10 albums that have made me into the person I am today:

1. "Before the Dawn Heals Us" - m83
2. "They're Only Chasing Safety" - Underoath
3. "Birth.Eater" - Oceana
4. "Teenage Fantasy" - Secret & Whisper
5. "O' God The Aftermath" - Norma Jean
6. "Lights and Sounds" - Yellowcard
7. "The Changing of Times" - underOATH
8. "Lift" - Audio Adrenaline
9. "All The Time in the World" - Jump 5
10. "Phenomenon" - Thousand Foot Krutch

So... Mainly Christian artists, and mainly hardcore. Haha.

YAAAAAAY NO MORE BEING A MINOR! No more having to have my parents sign things because I'm still underage! I can go to gay clubs! I can see the magical world of FURRY PORN :O So yeah I'm looking forward to it. How did you guys party for YOUR 18th? (If you've had it already.)

Oh and re: the previous journal.
I'm still getting around to those. Slowly. Darn you summer school xD

COMMENT AND I'LL:

1. Tell you something I'll learn about you from looking at your FA page for 13 seconds.
2. Tell you what color you remind me of.
3. Tell you my first memory of you.
4. Tell you what Pokemon you remind me of.
5. Ask you something I've always wondered about you, and your answer has to be as vague as possible to keep the suspense.
6. Tell you my favorite thing about you.
7. Give you a weird nickname.
8. Tell you what's on my shirt right now.
9. Challenge you to post this on your journal. (That one's whatevs~)

1. Put your media player of choice on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS!

IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY?
"Mood Rings"
(as in, I need a mood ring to give you a proper answer)

WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
"A Dialogue"
(actually yeah. Usually when I think, I'm thinking as if I'm talking to someone, or writing up a journal/blog post)

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL (A guy obviously)
"Weaving the values that sustain us"
(HE MUST HAVE MORALS XD)

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
"Higher than the stars"
(my purpose is to get stoned xD)

WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
"Death and all of his friends"
(Um.)

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
"Father Christmas"
(...Definitely not.)

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
"Louder Than Thunder"

WHAT IS 2+2?
"Time Becomes Cyclical"

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
"Highway Ghosts"

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
"No Angel"
Haha. True.

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
"We'rewolf."
I have multiple personality disorder. All of us are wolves.

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
"Parasol Parachute"

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
"Pretty Snarl"

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
"Can You Find Me"
I.... I don't know D:

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
"Love In The Club"
(Lol no we will definitely be headbanging or else tripping to M83.)

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
"Break Me Out 2.0"
Um... k

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
"The Ballad of Buddy Bigsby"
...

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
"Jacket Hangs"

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
"Lies"

WHAT'S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
"Hoodoo"
("Hoodoo is a form of predominantly African-American traditional folk magic. Also known as conjure, it is a tradition of magical practice that developed from the syncretism of a number of separate cultures and magical traditions.")

HOW WILL YOU DIE?
"Act II: All is Ash or the Light Shining Through It"
(VOLCANOS!)

WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?
"Below the Sky"
So... basically everything that isn't a currently flying aeroplane or bird.

WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
"Pal-Treaux"

WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
"Something About Us"

WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?
"Apocalypse Please"
(OH GAW .__.)

WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
"We Own The Sky"

DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
"Moving Parts"

IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?
"Treasures"

WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
"The Holders"
(My... my hands? o3o)

WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
Berlin

 teddybearlumpkins raised a very interesting question in a journal over heah: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/1537419/

I ended up typing a LOT more than I thought I would in response to it, hehe.

So head on over and join the discussion!

Aka: don't reply to THIS journal. 'Cos it's Teddy's topic/idea, not mine.

http://www.last.fm/music/The+Pains+.....+1-JTDQZfFCrQk

Whether or not you enjoy the song is irrelevant, although I do hope you enjoy it 'cause I did.

Just... Just watch the video. You will be surprised. Or at least I was.

Yeah, not going to be posting, if even writing, for like a week, okay.

┐('～`)┌

BAI!

