, that nothing is MORE aggrevating than drawing or writing a story, only not being able to finish it...or to be half-way through and then start on a whole different story.

Now for this journal I would like some feed back, just so that I know there are people watching me or looking at my stuff or favorites...plz?

Well, read one of journal entries from  redmagejacob...and it said that he was thinking of doing some pics of other peoples' characters over thanksgiving, but because of the certain actions of someone, whom he said that they 'know who they are'...he isn't going to do that now.

This does upset me a bit for a couple of reasons, the top one being is I think I was the one that might have caused him to do that.

So redmage...if you're reading this journal entry, please tell me I wasn't the one who forced you to do that, please reply to this journal and assure me that I wasn't the one who ruined it for everyone.

Finally, I don't have to look at that stupid paint-brush thing anymore, I finally got an avatar up...hmmm, now that I think about it, my profile info will need some tweeking now that I have it up.

Oh, incase you were wondering, the thing behind Shippo is supposed to be Kyuubi from Naruto, just...because of this sites strict settings I had to crop the image, it's almost impossible to put an image in there that's 100x100 pixels...no offense FA.

Well, I don't knoe if it means much to anyone, but a site I go on http://gunslingerboy.forumcircle.com/portal.php?

seems to go quiet every weekend or so, Gunslinger Inc. is a RPG story site, I really can't explain it very well...so you'll have to go there and see for yourselves, now again, I say it doesn't really have to matter to anyone, but if you feel up to it, check it out, register to it, there are some good people there.

The one thing I hoped would happen...and it didn't, the one team I was pulling for...and they couldn't deliver!

Now some of you might be saying, well the Rays aren't exactly the best team when you compare them to the Philies...bull-shit, this is the kind of stuff that always happens like take last years' World Series, what was it Colorado vs. Boston...of course being the person that I am I rooted for the Rockies...and guess what happened, they couldn't freakin' deliver either.

I'm wondering if I should just give up on Baseball all-together.

Well it finally happened, I finally caught a head cold, my left nostril is all stuffed up, and my right is almost stuffed up too...I just hope it doesn't turn into acute broncitus, like it did last fall...I tell you it was so bad that I didn't really believe that was my voice or not.

Anyway, celebrations are in order,  redmagejacob finally read my story, I thank him for the comment, and the favorite, as well as for the favorite and watch.