http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LowdAWkXDRk

enjoy! =D

from a team whom everyone looked down on, Who would have thunk that the Saints would see the day that they would Be the Best Team on the NFL, win the NFC championship game, AND WIN THE SUPER BOWL!!!

GGGOOOOO SAINTS!!!! WOOOOOO!!!!!! =DDDD

Well... heh... as usual, here I am again...

I am preparing for my possible final good byes to the last remnant of unconditional love I've held on to for the passed 10 or so years... The one... who's always been there through my loney days and nights...

we've done all we can to kickstart his liver again, but the last diagnosis showed that his kidnies and other systems were starting to shut down as well....


My only glimmer of hope, is that he's been more responsive, has actually drank and eaten some on his own, but its too soon to tell if he'll recover or if we'll have to let him go...

if my cat goes... My Loneliness will be complete...

Please don't leave me all alone...

come watch me draw right now! =)

http://www.ustream.tv/channel/cadc-drawing-live%21

well, I felt I should draw some more today, so I think I'm gonna ustream so you guys can watch if you're interested ;)

http://www.ustream.tv/channel/cadc-drawing-live%21

As strange as that sounds, I actually did... Something I've never bothered to do before, because of course... "who cares, I don't even know you..."

that, and the fact that my gallery is mostly a partyhouse that single drifters come and go, and never open these doors again..

But, a few days ago, a lovely hamster sporting a purple ribbon tie, and a fellow dragon whose optimism is truely a wonder.

They walked through these rusty doors and embraced me, They returned my kindness and actually found interest in me (something not many do)

they have taken the time to read my journals, and extend a supportive hand, and though I'm still very much alone in this world, the feeling of knowing that someone cares about you is indescribable..

Thankyou  amandathehamster and  akkushisu I hope we remain friends ^_^

---

PS: I thankyou both for the wonderful gift art that you two are working on for me, and I'm glad that I was the source that inspired you to create it, I can't wait to see the finished version =)

and remember to mention that I'm wide open to anyone who feels anything at all for me ^_^

PS2: to everyone else who has also read and responded to my journals, don't think I've forgotten about you, I equally thankyou for supporting me in these harsh times =)

sigh, well... here I am again..

my weekend has been taken, Today's a holiday, and everyone's already claimed a piece of it, as if time itself does not belong to me as well... it never does, it never ends... the demands just come and come, And I always feel like I'm falling into pieces...

My parents say College is my highest priority, so why am I the only one who seems to believe that?

"Hey! Lets get our son to do all our crap for us! his time doesn't matter anyways!" "Hey, that is a brilliant idea!"

so I spend all weekend working, and even today, which was supposed to be a holiday, while on the other far side of the universe, College work is still waiting to be done...


So finally, the work ends, after Managing everything on my own, and wishing nothing more but to go home and get started on my work, But Lo and behold!

"Hey! I'm home! can you bring down this extremely light box of which I'm more than capable of lifting on my own? K! Ty!"

Sigh...

"Yo, I'm home now, and I need a quick favor! I need you to drive half across town to help me drop off the U-haul truck!"

Sigh.............

"Hey! Now that you're back, Can you bring my stuff to the car?

Siiiiiighhhhhh................

"Oh, Can you do me a favor? Can you drive half across town once more to go deliver this Fedex Package?!"

"No.."

"No?"

"No"

"Come on, its still early"

"NO! I'VE ALREADY DONE EVERYTHING FOR YOU THIS ACCURSED DAY!"

*Walks off*

....


7:00pm, Monday, and I've yet to start on my college work... 90 something icon / sketches I gotta do tonight, and its due bloody tomorrow morning at 8am...

Wonderful

Life sure seems alot easier when its everyone elses time you're wasting other than your own...

but I digress, my existance will continue to be but a mere illusion till the day I get out and move out...

If ever anyone wondered why a Black Dragon became the Simbol that represents me, well, I can assure you it wasn't because of Sugar, Spice, and everything Nice.

Well, it used to be that way, but I believe true happiness came and went during the first 10 years of my life (which seemed eternal to me back then), but I don't know, if True Happiness will ever knock at my doorstep ever again.

After those 10 years, and with the death of my ever loving Grand Parents, The gates of Tribulation opened in my life, Not a day went by in which I wouldn't ask myself what sort of Crap I'd have to put up with today.

as the years went by, my days grew longer, grew colder, grew loveless. Alone, in a foreign land, in a world that didn't understand me (and I failed to understand it).

I used to be a Firm Believer, my faith was shakened. I Felt forsakened by God, I wondered what this child had done to deserve this, I asked it many times.