Okay so we are in classroom, it's "advisory" period which is basically just "My teacher whines and and moans about how we throw him under a bus and he's in trouble in the office and why don't we do better and we should apply for more scholarhips" and so on and so forth.

Anyway.

So my principal brings some visitors in and one of them mentions he's a graduate from the University of Southern California.

Did I mention I'm going to UCLA in the fall?
I probably didn't.
I'm going to UCLA in the fall.

AKA, U$C is my rival.

And he compliments my classmate who's wearing a red/gold $C jacket and says that they're going to have to make him a Trojan or something (U$C's sports team is the Trojans)

Did I mention UCLA is the bruins? We're the Bruins.

So then my imagination just kicks into wild overdrive and in the space of like two seconds I totally just imagine standing up, morphing into a bear and tackling this guy, not to kill him but just like "RAWR UCLA IS BETTER THAN YOUR SNOOTY STUCK UP SCHOOL" and it all happened really fast but I guess maybe I have more bear qualities than I previously believed o_o

So yeah that is the story for the day.

Maybe once I've been attending UCLA for awhile, gain my Freshman 15, and so on, I'll feel more comfortable turning my fursona into a bear or at the very least a fat fur xD

Oh yeah and I got ONE thing in my formspring, from anonymous xD

"Salmon tastes nice. But scallops are godly. Do you agree?"

And the answer to that is............

I don't like fish D: I don't really like eating anything that lives in the water. I mean, I haven't tried EVERY single type of fish or else lobster/crab/etc but from what I have smelled/tasted I just do not enjoy it at all :X

I'd much rather have hamburgers and hot dogs xD Or pizza. Or a burrito. Mmmm, burritos....

Right then, I think that's all I have to report. Hope you've been enjoying the story so far x3 I've been taking the writing a bit slower lately. But I'll do my best to get at least two chapters out a week. Huzzah!

~*the end*~

Okay so I kind of wanted to post my formspring, but my URL is my name.
And I mean, it's really not THAT hard to track me down, if you're looking for me, but I dunno. I feel like FurAffinity is this one website, where in a sense, no one is who they say they are. Because you make up your fursona, and give 'em a different name, and maybe they have some physical similarities to you, or maybe they weigh 750 pounds, or else are a muscle hulk, or even a different gender.

The point is, everyone on FurAffinity generally interacts with everyone else not knowing each other's real names or what they look like and that is okay and I kind of like having FurAffinity be one place where most don't know my real name and actually have a fair amount of anonymity.

So anyway ~*~*~*~*HERE IS THE SOLUTION*~*~*~*~

Back in the day

Before formspring.me

There was a site called "formspring.com"

And people used THAT for anonymous messages.

So without further ado, here's my formspring: http://www.formspring.com/forms/?655709-4xLSwJY1dP

There's two boxes. In the first one, I'd like to leave your username, but that's really up to you. If you want to be anonymous, go for it.

So go ahead and ask anything, I'll put the replies up in a couple days, on my journal here at FA.

>((((*> Whatareyouwaitingfor-goclickthelinkalready <*))))<

1: In real life I don't usually say what I'm thinking because I think it's a bother :D Especially if it's negative.

2: This is good because in my head I am very very judgemental. And that's bad. P.s. It's judgmental but that looks dumb so I type judgemental.

3: I don't believe that "good" music truly exists. For instance, I LOVE some hardcore bands. Others I know dismiss it as just noise and pounding, so they would say it's "bad" music. I, meanwhile, get charged up by these songs, it makes me want to dance and jump and scream and shout and it makes me feel alive. So of course, I call it "good" music. Thus: Good or bad is music is ENTIRELY relative. (Please note: I still believe there is a difference between talented, and not so talented music. I LOVE The Chariot, but I don't think it takes a whole lot of talent to make music as crazy chaotic as that mess. I don't care for a lot of Radiohead, but I think their music took a lot of talent to create. So yeah)

4: I HATE POLITICS. I HATE EVERYTHING ABOUT POLITICS. I DO NOT CARE ABOUT YOURS, OR ANYONE ELSE'S POLITICAL OPINIONS. I DO NOT WANT TO SEE YOU JOIN PRO OR ANTI HEALTHCARE GROUPS ON FACEBOOK. I DO NOT WANT TO SEE YOUR STATUS UPDATES SUPPORTING OR BASHING IT.

