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The Good, the Bad and the Painful
6 years ago
General
Time for one of them Updates that seem popular amongst folk.
So first the Good. For those who know me personally i have suffered from Major Depression for a long long long long time (and a bit longer then that). It has been a big contributor to my personality, the way I've treated people in the past, my views on life and expectations. Well since the beginning of the year i finally have been in Therapy, CBT specifically, and i have been making great progress, sure i have my wobbles and off days but in general i have been taking on board the techniques I'm being taught. It has changed me for the better, I'm being more sociable then i used to be, less of a bitter grumpy douche, being more proactive with most things rather then sitting and moping hoping for something to happen and generally being more positive. A cliche to say it but it has, and is, changing my life for the better and I'm trying so so hard to keep this going forever.
A bigger part of The good is that me and my Girlfriend Kim are no longer Boyfriend and Girlfriend, we are now Fiance's, and although we got engaged in a very, not romantic or typical way it was perfect for us embodying how we are and our relationship. Though i did propose to her properly at a later date using my Grandmothers Rings, was on one knee and everything. Although we have been together a short time it feels right, though we both agree we are ganna enjoy being engaged for a while before we think about actually tying the knot.
Onto the bad. As some may know Kim suffers from a fair amount of health conditions which led to me becoming her carer, as such we live off the state. This means we rely upon benefit payments, i myself get whats called Carers allowance and she gets Employment Support Allowance (ESA) and Personal Independence Payments (PiP). Now, she was on PiP before we got together due to the mobility restrictions of her hips and her mental health having been granted the second highest rate available. Since her original Claim her Mobility issues have worsened along with new conditions being diagnosed, such as the Non-Epileptic attacks and the Adult Asthma. We updated her ESA and my Carers with this new information both of which accepted the update happilly and continued to pay us the correct rate. PIP however, went the other way, we contacted them to not only update them on Kims conditions, something we are obliged to do by law, we also requested that we go up to the highest rate of PIP which allows the use of the Disabled Badge and use of the Mobility Scheme which gives us a Disabled Friendly Vehicle. Instead, they turned around and have reduced her money citing that her mobility is somehow better then when she originally claimed and that when she went for her assessment she didn't show any signs of mental health. So now we have less money to try and live off of whilst going through the lengthy appeals process which is causing us both heaps of stress.
Now the painful. Unfortunately i myself am now dealing with Chronic pain, the pain is located in my right side around my ribs, this started 2 years ago whilst i was working, but it came and went and wasn't all that noticeable. Fast Forward to now and its not only constant it is excruciating. Its becoming more and more difficult to do basic tasks, even sitting at my computer quickly becomes to much to bear at times and so i have to retreat and lay down until the sensation is tolerable. As you can imagine this impacts my role as Kim's carer and is making my recovery from depression rather hard. Right now they think its something called Costochondritis which as far as i know is an inflammation of the muscle and cartilage between your ribs and the chest wall, the issue i have is there's no known cause nor is there any real treatment other then painkillers and anti inflammatory's. So it sucks big time, the other concern i have though is that there feels like a physical body which im having to poke my Dr about to have looked at as i fear there maybe something more untoward going on, so id rather it be looked at and nothing be there then to not look and something be there.
So BIG ol update over and done with, i appreciate if you have read it all, despite it all I'm holding my chin up and plodding on
So first the Good. For those who know me personally i have suffered from Major Depression for a long long long long time (and a bit longer then that). It has been a big contributor to my personality, the way I've treated people in the past, my views on life and expectations. Well since the beginning of the year i finally have been in Therapy, CBT specifically, and i have been making great progress, sure i have my wobbles and off days but in general i have been taking on board the techniques I'm being taught. It has changed me for the better, I'm being more sociable then i used to be, less of a bitter grumpy douche, being more proactive with most things rather then sitting and moping hoping for something to happen and generally being more positive. A cliche to say it but it has, and is, changing my life for the better and I'm trying so so hard to keep this going forever.
A bigger part of The good is that me and my Girlfriend Kim are no longer Boyfriend and Girlfriend, we are now Fiance's, and although we got engaged in a very, not romantic or typical way it was perfect for us embodying how we are and our relationship. Though i did propose to her properly at a later date using my Grandmothers Rings, was on one knee and everything. Although we have been together a short time it feels right, though we both agree we are ganna enjoy being engaged for a while before we think about actually tying the knot.
Onto the bad. As some may know Kim suffers from a fair amount of health conditions which led to me becoming her carer, as such we live off the state. This means we rely upon benefit payments, i myself get whats called Carers allowance and she gets Employment Support Allowance (ESA) and Personal Independence Payments (PiP). Now, she was on PiP before we got together due to the mobility restrictions of her hips and her mental health having been granted the second highest rate available. Since her original Claim her Mobility issues have worsened along with new conditions being diagnosed, such as the Non-Epileptic attacks and the Adult Asthma. We updated her ESA and my Carers with this new information both of which accepted the update happilly and continued to pay us the correct rate. PIP however, went the other way, we contacted them to not only update them on Kims conditions, something we are obliged to do by law, we also requested that we go up to the highest rate of PIP which allows the use of the Disabled Badge and use of the Mobility Scheme which gives us a Disabled Friendly Vehicle. Instead, they turned around and have reduced her money citing that her mobility is somehow better then when she originally claimed and that when she went for her assessment she didn't show any signs of mental health. So now we have less money to try and live off of whilst going through the lengthy appeals process which is causing us both heaps of stress.
Now the painful. Unfortunately i myself am now dealing with Chronic pain, the pain is located in my right side around my ribs, this started 2 years ago whilst i was working, but it came and went and wasn't all that noticeable. Fast Forward to now and its not only constant it is excruciating. Its becoming more and more difficult to do basic tasks, even sitting at my computer quickly becomes to much to bear at times and so i have to retreat and lay down until the sensation is tolerable. As you can imagine this impacts my role as Kim's carer and is making my recovery from depression rather hard. Right now they think its something called Costochondritis which as far as i know is an inflammation of the muscle and cartilage between your ribs and the chest wall, the issue i have is there's no known cause nor is there any real treatment other then painkillers and anti inflammatory's. So it sucks big time, the other concern i have though is that there feels like a physical body which im having to poke my Dr about to have looked at as i fear there maybe something more untoward going on, so id rather it be looked at and nothing be there then to not look and something be there.
So BIG ol update over and done with, i appreciate if you have read it all, despite it all I'm holding my chin up and plodding on
As for the benefit payments, PIP is notorious for hiring shitty assessors, it could be missing your legs and they'd say you've got full movement because you were able to attend the meeting. Keep on with the appeals process, they'll rule in your favour eventually and back pay what is owed from the date of the changed value. Possibly worth writing to your local Map or county councillor, that sometimes results in things being given a swift kick up the arse.
Hopefully your own health picks up before long too, but keep on at your GP if you think it could be more serious, you might have to pester them a few times but just keep on, they'll book you in for tests if needed.