COMMISSION OPEN for attendees at the Novegro's comic fair on Feb 2nd Milano Italy

Will I make more in future? possible, if I reache more than 9 request I'll make this a stable thing

Italiano from here on:
Allora, se andate alla fiera dei fumetti di novegro, tra poco (owo"). offro a poco dei badge colorati, questa volta le info dei prezzi sono in questa submission:
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/63723570/

I badge sono tutti a mano e quindi saranno consegnati in loco.
Pagamento paypal ma anche di persona.

4 slots in totale, solo 1 ancora libero! e, non scherzo, accetto solo ancora fino a martedì 27 Gennaio

Veloci che non posso farvele, per bene, all'ultimo!

Well yes, these years sucks, I'm uneployed since May and I can only get some money from a renting activity I’m doing for/with an a-hole who can’t fucking deal with his temper and that is starting to strain, but it’s money, so for now is acceptable. No contract tho’.

On the good side I’m still co-managing my Channel and Discord server Anthro Magazine with some friends and there we hold theme nights and irl meetings, I might as well post some pics here, I’ll think about it. I'm on my feet(paws)

All in all my mind is fine, not ok, I see many struggles in my motivation, my way to perceive other’s actions and seldom I question other’s opinion and value system; how I came this far? I’ve been backstabbed trice this year by a fucking asshole artist Zack (the one on the pic made by seomni in my gallery here), after seven fucking years of trust, confidence and joyful times, for absurd and childish reasons. Wouldn’t recommend to deal with him ngl, he always said his life would have fade into loneliness, guess he’s right, by betraying friends he’ll get what he deserves soon.

Then came the turn of a friend hyena-sona, Lory Yeen, who I helped very much to get out of his shyness. I was the one of the few not considering him an outcast during furmeets and also invited him to come with me in a new year’s eve fur party in Germany (2022-2023), not to mention how many times I got him into my house…he and his motherfuckin geisha.

This year I was getting close to a new blue-dragoness guy, probably a T-wannabe? A femboy? Don’t know don’t care, name is Vicky (also Raysen bluetail). The geisha was faking with me the start of a relationship and in the meantime had an affair with the fuckface guy. They toyed with my trust and feelings and didn’t bother to be honest. Good thing she has a past of being a bitch so I guess he’s gonna have trust issues with her for a long time, I wish them good fights.
So yes, I’m doing a bit of drama, fact-based; I had really enough of being ass-kicked so in time I’ll get to take care of myself but atm I try my best to be loyal to friends and not spillover to anyone but I admit I feel less of a selfless loving friend I wanted to be in past. Again I’ll get help :L

Atm my hobbies are slowed, for these and other reasons, so whoever is waiting for something from me, I’ll do and I’ll try my best not to let you down fuzzbutts!

Hope the next chapter will be happier than this situation

ART RAFFLE HERE! :D

https://www.furaffinity.net/view/49821376/

check this journal out!

About the #ApriLantern and other tags
Totally honest buddies, I-AM-EXTRA-LATE and kinda stressed about my performance.
I'll do my best but 11 or 12 lanterns it's too much for me atm, so I'll open for max 2 slots for headshots or busts

For the Marchvel I did everything on rush, one of the peeps that requested the slot kist disappeared but I still miss one request from a close friend And I wanted to make one for myself but now it's a bit over so I'll stay on the run for the Lantern stuff.
About the upcoming tags, I'm worried, sure I can sort something out but the main problem is my workload, out of drawing I'm searching for a job while doing one on call, food delivery guy, I didn't study for this but it's holding well my expenses so I can hang out with fuzzies and normies.
By day I'm also crafting a comic-related costume and preparing a panel for my first upcoming con Furizon; so yeah, I'm being Busy, art is a hobby for me at and so will be for time income, this is not an excuse for having a bad commitment I know. I'm earning my limits and I'll work on them so I won't let down anyone more.