I

DO

NOT

CARE

ABOUT

ANYONE'S

POLITICAL

OPINIONS.

(sorry, but a bit too much crap on my facebook lately -.-)

5: I have like no friends on this website :D I talk to three of you semi regularly. WillSpark, Zeichwolf, and SirRob.

6: If I weren't a Christian, I'd probably be a nihilist.

7: My Myers-Briggs Personality Type code is INFJ. Only 1% of people have this code, we're the rarest of all Myers-Briggs personality types. This means in a group of 100 people, chances are I'm the only one.

And to be honest that sometimes kind of sucks.

8: Last tuesday, I almost died of blood loss. Read: Woke up, got the biggest bloody nose of my life, leaked all over sheets, floor, hallway, bathroom door/floor/sink, my hands, and face. Stopped that stuff, then went to internship where I framed photos. While handling the glass I slipped and shallow cut my pointer finger. Band aided that, then went back to framing. Got a much deeper cut into my thumb. Stopped that, finished up, went home. Got a SECOND bloody nose.

...I'm not making this up, it was insane xD

THIS IS A WHINY FRUSTRATED JOURNAL. IF YOU CLICKED HERE AND DON'T WANT TO BOTHER TO READ IT ALL, SCROLL ALL THE WAY DOWN UNTIL YOU SEE THE OTHER TEXT THAT'S IN ALL CAPS.

Okay this is just me thinking out loud here.
Well, thinking and typing out my thoughts.

Okay so if you haven't noticed I start stories and abandon them easily. Or else I just write one shot stories, where someone transforms or something and then that's it.

Too Tubby Tiger is the only thing I've ever stuck with, and of which I've written more than two parts.

And lately, I've been pissed off and asking myself WHY.

I've been trying to come up with new story ideas so I have stuff to upload, I really have.

I've been talking to my friend Will (WillSpark on here) about this, and just... I don't know.

Every time I try to write something, I get one, maybe two pages into it and then I come up against some logistical error, or the transformative part is taking too long to come up in the story and then more things pop up that I don't like about the story, I get disgusted, I delete it.

WHY?

I'm not entirely sure. How did I manage to type up 9 parts of at least 6 pages each? The story really just poured out of me every time I sat down to type up some more. Sure, I hit a couple walls but I just thought about it when I went to my work shift and I don't know, they weren't really difficult problems.

Clearly everything I've tried to write since Too Tubby Tiger is missing something or somethings that TTT had. Maybe it was the fact that TTT didn't seem to focus on any transformation, or a trigger and then a transformation and then done. I mean yeah he was constantly gaining weight but it's not like a TF story where that's almost like the center of the plot.

Basically I'm just thinking maybe everything I've been trying to write since then is just focused so much on the weight gain itself. And I get so bored trying to invent a backstory when all I really need is for the characters to hurry up and find the magic amulet or radioactive stone or really whatever the heck the trigger is for the story.

Meanwhile TTT focused a lot on the character and how he was dealing with this problem amongst his friends and family.


AND MY PERFECTIONISM.
Okay total turn of subject in the journal but this just game to my mind.

I have a HUGE problem with keeping stories logical. If I can't explain something, I abandon the story. This is a huge issue when I have a character, in my mind, blow up into a 500lb blimp and then his family finds out. I mean logically, what would happen is they'd probably freak and call the doctor and news would leak to the media and it would all blow up.

In TTT, this didn't happen. Why? I don't know.

But in my head, when I come up against that kind of logical brick wall, I just give up immediately. Bad? Probably. But trying to figure out a solution just makes my head hurt. I can never work it out in my head and so I give it up.

So there you have it, I guess.

My problem is I'm in too much of a rush to get to the weight gain, the transformation, the muscle... The FUN part of the story that I get bored writing the backstory and after story. And once I hit a logical brick wall, it's just a good excuse to give up completely.

UGH I just HATE this.

I'm just being whiny at this point, but I really want to get out of this funk.