My Tears were dry, my emotions were vanishing, and sustaining a fake smile became torture. I could not express my true feelings, doing so would bring more harm than good, and so I bottled up the pain, the anger, and the hate, inside my heart, Now Callist and heavy as stone..


The Time of Dreams were gone, the nights only made bearable by the only one who still showed me what unconditional love and affection still meant.. My Cat.. and my Teddy Bear.. that keeps a constant reminder of Far happier days I know of no more.

Remaining in the Shadow of My parents, I have no choice but to embrace the darkness, and hope that there's a light, at the end of the 4 year tunnel.

..........

Its a wonder my mind remained intact, now split into 3 identities.

There was a time I used to seek companionship, but now all I desire is Loneliness, and a few friends I can trust...

My life has made me an introvert, and Logic has helped me find Peace in this world.

To my friend in black and white, I thankyou for your friendship.

Cadc

---

Inspired by  Katmomma's journal, who's apparently going through the hell I had to go through http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/1114796/

Thas right! Last night i got it set up, and Started drawing while people were watching, and had an all out good time havinging people to talk to while Drawing!

I really thank  astroskunk for being there, and a friend or two of mine, really much appreciated, and hope to do this more often =D

KANE! He's the NEW CEO Of Electronic Arts!! =D

http://www.commandandconquer.com/me...../hot-seat-kane

AWESOME! Kane's ma man!

Well, now that I've completed  tamurross 's commission, and summer break is around the corner, I think I'm ready to open again, so if anyone's interested, leave me a message so we can discuss the project together.

Here's 2 examples of my artistic capabilities:

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/1575469/

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/2205328

Please do remember to check my commission options and price ranges in the commissions tab.

Thankyou

Well, it certainly has been an eventful month, and I'm glad to say I am 90% done with this Commission by  tamurross , and lets just say that its coming out exceptionally well =)

I've put alot more effort on this than I did on my Dragon drawing, and I have taken newer risks along the way to develop my artistic techniques, and my risks are paying off!

so anyways, the background is nearly complete, and that will leave the main character, which hopefully shouldn't take too long either

I expect to be done sometime by the middle or end of next week

If you guys have been wondering why i haven't uploaded anything all this time, it's because i'm working on a full fledged commission for  tamurross featuring.... "well i won't spoil the surprise

anyways, the commission status: 75% complete

once the commission is done I'll posted here (and if i have  tamurross's approval, I'll also post the concept sketches I did

I was kind of worried i may not see the end of Spyro, Dawn of Dragon by the time college starts up again, alas, i wish i wouldn't have.

this isn't to say the ending was not memorable, however, it saddens me to think that i don't think there will be another sequel to the game (and just when things were looking extremely good for the game and the series itself!)

anyways, I won't give spoilers of the ending, but if you've played the game through to the end, you'll know what i'm talking about.

However, I will treasure this game in my heart and mind forever!

Thankyou Sierra, it was an adventure I hope to replay again some day

I gotta say, out of all the games I own for the Wii, I don't think any has drawn me into the action like "Spyro, Dawn of the Dragon" has. The storyline picks up where the second in the series left off, and at last the graphics were revamped.

the begining was a little difficult because you are faced with an Earth Gollem, and the battle system was completely changed (I can't say for better or for worse, because eventually i got pretty good with the new battle system).

One of the best things that i was really hoping for was for the ability of independent flight (something the series was terribly lacking), and atlast my wish did come true! The flight system isn't as free as i would have hoped, but damn! Thanks for taking such a huge leap! i got tired of having 2 useless wings and having to run from place to place, Freedom of flight has truely released a sence of freedom within the game, and the environment itself.

And speaking of environments, the Secret forest was... "Wow...." just gorgeous! the experience of flying through that environment while listening to my all time favorite Spyro theme was unforgettable, i honestly did not want to leave that place, i was in inner harmony with a virtual world.

Also never a dull moment, some moments do get a little confusing, i must admit, but all it takes is a little thinking, knowledge, and common sence to figure something out.

2 of the epic battle scenes i've been through so far was the second encounter with the gollem in dragon city, and protecting dragon city by fighting off the towers and repairing the cannon every now and then.

only flaw i see in the game is that the background characters have no speech lines, and that hunter (your ally throught the game) looks like he helps you but he really doesn't. that and Sparks has become almost an unnecessary element to the game.

other than this, i gotta say, it's nice to finally be a dragon, rather than wishing i was one ;)

I'm very likely to make a tribute drawing to Sierra, that is how much i am enjoing this game =)

Ok, so things have taken a turn for the better, I finally recieved my first commission! Woot woot! =D



so anyways, I'm currently working on sketches to get a feel for the character, soon I'll be moving to the final sketch before coloring it.

