Had a lovely few days and weekend so glad i have peeps there to perk me up and help me feel better and get on track again. After whats been a week of hell me and Z sat down and discussed alot about the fights and how we could try to improve things.

It was a mutual agreement I go to see someone regarding my emotions from splitting from the ex hub as well as a decade of pain I have harboured from past abuse i experienced and rather than dealing with it i laid everything in a shallow grave. I think once I can get off my chest whats bern paining me sand holding me back aggravating me moreso as time goes on, I can go back to how I used to be. Its the intention of me and Zuki for both our happiness to be preserved and continue building our loving relationship we both want.

This weekend I was able to be my softer character I am and not afraid of being rejected bc Im a soft sod. I didnt need to put up my hard front anymore and I felt so much better being able to be and feel myself again.

Thurs saw me getting to hang with an old friend who got me relaxed and chilled with trip to pub, few games of poole, visit to see bunnies and getting Babby Mynka and Rampant all started running and prepped for storage.

Fri my buddy from thurs came over helped with my Honda 200 getting her started up and running and he bought her so I know the old girl will be well looked after and the extra pennies helped! Also Zuki came down for weekend :)

Sat I went to the zoo with Zukster and did some filming which was uber fun and got to feed some goats hehe X3

Sun was a v chilled day and was able to have a nice relaxing sunday =3

For the first time when Zuki left I didnt feel sad or at a loss with myself, I felt happy in myself as a person that I didnt have a reason to be sad anymore. Zuki saw the person who I used to be come to the surface and was so happy to have this snuggly bubbly happy bat with him!

Glad I can start being myself and not feel ashamed of who or what I am <3