I want to write another story like TTT.

Where I actually get some good comments and feedback and faves and watches.

I really wish I could just let myself write quick one shot weight gain, muscle, or tf stories but the perfectionist in me just hates that.

Those stories suck.

Okay no I really shouldn't bash and generalize like that.

When I write them, they suck.

And short quick stories even from other people are sometimes bad too.

Like okay, just going to be really blunt here.
You might want to look away.
Here goes.

Short quick weight gain stories, muscle stories, and TF stories (but especially weight gain) still turn me on to a degree and they're enjoyable to read because of that, but they're very hard to enjoy as a story, for their writing qualities, you know?

Some of them are really just porn.
And is that bad?
No, it's not.

I know plenty of furries are here for fapping material.
And that's okay, not ranting about any of that.

But my point is I can't let myself just write a short story just so omg yay it turns people on.

I WANT TO WRITE GOOD CRAP.
BUT I CAN'T BECAUSE OF THE REASONS LISTED ABOVE.
THE END.






HNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGG.


If you have any ideas on what TTT had, that my other stories are lacking, PLEASE comment. Or if you have inspiration ideas.


See, that's the thing.
I'm not out of ideas for triggers. Things that can cause the weight gain, muscle growth, or TF.
I've got plenty of ideas, but like story wise I'm just dead-brained.

Okay actually the end now.

1. First thing you wash in the shower?
Hair

2. What color is your favorite hoodie?
Gray.

3. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?
Probably

4. Do you plan outfits?
I plan them when I wake up in the morning... I dunno. I don't just throw on any old thing, but I don't think a lot either.

5. How are you feeling RIGHT now?
Anxious because I might not beat this boss in Castle Age, also I want my dad and mom to hurry home with Subway.

6. What's the closest thing to you that is red?
This outline from church service

7. Tell me about the last dream you remember having?
I was just chatting with my friend Rhett on Skype and then suddenly I was in Kansas on his college campus. Hanging out with him. It was like I’d teleported but I know I’d driven because I remembered telling him “Look I can’t stay too long or my mom is going to wonder where I am.”

What makes this dream really interesting is I googled it the morning after, and to drive to his college campus would take over a day...

8. Did you meet anybody new today?
No

9. What are you craving right now?
The latest Solitary episode. And subway. And a burrito.

10. Do you floss?
Rarely

11. What comes to mind when I say cabbage?
:|

12. Are you emotional?
Sometimes

13. Have you ever counted to 1,000?
That sounds painful.

14. Do you bite into your ice cream or just lick it?
I bite if it's warm enough, haha.

15. Do you like your hair?
No :| It's freaking thick and dark. I wish I had thin, short blond hair that I could spike easily.

16. Do you like yourself?
I dunno. I like my personality.

17. Would you go out to eat with George W. Bush?
Yes.

18. What are you listening to right now?
"Ghost Town" - Shiny Toy Guns

19. Are your parents strict?
They're very paranoid of everything, which makes them relatively strict.

20. Would you go sky diving?
Yes

21. Do you like cottage cheese?
Yuck.

22. Have you ever met a celebrity?
Not that I can recall.

23. Do you rent movies often?
No.

24. Is there anything sparkly in the room you're in?
Probably somewhere

25. How many countries have you visited?
Mexico.

26. Have you made a prank phone call?
Nope.

27. Ever been on a train?
The trolley, I have.

28. Brown or white eggs?
┐('～`)┌

29.Do you have a cell-phone?
Yes

30. Do you use chap stick?
No.

31. Do you own a gun?
Nope.

32. Can you use chop sticks?
Sort of

33. Who are you going to be with tonight?
My family.

34. Are you too forgiving?
I think the question you meant was "Do you forgive too easily?"

35. Ever been in love?
Not really.

36. What is your best friend(s) doing tomorrow?
School

37. Ever have cream puffs?
I think?

38. Last time you cried?
Watching Avatar

39. What was the last question you asked?
Heck if I know

40. Favorite time of the year?
Summer

41. Do you have any tattoos?
Heck no

42. Are you sarcastic?
Never

43. Have you ever seen The Butterfly Effect?
Nope

44. Ever walked into a wall?
Yes

45. Favorite color?
I don't have a favourite colour. I like them all, just not all the shades of them. For instance; sky blue: very yes. Dark purple: Yugh

