I have a post of an animation someone gifted me ages ago, and I should've asked this sooner! How does one get it to upload on like catbox or something similar and keep the quality good? @w@ I'm a bit of a klutz

Uh... Yeah... I'm back to living in a hotel again... The coworker I was staying with, his family was undergoing a divorce case and they lost their house. Which resulted in me having to go basically back to square one once again... I dunno what I'm gonna do or what I can hope to achieve with how this being once more, another loss of a place to call home again and once more, more time that I'm not gonna be able to even afford myself anything... I... I'm just at a point I contemplate even writing this for a vent, sometimes even keeping this account at times because I question my value as a human being all around and if I'm really worth keeping around... Especially with how when I think things are going up, has managed to crash down every time... I dunno how much more I'm gonna be able to handle life without it trying to drive me mad, but I'm doing my best... Will try and keep in touch... Ciao

Well... Once again, I don't have a home now... I'm very exhausted to really go into details, but fam got evicted... Again. And I don't have much money myself to go back to the hotel life... But I should hopefully be alright... Pray for me.

Well, this month was fairly bad. From the several breakdowns I've fought from having, the birthday that my family pretty much forgot about and the gifts I bought myself being pretty much taken by my siblings. This new year has not gone great. And I do love and thank to those that has helped keep me sane so far, but it just feels like it gets harder with each passing day, even now, I'm unsure if this is just a vent or how I genuinely feel,, but these thoughts has progressively gotten worse the Longer I kept them in my head. I feel like all that I have worked hard for and eatned is just falling apart and being taken away, saving money isn't possible having to give it all to my family once again for food and laundry. All the plans I've had for buying myself art for once once again gone down the drain as well as even getting myself a new console, pc or even vr headset... Knowing how things may go, I do really doubt on being able to achieve my goals, dreams and hopes of all the things that I so desperately wanted in life and just have to settle with being left behind in this advancing world.

Yesh. It is the day that is of my bday <w> Now I'm 24... Yay? Lol
Well, that's all I kinda got, not really able to do much or afford a cake so... Life .w.

Well, Christmas was a major bust. Haven't even had one to celebrate, been scraping by with every cent of money I had, and even lost a PS5 to the pawn shop on Christmas day. Just struggling with funds to just keep a roof over my head every day. Frankly, with the way things are going, I'm more than likely just gonna skip my bday upcoming as well... Even though it's about 2 weeks from now, I don't really see myself being able to celebrate it either

Merry Christmas everyone!~ Hope everyone has a great day and a lovely Christmas!~ <3

Might make some changes and see what I can do to make the page a little more unique and better looking. I'm still a bit out of league doing so, so I might need help with that. I.e. color text and all that jazz. Gonna be moving/removing some people, just for more emotion and mental reasons. But I wanna make my page looking good :3

It be my b-day! Kinda excited but not at the same time I'm not. Since I gotta work on it

Eh... I dunno if I should make this journal as a vent or not. But fuck it... Been a rough time lately, having to work a lot just to keep a roof over my family's head, nearly giving my entire paycheck weekly to them just so we're not homeless to hardly ever talking to the friends I've held close. Alongside with this stupid war and "prophetics that the Rapture is upon us" stuff... I'm so depressed I feel so sick to my stomach. I'm tired of trying to hold onto the friends I care about so much and those I love just to be forgotten... I could just use some advice or motivation, because my mind isn't in the best of places.

Well, things have gotten worse for me as of late. And I have been hoping that things would've turned better... So we've been kicked out of our former apartment complex, staying at a friend's place but there was only so much that they could do until they are now fed up and wanting us to leave... Me and my fam has no where to go within budget anywhere... Let alone have any money to even rent a U-Haul.... I don't know what to do and I'm honestly scared.

Great update to the rule enforcement, I mean, minus the fact that you are digging an even deeper hole than what yah got. Like I get such a rule for certain things, but it has became way to vague and just plan stupid. :T I'm sure many people could agree but now it's like your adding acid to a wound that you've already done damaged beyond repairs. I know I don't have such content in what is in those rules, but many other people who's even there own character and so on, well, kinda fucked 'em over now. Congrats on stooping so low. Like you might as well become Tumblr. smh

Bruh, why is it that some people that I think are some fun, enjoyable people to at least chat with happen to end up being some skeptical little crap these days? Like I shared my F-List with someone and the next thing I know, it's "Oh, I can't associate myself with you." Like wtf does that suppose to mean? Over one little kink or one thing that is either a dislike or a like, some mf wants to get overly hurt by it. People need to get real and respect someone's kinks or just not be around/on sites at all.