About the comunity
Last year was a booming start. I got on holyday with the italian Macro comunity, I've met people in Modena, Rome, Turin and I got my New's Year Party with furs after years of comunity. This year started the same when I reached  GWP and Jason McMaddox for a short trip. I wanna keep this up since I already re-seen the Macro guys of  Macro_Micro_Italia and met  Drachetto  AverageJoey and  beartender
Being able to start my irl furry fandom is not only awesome but a payback I feel deserved for ages now. surely enough, now, only my budget's the limit X3

About myself and others
This 2021/22 is becoming also a moment where I'm reflecting on my relationships, I made a big mistake on january breaking the trust of a friend, I never ment to but, the mirror is broken, I hope my trust will be restored in time cuz it still hurts much.
I thought a lot of that, reminding another firend who's relationship went off overnight months ago; in addition recently a couple of people I knew (one more than the other) told me to step back...well to sum up, I'm very social, I avoid usless toxic drama and for many years until now I demostrated to be one of the few people able to keep up good relationships with MANY MANY furs 'round the fandom* but hell, these four mistakes are making me doubt myself socially speaking.
I don't wanna hold this much on this journal but surely I'll find time to re-open the topic later. For now, what I can tell is that I'm still learning, still trying to be the most openminded and welcoming guy but somedays it just doesn't work.

For now that's pretty much it. Devon's out.



*of course I've met a-holes as well, I keep my distances or deal with them as much as they deserve

I love this comunity.

I had a blast of a week, in many way for this matter. I went on holyday with a macro/micro furry group near Ravenna and I already miss them so much!
I felt the vibes, I breathed the air and got the loving and accepting mood. god I love this! love is little to describe the flows of tears I shed these days.
This was, in a way, my first con ever, I fought for my freedom in family and things are changing. I'm starting to heal my inner wounds, FOMO, loneliness, envy, anger and fears.



I started an internship since oct. and from march I'm gettin' payed, this ment I'm showing I can make it on my own AND also, not gonna lie, this was useful to get myself help with doctor via video calls and some face to face sessions. I'm better and I found the key to me to feel better and better, I need to focus on myself and fix my "shit" on my own, no more parents, no more issues from family, I'm getting closer to my 30ies and I wanna start to live. I lost much in 10 years and this is a scar. A scar burning like HCl on eyes and probably I'll get over with it in time with the help of love (who knows).


Also my Sonas are gonna change, I'm not the same I was 6 years ago, new times are coming and new me is ready to start.

for any (more) clearance, find me on Telegram or comment!

Well guys, I'm not a journal boy am I? X3
I will not bother with news on the italian situation about corona virus, we're dealing with it, I dealt with it and just today I got the results I'm healthy again from it.
happy right? :3

But this year, next to this joy lays of course a shit period, isolations, new rules and lockdowns and we got many issues so relevant that we're sick of. We have time and time is something that helped and scare the hell out of me sometimes. This period I got really blacks and whites. I finally graduated but atm my family is facing a huge problem with some payments and it's not my fault, I could give a fuck but I wont , they need my help and even though I still have some issue with them, things from the past, we're definetly need to help each other's now. The wrost shit issue is the mood at home these days, let's just say mom feels really passive-aggressive and seldom dramatic with someone; damn I can't wait this to cool down.

what else now? since I'm negative to that son of a gun virus I should be able to re start a work-learning period I started on october and in the meantime find new opportunities. Hopefully and Carefully.
This year started odd and I really went from chill to thrill atm, I need to make up my mind and get it busy often, passing that virus made me more sensible and social, I really want to get back to meet peeps and go out. In general I want to get back to my big goals and work on them, my novels, I want to go and settle down in Vancouver, to help some cause as volunteer and of course find a job to be independent (possibly live with a flat/mate).

I don't know when that news will come and spread "the vaccine is ready and is working" and I'm waiting for it, in the meantime I'm starting to get back on my feet(paws) and check myself out, for what I want and most important to train, learn languages, soft skills and other online stuff to enrich my profile.

I'll be posting a journal on december and again on january or february, unless I need to share something in the meantime. So feel free to comment or just read my wordflow. I'll get more active step by step.

See you next chapter and, if you're willing write notes or shout if you wanna meet me in chat, no rp.