46. Have you ever slapped someone?
Yes

47. Is your hair curly?
No

48. What was the last CD you bought?
I don't know but the next one I'm buying is "Teenage Fantasy" from Secret and Whisper

49. Do looks matter?
Always

50. Could you ever forgive a cheater?
Yes

51. Is your phone bill sky high?
I don't pay it :)

52. Do you like your life right now?
S'alright. Noticeable lack of superpowers though.

53. Do you sleep with the TV on?
Very no.

54. Can you handle the truth?
I already have :O~

55. Do you have good vision?
Decent

56. Do you hate or dislike more than 3 people?
Hate: No. Dislike: Yes

57. How often do you talk on the phone?
Very rarely. I text far more often. My dad actually just showed me the bill he got for the last month. I had like 22 minutes of calls, and over 1,000 text messages...

58. The last person you held hands with?
Fergot

59. What are you wearing?
Socks, cheap monday jeans, briefs, red v-neck, gray american apparel hoodie

60.What is your favorite animal?
Tigers :O~

61. Where was your default picture taken at?
Um, Rob did it for me o_o

62. Can you hula hoop?
Yuss

63. Do you have a job?
No :| I miss my old job.

64. What was the most recent thing you bought?
Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

65. Have you ever crawled through a window?
Yes sir

001. Name → Davage
002. Nickname(s) → None.
003. Status → Single
004. Zodiac sign → Virgo?..
005. Male or female → Male
006. Nursery → Never
007: Primary School → Homeschool
008. High School → The MET
009. Smart → Sure?
010. Hair color → Dark dark brown
011. Long or short → fairly short
012. Loud or Quiet → Quiet
013. Sweats or Jeans → I wish it was socially acceptable to wear sweatpants more places... So much more comfortable.
014. Phone or Camera → Both
015. Health freak → Never
016. Drink or Smoke? → Nope
018. Eating or Drinking → Both. Duh?
019. Piercings → Ugh no
020. Tattoos → No thanks

FIRSTS:

023. First Mate → n/a
024. First best friend → Jake
025. First award → "Sparky" award in AWANA
026. First crush → Oh geeze, I dunno. I think my first one that had any depth was this girl named Summer. (Ironically I turned out gay, eh?)
027. First pet → Goldfish
028. First big vacation → Disneyland I think
030. First big birthday → I don't like big birthdays

CURRENTLY:

049. Eating → These pretzel bite nibblet things
050. Drinking → Nada
052. I'm about to → Answer question 53
053. Listening to → "The Family Disease" - Oceana
054. Plans for today → school, computer, sleep

FUTURE:

058. Want kids? → Some days I do, some days I don't. Primarily not, though
059. Want to get married? → Illegalllllll. I'd want a lifetime partner though
060. Careers → Photographer

WHICH IS BETTER WITH OPPOSITE SEX?

068. Lips or eyes → eyes
070. Shorter or taller? → shorter?
072. Romantic or spontaneous → I don't know maybe neither
073. Nice stomach or nice arms → whatever
074. Sensitive or loud → ew neither
075. Hook-up or relationship → relationship
077. Troublemaker or hesitant → Mostly hesitant

HAVE YOU EVER:

080. Lost glasses/contacts → Never worn them
081. Ran away from home → No
084. Broken someone's heart → Probably
085. Been arrested → Nope
087. Cried when someone died → Nope

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

089. Yourself → Yeah, to an extent
090. Miracles → mhm
091. Love at first sight → Yeah but not very often
092. Heaven → Yes
093. Santa Claus → No
094. Sex on the first date → Definitely not
095. Kiss on the first date → Maybe..

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY:

097. Is there one person you want to be with right now → Yes
098. Are you seriously happy with where you are in life → Content
099. Do you believe in God → Yes
099. Do you believe in God, Gods, or higher powers? → Yes
100. Post as 100 truths and tag people-- > Tagging is for squares.