Currently, my commission request progress is 35% complete.
at 50%, the coloring job will begin!

Thank you  tamurross for giving me the honor of having my first commission! I only hope you will be pleased with the end result :)

[Start-emo]

Well, things have been going too slow for my own "dissatisfaction," Even slower than usual (which isn't to say much).

I feel a little left out, i guess that's the fundamental point of this Journal, Sometimes i feel that I keep posting my art for little to no Damn Reason at all.

I didn't bother to post my drawings for my own health, believe me, I'm a college student, and my time has a tight rope with a very small loop arround it, and i still make my best effort to post my art out there in the hopes that newcomers to my gallery will view, enjoy, "And share what they thought of my work." Not to be 5 seconds of eye candy and to be lost forever in the Bottomless sea that is the Browse database...

Oh... and there's nothing else that Bugs the crap out of me, than people that go arround faving just for the freaking sake's of faving... (granted, the only upside to that is that my work goes to some unknown FA user who will probably never get any intrest due to lack of artistic talent...

And the Other thing that Bugs me even more than that, are the people who watch me, and never comment on my work... it's like, Why the hell did you even bother? to me you're just an avatar that is on my watcher's list, nothing more...

(Till this day, out of 29 watchers that i have on my list, Maybe 3-5 comment, if that....)

Do you really wanna know what I think?

---

[PATHETIC]

---

What is but 1 extra minute of your time to let me know how you feel about my work??? I feel like my art page is invisible, like I'm secluded in my very own room with lots of great work, but no one out there to appreciate it... (it feels like DA all over again.... and it's sad to say that it made me quit drawing for an entire year because i just wasn't seeing the point of waisting my time anymore...)

(but thank you to the very few who have remained for the most part faithfull)
 ozoneserpent  BloodyWolf  Tareck  Roo-meister

you are some of the few that keep me going, thank you!

with that said, i am gonna let you, tell me, what I've done wrong. What sin have I commited that i am to not be worthy of your time, and your thoughts? Be honest, all $#!7 aside, I want to know.

Why is it that this drawing only deserved 7 views?
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/1720731/

Why is it that after spending 3 and half "Months" on this piece, I only get.... (well actually 5 comments is truely a surprize to me....)
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/1720731/

Yes, I know i'm a little frustrated, and a little on edge, but I simply would have thought that after 2 - 3 years in Deviant art, and 1 - 2 years Here on FA, that things would have changed for me by now...

It's not like I'm not putting up any F'ing effort, I mean, 3 and half months on a single drawing?! where else do you hear of something as crazy as that now a days?!

I am so unrecognized -_-....

[/End-Emo]


I joined an online Comic site, and I'm required to post their url here, soo..

<a href="http://www.onlinecomics.net"><img src="http://www.onlinecomics.net/images/.....80x15.gif"; width="80" height="15" border="0"></a>

i hope html code works here, lol

if not, here's a link: http://www.onlinecomics.net/pages/m.....ics/submit.php

well, I'm giving you a chance to make up what you think my commission prices should be!

well, I know my prices are a bit too high, so pls post prices you think you'd be willing to pay for my work.

if I feel I like a certain idea, I'll take it and give you a free commission ^_^

so start brain storming ^_^

Well, now that I've finished Ozone's gift commission (drawn to his Specifications), I'm now ready and open for Commissions!

Styles to choose from:

Pencil Sketch - $10
Pen sketch - $15
Digital Vectoring - $20
Digital Logo - $20
Digital Coloring - $45
Full Digital (2 months+) - $75

---

Color Styles:

Color Pencils
Cell Shading
Full Shading
Suggest one!

---

Add ons:

Add a Character - $5
Submitting your own Line work: - -$10 off regular price

I've been looking over at some of what other people charge for their commissions, I've seen some pretty low ones, then again not up to my standards.

I know I'm not great at anatomy, but I'm very good as far as coloring goes.

anyways just had a rough morning, just thought I'f have some suggestions from ppl willing to commission me, heh.

Well, I've finally started in the commission business, Pay per draw so to speak, Making drawings for other people =)

My first Commission goes to  ozoneserpent it's a free gift commission for my first customer, consider it a gift ;)

For now, full time Commissions are closed, however I'm sure I can also handle a pencil or pen sketching while on the go, so don't worry, I'm still not fully booked yet ;)