Welp, it's getting close to the time of year. My B-Day ~w~ I'm not all too excited about it, but I have my hopes up that it'll go good this time around.

Well... I feel like utter and utmost shit. Just for telling them that I was poly, that I don't like being in a monogamous relationship... I thought that they knew that I am an open relationship person, and that I told them. But I guess it slipped my mind... I had figured that given that even in my bio of most things and even here. I have pets, Masters and Mistresses... Guess I was wrong... Now that I told them, I just feel bad and panicked and blocked them..... I don't really know how to feel about it now... I feel very numb I guess, I really loved them a lot.. But I guess things aren't just meant to be.

Man, don't you love it when you're either having a good conversation with someone or you're roleplaying with them, having a grand time, you end up just being left ignored and on 'read'? Like, it's not hard to state that you're busy or anything, considering that you opened the message and read it. -w-# It seems like it's gotten more frequent nearly everywhere these days, here, telegram, *F-List, even *Discord (*though it doesn't show if someone read your message or not). What gets me is that sometimes, people message me first to rp or talk then ignore me shortly after. Like come on, there's common courtesy around here.

So I was on Discord and someone else on my friends list got hacked from a channel on Discord. Getting a message that they were blocking me and so on. I was confused and I clicked on the channel and scanned the qr code on it. Only for most of my friends list to get blocked as well. I managed to fix much of it, but I don't remember all the names to friend everyone back. >,^,< So I wanna warn everyone that if you see something like that, hope that your friend unblocks you and DON'T CLICK THE CHANNEL

Oof. I forgot that today was Valentines Day .3. Eh, whatevs. Not like I had one anyway ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Hope everyone else's valentines day is going good though! uwu

Welp!~ My birthday is coming up in 9 days. .3. Dunno if I should be excited or not. ^~^ I ain't got much to do for it, let alone am I gonna get many presents since family has all moved out of state and all that jazz .-. But hey, I guess getting older has gotta be a good present? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

So I was chatting with someone that had similar interests with mine, but wasn't into anything "NSFW" and this douche of a "Vore lover" blocked me. [Name redacted to respect Privacy] to be exact. -3-# Like, we were chatting on Discord and I asked him of his kinks and such if he was into anything nsfw, but as he said that he wasn't he full out went and blocked me on all forms of media, even here. Like, all you had to do was say that you weren't and that would be fine, but to block me like immediately afterwards was a kick in the balls. T-T In my opinion, I don't recommend talking, roleplaying, or watching him. He's just a douche.
It's very tempting to expose him, but I feel like I shouldn't, just so he don't get his panties in a bunch. -.-'

Well, the New Year is coming up. And every year so far has never seemed to make me feel ever more lonely each time. This year now, I had no one to spend Thanksgiving with, no one to spend Christmas with, and upcoming New Years, the same thing... With my bday also being 2 weeks away... I don't know really... This might just be a vent post or not... But I'm just sick with being alone, having to talk to people behind a screen all day, trying to live fantasies that I know will never come to be reality, regardless of kinks, fetishes or what not that would further make it unrealistic. It's like, I love to please people and try and make them happy, though now, it just seems like I only end up hurting myself more in return. I don't even know. I've gotten my hopes up too many times and had every single one be shot down just as quick. This could just be my depression talking or not, but I'm just sick of it. Sometimes though, it's like I try to wear a smile on my face just because I believe one day that smile can become something genuine, but every night, that paper mask just ends up getting soaked with my own tears and disbelief....

I hope everyone else have a New Year though, and I apologize if my rambling sours the mood. But keeping this burdened with all my other issues would've probably led me down a wrong path.

Y'know... Their are days when I would chat with people and try to be friends with them or something, only to either be ghosted, ignored and just plain frowned upon. I mean, I understand if someone is shy or introverted, and i can honestly relate to that, for that I am quite a shy fellow myself. But sometimes, people have to take chances and in order to make friends, you'd have to talk to someone you may or may not know. I'm not saying that some people are just picky or such, but, like, c'mon now. Not everyone is such a bad person. For example, someone that I tried talking to, I won't give their name to respect their privacy, had only told me that they were shy around 'strangers.' I get that, and I respect it, but why would you just then ignore someone that literally introduces themselves and asks to just chat? I don't ever think I'll understand that at all, but for what it's worth, I guess it's probably for the best to be left at that. Well then, for those that are reading this and such, thank you for having to put up with my rant and/or messages and stuff. And I do apologize if I had in any way, shape, or form, made anyone uncomfortable with any of my comments.