*sexual angst below. read with caution. Or not at all. That would be smart*












Fat guys who love skinny guys, or skinny guys who love fat guys are SUCH A RARE BREED, I SWEAR.
It seems like the twinks love the twinks, and the bears love the bears, in general.
And I sit here
Not even 150 pounds
And loving all these fat fur pictures.

I saw this one picture today, just a sketch really, of a skinny guy making out with a lovely big bellied fellow and I just said to myself WHY ISN'T THERE MORE OF THIS.


If you could provide me with links to some of this.
You would be my hero.

</angst>
</pointlessjournal>

http://7.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ku.....s2v4o1_400.jpg

I have NEVER enjoyed dressing up or putting on costumes or anything but AAAHHH I WANT THAT MEWTWO SUIT.

Apparently hairy skinny gay guys are known as "otters" just as hairy bulky gay guys are known as "bears."

Hmm. Didn't know this.

1. Real tree or Artificial Tree?
Artificial ;D

2. Miniature lights, LED lights, or Old fashioned bulbs on your tree?
I like old fashioned.

3. Do you have a favorite ornament of your tree?
Bell

4. Is there a special thing you you do (or have done) with your family at Christmastime?
Not traditionally.

5. What is your funniest memory of Santa?
None.... Ahaha.

6. Do you like a white, snowy Christmas?
No D: .

7. What is you favorite Animated Christmas movie on TV? And Character?
Charlie Brown Christmas and Snoopy.

8. What is you favorite Non-animated Christmas movie on TV?
I... I... I don't know D:
Wait yes I do.
Unaccompanied Minors.

9. What is your favorite Christmas song?
O' Come Emmanuel

10. Do you prefer hot cocoa or Eggnog?
Cocoa

11. What is your favorite Christmas cookie?
Gingerbread, no icing or frosting. I'm a gingerbread purist.

12. What do you love to eat at your Christmas dinner?
apple pie and vanilla ice cream

13. Do you string up your Christmas Cards, Put them in a card bin, or set them up on a table?
I forget :S

14. Do you (have you) ever go (gone) Christmas caroling?
No.

15. Have you ever been kissed under the Mistletoe? Just kissed?
Nope.

16. What is your most favorite Christmas memory?
I've none :|

17. Do you open the presents Christmas Eve or morning?
Christmas morning

18. Do you like to give or get presents?
Yes

19. Best Christmas gift you ever received? Worst?
I dont' remember my Christmas gifts as well as my birthday ones.

20. Hardest person to buy for? Easiest person to buy for?
Almost everyone is hard.

21. What you hate most about shopping for Christmas gifts?
Parking, I'd say.

22. Most wonderful thing about this time of the year?
Lights

23. Most annoying thing about this time of the year?
Bad christmas music

24. What do you want for Christmas this year?
A kitten

25. If you had one wish to give to anyone this Christmas, what would it be?
I.. they... D'you mean WHO would it be? Or what would I give?... I'm confused.

So I logged into my yahoo account today for the first time in like a month (it's really only my email for signing up for sites that might spam me) and noticed like three people tried to add me on Yahoo's IM. So I'm sorry to anyone who wanted to contact me, but yeah. I don't use Yahoo IM. I'm an AIM kind of guy.

This isn't to say I don't want to get in touch with you though ^^ You can note me for AIM or Skype, or just note me in general. :P

Oh yeah and Zeich I added you on AIM so I'll probably see you on there sooner than later :O


Oh oh yeah and story.

I'm writing one :3

It's coming along slowly, but it feels SO good to write again.

I'm not gonna reveal too much, but suffice to say it will contain TF, weight gain, and probably muscle too so erryone gets to be happy, ja?

So if you remember, a week before furaffinity asploded, my mom had recently found out I'm gay. She found out on a Thursday, I believe, and told my dad on the following Sunday.

So yeah they've both been working through it. I don't know. They still think it's sin, and while they're not focused on condemning me, they are kind of making me shaky and uncomfortable with myself again @___@. I mean no offense to anyone here, but because I consider myself a Christ-follower/Christian/whathaveyou, my faith is more important to me than my sexuality.