BREIF AND SHORT.
I MOVED TO TURIN FOR STUDY AND IT WAS A FLOP SO FAR, BUT I'M SICK OF BEING SAD, I'LL CHANGE AND STRIVE HARDER TO GAIN WHAT I WANT

MORE EXPLANATION ON CHAPTER 12

PEACE FURFAGS X3

https://forum.eurofurence.org/index.php/topic,7138.0.html

---

I'm not goin to ef, and I'm not willing to talk about that for a while, but a friend of mine, Niglio is looking for roomastes to fill his room.

check the link out for more info:
https://forum.eurofurence.org/index.php/topic,7138.0.html

HEY GUYS CHECK THIS OUT!!
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/16155016/

you might win a free art from Vinark


Yes I admit it I'm affected by the, so called, Fear Of Miss Out; I get sick emotionally especially when is about the furry events, I've been missing lots during these years, in my own country too, I'm not thinking about EF or AC; I just had some close occasional meetings (one day-last) and somes with single nice guys; what's the deal? my folks are "scared" by furries, so they told me not to hang out with them/you guys*.
Nothing and nothing just some tears, a lot of pain and, long story short, I've almost lost my positivity, my happiness, my will to do effort for furries. I also thounght about leave this damn animal related stuff...but Ive got a mission, I want to work on the benefit** of you guys (and not only you).

What's Fear Of Miss Out? if you haven't checked it out somewhere, I can tell you it's esentially that motherf***ing feel when you miss an appointment, a meeting, something you care about, even cuz you know perfectly that people (and friends) have fun there. I've related it with "Envy" for two simple reasons:
I I'm still quite envious
II Fomo easily involves envy or jelaousness (and vice versa)

I'm luckly "seduced" by a furry, he's far from me but we're not in love yet. He's so kind to me and, of course, I wish he'd be here with me to hold me tight and tell me that "everything'll be fine"...nope! no goddamit one I can share my feels with, not like I whish to bring them down but, you know, love them and share what's left of my good self.
My other friends are ok with me, and so am I with them, but not all can/would understand me, the ones that know about furry are half helpful; just to say one is keeping on say I'd stop be so kind and cool with most of my fur friends, another guy is shifting the attention on the relation I have "face-to-face vs virtual". I can just thank them and sight, carrying on.

I wont stop my mission, I'm givin my lifetime to this, but hard times are hard! I can hust hope this pain will make me stronger emotionally without loosing my good self, my kindness.

Btw, for the news I'm in the second academic year, I've passed all the exams, ecept for one I'm gonna take this year, without loosing any year. About job, I'm disoccupated. About Art I'll post some scraps but nothing relevant atm.

step into the fire of self-discovery. This fire will not burn you, it will only burn what you are not"


*I've got kicked out of home once because I brought home a furry for a night.
**inner benefit emotions, relationship, motivation and some more fields

MPORTANT: to anyone who knows  ephias
It came to my attention that this guy ran into some serious issue about his heal. He needs a donation to solve this bad situation. Check out his journal at: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/6141227/

that'd be nice of you :)

Hey guys, how're you?

I really sorry for my promises, I've done nothing this period and this was mostly because of a fuckin' sickness of mine, I had stomach ill and this took over my head so I felt down at times, one late evening I had one othe wrost moment in my life (never wish that to anyone I swear).
I have to thanks everyone who was close to me, from my sis. to my parents and some of you too; I love you.

Now I'm gatting back and I'm gonna post what I promised you soo

HERE WE GO!!

Hello everyfurs, I'm finally beggining the new study period and the game will be HARDER!!!

My exams turned out good, 2/3 exams done, the third wasn't done due to a GOlDDAMN sickness at my belly (somes said I ate too many furries)...whatever, the results:

psychoanalysis' history 30+
social psychology; upcoming

This period is taking me too much time, so I've slowed many activities, still I'm happy to have shown you my poetries now, I'm pretty sure the upcoming period, at university, will put to test my knowledges and some believes too, it's psycohology ^w^ but for sure this means less time to spend here, so I'm finishing some works and then I've decided to post two short commissioned tales of mine, some photos* and two pics I'm finishing this period. About PC, no way, not now, sorry fellas

News?
- I've recieved PS but I'm still in need to learn 'bout it, hopefully I'll be a future geeky artist X3
- on Feb 2nd I've met some fursuiters and other awesome furs at a short comic con, IT WAS A BLAST!! and maybe...I've found an interesting one....nothing yet *want-him-so-bad * there it is, these photos ^w^

