A thank you to my friends and everyone else who showed concern at my sudden, admittedly dramatic announcement. I certainly need to think about this before I do anything, as deleting the account is something I can't reverse. In truth I still just might, but idk. But at the very least I feel I should at least explain why I feel like doing such a drastic act.

To put it simply I'm not entirely enjoying it as much anymore. I mean for the most part people do you seem to care about my original works, and only care for the lewd art I draw. Which has kinda become the main thing I've drawn the past few months. Now drawing this kinda stuff isn't bad in of itself. But please understand that I am Asexual, I don't really like sexy stuff as it is so the fact that it seems all anybody wants to see is that stuff is admittedly disheartening. I like drawing did-gid art every now and then, but I don't like the idea of it being the only thing I ever make.

And yes I know, I should focus more on what I want to draw rather than what others want me to draw. But that is kind of also the thing: I don't truly know what I wanna do. To be honest most of the art I have ever made in the past 6 or so years was because I figured a friend would like it or somebody else will. Guess you could say it was my autistic ass attempting to make friends and keep the few that I had. But.... I've been doing art in this mindset for so long that I don't really know what I truly wanna make anymore. Like I don't know who I am or want to be as an artist. And without that general direction in my art... then what business do I have being an artist?

Plus in truth I feel like my characters as of late have been kind of crappy. Like I know I can make better but most of the ones I make now seem to me like they are kinda flat.

This also extends to my writing. As honestly I find my writing style to be atrocious to the point where even I don't wanna read my attempts at a story. Like.... to put it simply my writing feels flat. Like it's just a bland description of events with no real flair or anything to it. Which sure is fine when I am rping with friends, but is kind of abysmal when it comes to writing a story

Honestly it's to the point where I'm having a hard time seeing a reason to keep going. Which is ultimately why I'm considering deleting this account and stopping art altogether. A thought that in of itself is making me extremely depressed. I've always been a creative person, art has been a part of me for as long as I can remember. Be it drawing or just making a bunch of different characters just because it's fun, I have been making things my whole life. So the idea of never making anything again is.... something that genuinely hurts. But I just don't know what else to do as now art is starting to effect my mental health more negatively then positively. So this is kind of a damned if I do, damned if I don't situation.

Sorry for the wall of text. Just kinda dumped my raw thoughts out into text with no real editing. I just figured maybe I should explain how I feel and the thoughts that led to this.