Heck, someone I know made a good point and that's that one's sexuality- let ALONE sexual orientation- is just a small ASPECT out of one person's life. To become obsessed over it, and make a big deal out of it just isn't right.

Anyway I'm trying to work through that.

I'm guessing a lot of you are going to be in support of the "You can be gay and Christian" ideal, and while I respect your opinions I do think it'd be a little wiser to trust one of the pastor's at my church I've been talking to (who thankfully has agreed to keep my orientation a secret.)

I know that might be bad news for some of you, but trust me I'm not the first nor the last person in his church that's gay. He's more concerned about my walk in my faith, than condemnation.

SUMMARY:
Coming out has gone pretty well overall.
Just about everyone I'm out to offline thinks it's sin but doesn't condemn me for it.
I'm still not sure if it's sin myself, I really hope it's not but hoping doesn't change truths.

I feel like sleeping around is almost like a hallmark of gays. I don't know, I don't ever plan on doing that. Just putting that out there.

That's one thing It old both my parents too, because they were like "omg you will get aids and die too young."

I don't know I don't feel like writing this journal anymore I'm gonna end it here.

She took it relatively well, although she's told me she's having a very hard time thinking of me as gay, and she does still believe it's sin and all that...

However she's not making me go to counseling or anything so that's good.

But she's going to tell my dad on Sunday after church :S And I'm positive that that is going to go way worse. Blargh...


That's pretty much all I have to say in this journal. Prayer/good luck would be appreciated.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=77WyuIiLSnc

...I mean, seriously, holy crap.

He's almost as big as this GIANT guy I saw while working at Seaworld last summer. This Seaworld guy was definitely wider though, looked like 500 pounds at least.

I don't think the guy was a gainer though. Maybe he was. I don't know.

Why am I still typing this out.

I'm listening to "You make me laugh" (remix of some sort) by Feel.

It's a stupid song.

Like I've listened to Animal Collective and other such Noise rock. And I can appreciate it, but I can't stand listening to it.

Same with this Feel artist. All of their songs are music, but it's got all this overlayed noise that makes it so stupid.

Stupid.

I just got a polaroid film pack, I'm excited.

I should be writing.

I really should.

Bah.

Here are the rules.

If you reply here...

1. I'll respond with something random about you.
2. I'll tell you which song or movie you remind me of.
3. I'll pick a flavor of jello to wrestle you in.
4. I'll say something that only makes sense to you and me.
5. I'll tell you my first memory of you.
6. I'll tell you what animal you remind me of.
7. I'll ask you something I've always wondered about you.
8. I'll tell you my favorite thing about you.
9. I'll tell you my least favorite thing about you.
10. If you play, you MUST post this on yours.

(You can disregard 10 though, y' don't have to post it in yours. I don't mind/care.)

No offense to anyone who is one but


FUCKING COYOTES.




I just thought she was going to be here for awhile. That I'd be able to go off to college and still come back home where she'd be waiting to nuzzle me and lick me all over the place and hop into my lap while I'm trying to watch Hulu.



But nope.



Dead.



Or rather, there's tufts of fur in her colour in the canyon, both dad and neighbors heard some sort of catfight last night, and she hasn't come home at all yet today, when she usually barges into my room at 5:00 am.




So yeah.





Dead.




*rage*

Did not see that one coming. At all :|




















*spoilers below this you might not want to read unless you've seen the movie or don't care*












Do you guys think Hoffman lived?
Also, I think it was ridiculous the amount of people that died in this movie. ESPECIALLY on the Carousel Trap, what the crap was that all about.
Saw was originally supposed to be about saving yourself and realizing the value of life, now it's kind of about saving yourself at the expense of everyone else. Ha. Survival of the fittest.

I thought that Oxygen trap was genius though.


And that "Pick one person to hang, one to live" trap, wtf was that. It was original but I wasn't a fan.

I'm personally rooting for Rudy to win.
I really hope he gets farther than my last year personal I-hope-he-wins, Dane.


...This really is a pointless journal.