Very well guys, I'm (very) prid...em...proud to announce two good news

FIRST
I'm gonna submit my poetries; many are done in my past years but they still enchant me and many others. They'll be in original lenguage and in the comment I'll translate and comment 'em.
This wont be an hard work but I'll do it

I really hope you'll enjoy the art

SECOND
I gave my first exam at the university, I'm so high 'bout this!!
It turned out good, not so hard...due to my preparation
THe best thing was that I had many classmates to chat with before/after the test.
Why is that important?
Simple, before this exam I started a study gruoup wich is growin' and is strengthening the relationship between us, I've recieved many thanks and complients for my skills at psicohology, especially social psi.
that is what fullfills my hearts, to help and see true smiles on their faces.

When you are grateful, fear disappears and abundance appears
(Anthony Robbins)

This 2014 is starting with a big fuc_ing succes!

Especially for University, I'm appreciated by a mate of mine and my study group, founded in november/december, is getting bigger!!
I feel awesome! Happy! so damn high!

I've got a lot of plan and sraws coming for you guys!
The Arch/Angels the 7 sins and much more!

One day, you're going to have to make a choice. You have to decide what kind of man you want to grow up to be. Whoever that man is, good character or bad, it's going to change the world
(Jonathan Kent, the man of steel)

Hello guys! I'm here to wish you all a happy Christmas time! whenever you are or you fell. I'm sure you'll deserve it.

...I'm afraid, afraid of the period I'm in and about the 24/25 of December I'll pass, it could be my first cold Christmas.
During the past weeks my relationships are going up and down, there are a lot of your guys who are supporting me, others seems to be more and more a little less friendly than what I used to know; I just want to be friendly to all.
However, the biggest matter is the relation with my folks and relatives. I've had argues with my parents, due to my life choices, to my lifestyle and even to my personality! looks like I'm just a small brat who can't deal with reality, friends and strangers...In short, my folks doesn't like me, at all.

Seriously, I can admit my problems, my limits but they're asking too much, they ask me to become someone else I'm not, to become a damn soul-less office robot, to achieve my studies/work target and not to "waste time". I find this hurting so I don't feel at home with them, any more...and this 24th wont be the same. Relatives just tries to keep the status quo telling me to understand the situation, to understand them and speak speak speak (in this case I find it useless!); screw that!

I was scared and pissed off, at first, then I meditated* on this and I looked for compromises; you know what? I'll keep on gettin better, in every part** of myself, in my weak sides and in the "strenght" ones! no more usless enery wasted for energy-sucker people, at least the ones I have to deal in real.

I'll find a way out, because I'm strong! stronger than this!! stronger than what they say, I'll fix my broken pots and wash away the milk I spilled and, if I'll need, shed tears in silence.
I'm not gonna give up, in ANY POSSIBLE WAY!
I wont be alone, even if folks don't want me to meet furries I'll keep in touch with you. In addition I have angels close to me, like my sister who cares of me, my sweet sister, I love her, I'll always be on her side! she really can look into my soul and understand my feelings.
I'll find peace with family members sometime later and I wont regret anything!


Artistically speaking I'm working at pencil and I still find hard to turn my pics in digital so I'll see waht I'm able to do, otherwise, I'll post them on the scraps if they wont be ready in time. I'm workin also on my long tales; anyway I'm free for any commission/request!
Funny fact, in this period I inspire myself from two opposite subject, the 7 deadly sins (can't tell you why, right now) and angels/archangels and other angelic orders ^^...light and dark.

have a merry Christmas and a Happy new year

*I do indian meditation
**work out on my body, care of my home, care of my behaviour, my studies, art and much more!

Hi guys, I'm sorry to have not refreshed my journals, my fault.
I've tried to pust somes witht my smartphone but looks like I've to manage everything via laptop.
I'm in a strange period since university started, I'm happy to study (finally) something I love, psychology sciences.

during these months I've a relation with  LicaWolf95 but it ended badly due to our few contacts, both us had problems so, sadly, that was the best choice I could make. (...Scusami amore...)

