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My life hurts
7 years ago
General
Okay, but not so much now.
So I haven't been as active as I used to be, and even turned down a few commissions in the last few months because I knew I just couldn't rely on myself to get them done.
Everyone goes through hardships in their lives and I don't want that to be my excuse as to why I don't get things done. But there was definitely a period of time in which I just could not take care of myself, let alone be responsible enough to take people's money and give them back something in return, so I didn't.
Basically what happened was I went through a terrible break up on Christmas. I don't want to go slinging mud at those involved but let's just say I was burned and I was burned hard.
Four years just gone and I completely lost myself, my identity and what I thought was going to be my life. I ended up having to go stay with my parents for weeks because I could not do anything for myself. I was a real mess.
Fast forward to today and things are a lot better. In some ways this experience has sort of kicked me in the ass and showed me I had to get some things done, and I really needed to take care of myself. I'd say for a few months prior to this event I was in a deep depression, felt anxious and anti social, even leaving the house was too much for me most of the time. But now I have started on a new medication plan and I feel a lot better, I'm sleeping better and my anxiety and depression are under control. I have a new roommate who I actually enjoy living with which is a new thing because roommates in the past have always been a pain in the ass. But I am enjoying their company.
I think the biggest help I've gotten from is from
Thylus though.
This guy didn't know me much, his only interaction from me prior to Christmas was buying porn from me but for whatever reason he decided to say 'Merry Christmas' to me on Christmas and in my state I absolutely clung to him as the first person to reach out. It's sort of embarrassing now but he allowed me to vent and offered the support I needed at the time.
Flash forward to today and we have met twice with him coming to see me again in May. We bonded through a sort of mutual experience we had with people we thought we could trust and could not. He is an amazing person and I am so lucky to have him in my life and at my side. He has no reason to help me as much as he does but he does anyway and had without me ever asking him at all. He is the kindest man I've ever met and I'm so grateful for him to be in my life today. He also has a lot of porn in his gallery so if you're into that go check him out. owo
But yeah, that's kinda the update of my life these last few months. I am taking commissions but only limited slots because I'm just not as fast as I once was. I am looking forward to the future though and have gotten the spark back to draw again. It feels great honestly, art has always been a vent for me, a passion and never felt like a chore. I even enjoy drawing porn quite honestly lol. But yeh, sort of just taking it slow and learning how to live again.
Thanks for reading and still being watched to me. I appreciate it so very much. (:
- Vail
So I haven't been as active as I used to be, and even turned down a few commissions in the last few months because I knew I just couldn't rely on myself to get them done.
Everyone goes through hardships in their lives and I don't want that to be my excuse as to why I don't get things done. But there was definitely a period of time in which I just could not take care of myself, let alone be responsible enough to take people's money and give them back something in return, so I didn't.
Basically what happened was I went through a terrible break up on Christmas. I don't want to go slinging mud at those involved but let's just say I was burned and I was burned hard.
Four years just gone and I completely lost myself, my identity and what I thought was going to be my life. I ended up having to go stay with my parents for weeks because I could not do anything for myself. I was a real mess.
Fast forward to today and things are a lot better. In some ways this experience has sort of kicked me in the ass and showed me I had to get some things done, and I really needed to take care of myself. I'd say for a few months prior to this event I was in a deep depression, felt anxious and anti social, even leaving the house was too much for me most of the time. But now I have started on a new medication plan and I feel a lot better, I'm sleeping better and my anxiety and depression are under control. I have a new roommate who I actually enjoy living with which is a new thing because roommates in the past have always been a pain in the ass. But I am enjoying their company.
I think the biggest help I've gotten from is from
Thylus though.This guy didn't know me much, his only interaction from me prior to Christmas was buying porn from me but for whatever reason he decided to say 'Merry Christmas' to me on Christmas and in my state I absolutely clung to him as the first person to reach out. It's sort of embarrassing now but he allowed me to vent and offered the support I needed at the time.
Flash forward to today and we have met twice with him coming to see me again in May. We bonded through a sort of mutual experience we had with people we thought we could trust and could not. He is an amazing person and I am so lucky to have him in my life and at my side. He has no reason to help me as much as he does but he does anyway and had without me ever asking him at all. He is the kindest man I've ever met and I'm so grateful for him to be in my life today. He also has a lot of porn in his gallery so if you're into that go check him out. owo
But yeah, that's kinda the update of my life these last few months. I am taking commissions but only limited slots because I'm just not as fast as I once was. I am looking forward to the future though and have gotten the spark back to draw again. It feels great honestly, art has always been a vent for me, a passion and never felt like a chore. I even enjoy drawing porn quite honestly lol. But yeh, sort of just taking it slow and learning how to live again.
Thanks for reading and still being watched to me. I appreciate it so very much. (:
- Vail
j/k I get all of it and you could have done so much worse - half is very familiar. I'm not really here either; I guess you stopped at the same time I did - no one I know had a good year. If not for that I would have been trying to commission you again. Well cheers to some progress.
(Sorry to hear all that though; people on the web just disappear without a trace and I've gotten completely used to it - it's kinda dehumanizing)
I don't think being Canadian has much to do with it though. xD
I also wish to commend you not accepting commissions during this time because I use to know someone who would take on commitments that they could not follow through on. it's a tough decision not to draw for others, especially if this is your job. I'm so glad that you've got the spark to draw again and I hope your motivations for other things in your life will come back to you once more!
Sending good vibes,
Aimee