FA+
Shop
hmmmm....
16 years ago
General
Maybe it's contagious? Maybe it's because the last two days of work have actually sucked and I'm not used to that? Maybe it's because every now and I then I still ask myself "what the hell are you still thinking about that for?!?"
Regardless of the cause I am strangely depressed at the moment. They are my feelings, and as such they sure as hell aren't someone else's "fault" or problem. It's just sort of annoying that it's about to be 4am and I'm in this mood. Generally I'd force some sort of activity to get me out of this funk, but at the moment I feel a bit more like bitching. Somewhat uncharacteristic of me, but them's the breaks sometime, kids.
I wish I had a day, a full twenty-four hours, where everyone I spoke to could only respond with the truth. The downside to that wish is two fold; the first would be that removing the choice to lie from people is massively wrong, and two everyone would likely be emotionally butt hurt at the end of the day as every petty annoyance in the world is aired honestly. Alas, those are also the breaks, me.
Hell, I would love it if I had to tell the absolute truth to myself, but then I would have to have an absolute truth in a world of emotions, dynamic situations, and uncertainties.
In summation: I am unhappy at the moment and I'm not entirely sure why, but I wish it would stop already.
Regardless of the cause I am strangely depressed at the moment. They are my feelings, and as such they sure as hell aren't someone else's "fault" or problem. It's just sort of annoying that it's about to be 4am and I'm in this mood. Generally I'd force some sort of activity to get me out of this funk, but at the moment I feel a bit more like bitching. Somewhat uncharacteristic of me, but them's the breaks sometime, kids.
I wish I had a day, a full twenty-four hours, where everyone I spoke to could only respond with the truth. The downside to that wish is two fold; the first would be that removing the choice to lie from people is massively wrong, and two everyone would likely be emotionally butt hurt at the end of the day as every petty annoyance in the world is aired honestly. Alas, those are also the breaks, me.
Hell, I would love it if I had to tell the absolute truth to myself, but then I would have to have an absolute truth in a world of emotions, dynamic situations, and uncertainties.
In summation: I am unhappy at the moment and I'm not entirely sure why, but I wish it would stop already.
Oh what a lie!
Sometimes bitching for the sake of bitching is a good way to get out all of that irritation/frustration/anger/disappointment; but you just can't for the sake of unintentionally hurting someone's feelings. On crappy days bitching (venting) together with such a person can be a great way to let off steam and lighten the mood. But after a day from hell the shit demon follows you home; and trying to bitch together could turn into something much uglier.
It sucks to wait out the storm but it seems like the only thing you could do. I really hope you are feeling better and that today goes smoother for you. Just remember that the days would have been so much shittier if not for you.
1. Normal, everyday depression can be healthy. It's like feeling pain on a sprained ankle, telling you not to walk on it. It (in theory) makes us stop and analyze our lives, perhaps realize a thing or two that needs to be change. I'm not going to say you need to change anything, but keep that in mind. Just don't dwell on being depressed.
2. Manipulation is inherent in human communication. That's not bad or wrong, it just is. Generally speaking, almost everything we say we say with an eye on how it will affect others. If we didn't, well, we wouldn't need to say it, would we?
That doesn't mean we lie, cheat, and steal by nature. Quite the opposite--it means we care how our actions impact others, often regardless of how it affects us in return. Doesn't mean we're lying, either... How we phrase the truth has a big impact on what it means. Hell, sometimes we don't tell the whole truth simply because we can't.
2) I am now picturing your character with a white beard.
I suggest ice cream and bubble bath. It's like bandaids for the soul.
I am now picturing the full three hundred charging in extremely dramatic slow motion into an olympic sized bathtub with mounds of suds in the shape of their enemies. Spears lancing the piles while other Spartans do manly belly flops to show the bubbles who's boss.