On the other hand I'm starting new activities, icluded stories and videos* (not animation, not yet XP), my drawing still on pecil or ink (in the best cases) so for now I still can't turn out good stuffs; I'll see about that.
btw I'm waiting to meet  Zephir to finish a gift for him I made :3 ( http://www.furaffinity.net/view/12140355/ )

I whish you a good and happy week, for now it's all.

[b]success is not a destination but a journey![/u]

Hello everyone! I've seen the interest of yours so far at my page and journals of course.
Bad, very bad, but it's my fault too, I've gotta work out, a good lesson for everyone much of what exists must be earned!
It's not like I didn't knew, it's more like I had to apply that.

I've passed finally my high school exams, all turned out good, I'm officially graduated!
there I've applied myself, it's simple but it's quite awesome to finish this long part of my life; in addition, I must say that I've not celebrated so much with other classmates, not much but a dinner out togheter ^w^

The plan is now to develop on what I CAN DO before the university. Draw is one of them, I've got a couple of target in this field, they're secret for now but I'll tell them someday

...ya know, guys, I managed to find out the best way in order to excel, to best in what I want to do; is the non-stop work, I find out it when I wanted to best on sport, the best way is to keep on the high performance, maybe just low the intense but no that much I'd had difficulty to get back. any Errors? ok, I acept them, but no stop, no more U_U.

for now that's all, maybe I'll have a short chap to reflect on my life time...
for now keep in touch, and keep on watch, things are about to change here.

hello guys! it's been a while since I do road to my journal but I'm back.
I have been very busy lately, because I had to take it to take care about my exams. .. yap! it was a real hard work, trust me, to tell you the truth a times I've been thinking about moving everything the way I left everything, school, art and many other targets I had..now it was a moment it past.
So I said I'm back now and the day after I will finish these high school exams I promise I will take up back art.
During this period I had the chance to think about what is to work out, think about to the way I feel when I approciate myself while I work on what interest me.
It's an hard work (I know) but it pays back very well, it does actually. In addition there is a question I asked myself "how am I supposed to behave with myself? do I have to be harsh or do I have to be a little allowant?" tell me your idea about self tolerance.
I will meditate on this.
Followers, I will manage to find some time to scan or to do some digital pics, especially cuz I missed another watch this month and it's all my fault, I know, I'm not the best artist; epsecially when is about to keep up with news/pics (right now) it's a point I have to work on, still, Im here to and I will manage to do it with your help too.
To conclude I send you a big hug from the big happy,hungry, grey and white wolfy.

Be happy and thank for every moment you are given; not because you have to think that's the last moment of your life. Because that's are unique moment in your lifetime, yup, that's it ...that's all.
Castore

PS: I gave a this title because that song still makes me feel happy, even in hard times

According to some theologists those two sensation are to be damned in hell, not just by doing something wrong, but even the think or the plan something wrong.
On the other side experts in phsychology/anthropology give other explanations about those behaviours; my question is

What if one calls the other? if so, which one starts at first?

My experience so far gave the chance to answer in a way I'm about to tell you(§). First let's put before that I speak to discuss and I don't own the truth:

I've been envious for ages, since when I realize what it does really means. Fortunately I never came to the point of acting badly (ex. to have a scuffle) at times I just teased passively others, but I'm seriously thinking that the childhood jelaousy got so strong and so "sneak" that now I find myself to feel too bad when I realize that someone (just few artist and sport mates or lovers I confess) exceed me (or in general has got something more than me). This year I say STOP! I don't really want this to beat me; so, I started to ask to my relatives, friend and others what do they think or do when they're jelaous/envious of someone, many answers and many methods, they worked but to be honest each second time I felt jelaousness seemed stronger, like a bacteria I'd say.I thanks those people, of course they love me so they helped me, but, at this point, there're three possible explanantions I came to the conclusion to:

A) I need to find my own special solution...or magical wand; that is actually possbile, I strongly agree with the idea that differences among our specie is unpredictables. (the world is cool because is various, they say ^w^)
B) I'd need to work out seriousy and mentally speaking, this'd interest me so much, I'm open minded I say
C) it could be (deeply) related to my lazyness, as you can see on my gallery, I'm not, yet, a workaholic (even if my focus right now is the graduation)

Let's say that I took in consideration this last possibility simply bacuse I saw the results of my lazyness many times (form school to sports or hobbies too), but thanks God, I can say I'm not passive when it's about to deal with emotions or serious issues, so I believe I'm not really [b]Sloth[/u].
As many the kids in the world I was lazy, normal no? but, at the age of 20, shouldn't I be a little more worry than then?
On this last "sin" I'm doin' everything and this evening I even suggested my parents to be more strict with me, 'cause I'm already with myself. On the other hand I wonder if I'm not getting so strict that everything 'round me act in the same way, I like challenges and this could be a chance to get better once more, but still this one makes me feel sad seldom.

§So my answer is: yes, lazyness calls for jelaousness.
I'm working on these feelings as said, and the mantra I've created with my last pic. risk to vanish, considering that time I even did my best (honestly I feel bad to look at the result it gave me); my point is to best my weakness, I'm a fighter and I do wanna be a great one so tell me your point, I'd really whish to share it with you guys.


post scriptum: the title refers to the theological demons of those sins, I've already send 'em back to hell if interests you
reference of the pic. here: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/10277018/

Yeah guys, I'm 20 for 2 hours and 20.
It's kinda funny cuz I'm still here on mah bed writin' this journal ...and of curse I've chated, litened to music ...and even play; somehow today I've spent the last teen day doin a mix of some habits I had when I was 11-12-13 and some of 18-19, what turned up? a scramble of time i'd say. I mean that I used my time to do something usefull and somehting useless.
By the way I can just say it's quite interesting, I promised myslef to be happy..so let thisbe and have some fun, cuz the only thing I ask is to live a little less faster now ^w^

for the art I'm about to finish some draws and then I'll show the photos, I'll let ya know guys ^^

I share here in three lenguages how happy I felt today:

English:
I miss something in my life right now, I know and I'm looking for it.
I do need it but, by hearing this* melody, I remember myself how much important is my mission, right here right now.
I call him God, don't know about you, and I thank him every day for the challanges he gives me in order to make me growa and smile
I also thank all those close to me and the ones that loves me the way I am, because I'm an infinte who is increasing, a seed that is sprouting (and not just me, seems).

Someday I want to turn back and smile, looking a vallaey where my days lay, then again, turn forward and take back my voyage for new challenges, for new horizons. Until I reach the peak, where the sun doesn't sets.

Italiano:
Mi manca qualcosa nella vita in questo momento, lo so e la cerco.
Ne ho tanto bisogno ma, sentendo questa* melodia, mi ricordo di quanto importante sia la mia missione qui e ora.
Io lo chiamo Dio, non so voi, e lo ringrazio ogni giorno per le sfide che mi pone per farmi crescere e sorridere.
Ringrazio anche le persone che mi sono vicine e che mi amano per come sono, perché sono un infinito che sta aumentando, un seme che sta germogliando (e non solo io, a quanto pare)

Un giorno vorrò voltarmi e sorridere guardando una valle sconfinata dove risiedono i miei giorni, poi di nuovo, voltarmi avanti e riprendere il viaggio per nuove sfide, per nuovi orizzonti. Fino a raggiungere la vetta, dove non tramonta il sole.

Espanol:
Extraño algo en mi vida en este momento, lo sé, y estoy buscándolo.
Lo necesito pero, al escuchar esta* melodía, me recuerdo a mí mismo cuán importante es mi misión, aquí y ahora.
Yo lo llamo Dios, no sé tú, y yo le agradezco cada día por los retos que me da para permitirme crecer y sonreír.
Además, le agradezco a todos quienes son cercanos a mí que me quieren como soy, porque soy un infinito que se incrementa, una semilla que brota (y no sólo yo, se ve).

Algún día quiero mirar hacia atrás y sonreír, viendo un valle donde mis días yacen, entonces nuevamente, mirar hacia adelante y retomar mi viaje por nuevos retos, por nuevos horizontes. Hasta que llegue a la cima, donde el sol no se esconde.

Happiness is a path, in my case I'm lucky, I feel it once a day, at least.
Thaks to  htfcuddles for his help for the spanish one, I need to review it!

*link http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i7MLT4MmAK8&list=FLekEs9aXeCU5f2LtuEPRWTA